I dive into the shanty. Grab my crossbow, sling my quiver on my back. Grab Pa’s bolt shooter. Empty. I throw it down with a curse. Snatch up his crossbow an quiver.
I come runnin out.
Pa! I yel . They got Lugh! I grab his arm, give him a hard shake. This is real! You got a fight!
Then it’s like he comes to life. He pul s hisself tal , his eyes spark an the Pa I remember’s back. He hauls me to him, holds me so tight I Then it’s like he comes to life. He pul s hisself tal , his eyes spark an the Pa I remember’s back. He hauls me to him, holds me so tight I cain’t hardly breathe.
My time’s nearly up, he says quickly.
No, Pa!
Listen. I dunno what happens after this. I could only see glimpses. But they’re gonna need you, Saba. Lugh an Emmi. An there’l be others too. Many others. Don’t give in to fear. Be strong, like I know you are. An never give up, d’you unnerstand, never. No mat er what happens.
I stare at him.
I won’t, I says. I ain’t no quit er, Pa.
That’s my girl.
He takes the crossbow. Slings the quiver on his back.
Ready? he says.
Ready, I says.
We start runnin. Runnin towards Lugh an the men on horseback.
One of the riders is loopin his rope into a lasso.
Load! yel s Pa. We each snatch a arrow. Load.
The roper twirls the lasso once, twice. Throws.
Aim! yel s Pa.
The lasso grabs Lugh’s leg. The roper yanks on it, brings him down.
Fire! yel s Pa.
We let fly. The arrows land short.
Load! Pa yel s agin.
The roper an another rider leap o a their horses. They ip Lugh onto his back. One sits on him. Th’other one yanks his arms over his head, ties his wrists together, then his ankles.
Stop! says Pa. Let him go!
We’re stil runnin. We take aim. One of the mounted riders turns. Sees us comin at ’em. He raises his bolt shooter. He fires.
Pa cries out. His arms fly up in the air.
Pa! I scream.
He staggers. He fal s.
Pa! I throw myself down beside him. The bolt’s gone right through his heart. I grab his shoulders, pul him up. His head flops forwards.
No! I shake him. No no no no no no no! Don’t do this, Pa! You cain’t die! Please don’t die!
I give him another shake. His head lol s back.
Pa, I whisper. I’m froze. I cain’t move. He’s dead. They’ve kil ed my pa.
A wild rage rises up in me. Red hot. Floodin me. Chokin me. I grab my crossbow. Leap to my feet an start runnin towards the men. As I run, I load my bow.
Aaaaaah! I scream. Aaaaaaah!
I take aim. I shoot. But the red hot’s makin my hands shake so much that I shoot wild. The arrow flies wide.
A shot comes whistlin at me. Sharp pain. Right hand. I cry out. My bow flies from my hand.
I keep runnin.
I burst past the horses, throw myself at the man tyin up Lugh. We rol on the ground, over an over. I kick at him, punch at him, screamin.
He pushes me o . He’s on his feet. Grabs my arm, hauls me up, slams me down. I land on my back. I gasp. Gasp. Cain’t breathe. Cain’t breathe. Cain’t git my breath.
Then. Then.
I pul myself to my feet an face ’em, swayin.
The four horsemen’s al down on the ground now. On foot. They surround Lugh. They don’t even look my way. It’s like I ain’t here. Like I don’t exist.
I hold my bleedin hand to my chest. Let him go, I says.
They don’t pay me no heed.
Lugh raises his head. Eyes wide. Face white. Terrified. Like I ain’t never seen him before.
I step closer. Take me with you, I says.
The one in charge jerks his head. They lift Lugh an sling him over one of the horses.
Please, I says. Please … take me with you. I won’t give you no trouble. Jest don’t leave me here without him.
They tie him to the horse. The rider holds the horse’s reins an jumps on behind one of th’other men. They start to move out in a swirl of red dust.
Lugh! I cry. I run alongside him. I gasp. Cain’t git a breath.
Lugh lifts his head. Our eyes meet. Lugh’s eyes. Blue as the summer sky. I grab his hands.
I’l find you, I says. Wherever they take you, I swear I’l find you.
No, he says. It’s too dangerous. Keep yerself safe. You an Emmi. Promise me you wil .
They grab Hob’s rope as they pass. They’re takin him too.
They break into a canter.
I cain’t keep up. My hand slides away from Lugh’s.
Promise me, Saba, Lugh says.
I keep runnin after ’em.
I’l find you! I scream.
They disappear into the red haze.
Lugh! I scream. Lugh! Come back!
My legs go out from unner me. I fal to my knees.
Emmi comes runnin out a the storm cel ar. She stops. Stares at the hazy red world. At Procter John, lyin next to the hut. Then she sees Pa.
Pa! she screams an goes runnin towards him.
I cain’t speak. Cain’t breathe.
Lugh’s gone.
Lugh’s gone.
Gone.
My golden heart is gone.
I kneel in the dust.
The tears rol down my face.
An a hard red rain starts to fal .
There’s a knife in my gut.
It twists, rips me open. With every heartbeat, it slides in a bit further. I cain’t feel such pain an live. I wrap my arms around my body, double over. My mouth opens in a silent scream.
I stay there a long time.
The rain don’t let up. Around me, the parched earth turns into a churnin sea of mud.
Look, Pa, it’s rainin.
Too late.
Nero flaps down an lands on my shoulder. Tugs at my hair.
I straighten up. Move slow. I’m numb. I don’t feel nuthin.
Git up. You got things to do.
My hand. I look at it. Seems like it’s a long ways o . Like it belongs to somebody else. The shot scraped the skin o in a long strip. It must hurt.
I stand. Make my feet move. Right. Left. So heavy. I wade through the mud to the shanty. Nero flies of to huddle unner the eaves.
Hand. Clean yer hand.
I pour water over it. Pack it with fireweed leaf an tie a cloth around it.
Pa’s dead. You got a burn him. Set his spirit free so’s it can journey back to the stars where it come from.
I look in the wood store. There ain’t enough to build a proper pyre. But I got a burn him.
Think. Think.
I find our lit le handcart. Wheel it towards the lake. Shove it through the mud til I come to where Emmi’s standin by Pa.
She’s got bare feet. She’s soaked to the skin. Her hair hangs in wet rat’s tails. They drip down her face, her neck.
She don’t move. Don’t look at me. She stares at nuthin.
I grab both her arms, give her a shake.
Pa’s dead, I says. We got a move him.
She leans over an retches into the mud. I wait til she’s nished. She looks at me sidewise, wipes a shaky hand across her mouth. She’s cryin.
Al right? I says. She nods. Take his feet, I says.
I take him unner his armpits an pul . Emmi takes his feet. Pa’s got skinnier the past six months. No rain fer so long meant food’s bin harder to find, pret y much impossible to grow.
You ain’t finished yer supper, Pa. Ain’t you hungry?
Oh, I’ve et plenty, child. Here. Share the rest out between yuz.
He knew he warn’t foolin us, but we al played along anyways.