You and Everything After

“I thought Chandra was your friend,” she says, her shoulders lifting faintly, a small signal to let me know she’s being honest. “I thought…I don’t know, that somehow...maybe she could help?”

“Paige,” I sigh, sitting back in my seat, “Chandra hates me. I’m her biggest threat on the team. Why would she help me?”

“Because…” she says, her eyes slowly moving from the tabletop directly in front of her, along the distance between us, until her gaze meets mine. “—because she dated him last year.”

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

My dad is already starting in with questioning. I know how his brain works. He wants to talk to Chandra, question her, see if she had a similar situation. Paige answers his barrage of questions with short one-word answers. They dated. He didn’t assault her. It’s different, though yes, inappropriate. But my dad wants to talk to her anyway…see if there’s a pattern of abuse, of anger, anything he can have in his hip pocket. It’s like I’m sitting in the middle of a pot of boiling water, bubbles bursting all around me, my skin on fire, everything poking and prodding to try to make me explode.

“I didn’t do anything to deserve this,” I say, standing up again and looking my dad in the eyes. I walk over to him and put my hand on his chest. “I love you, Daddy. I know you’re just trying to fix this. But I’m tired. I didn’t do anything wrong. Not once. And I’m just…I’m just done.”

Nobody stops me from leaving the table. Nobody follows me into my room. And nobody checks on me for the next hour. The space beyond my door is quiet, which means dinner is over and everyone either retreated to their spaces or went outside to talk about me more. I don’t care where they went or what they do, as long as I don’t have to be a part of it.

When my phone rings, my heart dances. Knowing it’s Ty makes my lips stretch into a smile for the first time in hours.

“Hey,” I answer, doing my best to sound less like a girl who just had her hope stolen from her chest and wrung out in front of her.

“Guess who got his Cookie back?” he asks, the giddiness in his voice making my smile stretch even larger.

“Thank the lord. Seriously, I don’t think I could endure another round of ransom embarrassment,” I say. “How’d you get him?”

“Rowe caved,” he says.

“Hmmmm, she…caved? That doesn’t sound very much like Rowe,” I say.

“What can I say, my charm won her over. She was no match,” he says. I close my eyes when he speaks, picturing him here, his voice deep, thick with Southern drawl. I imagine his face—I want to see his face. “Oh, she also told me I was an asshole for not inviting you to come home with me. So…”

I sit up when he says this. Seconds pass, and I start to worry over what to say in response when he finally fills the void for me.

“I really wish I did,” his voice no longer humorous. “I miss you like crazy.”

“God, I miss you too,” I say, pulling the sleeve of his shirt up to my face, breathing in deep and closing my eyes again. I can almost convince myself he’s here—his smell and his voice with me.

“You should know, I’m going to visit Kelly tomorrow,” he says, and just as fast he’s gone—a thousand miles away…with her.

“Oh,” I say. Small. Meek. Fragile.

“I don’t want you to…I don’t know…be jealous?” I’m embarrassed that he even says this. “I know it’s not easy to hear about her. I wouldn’t like you to have a Kelly.”

“Yeah, well, lucky for you, all I have is a Cotterman issue,” I say back, letting out a small, pathetic laugh.

“I don’t like that you have that, either,” he says, still serious.

“I know. Thank you,” I say.

“I’m going to show her your pictures. She wants to see what you look like. I’ve been talking about you—kind of a lot,” he says, and this time I blush in a good way.

“Saying good things, I hope?” I hold my breath.

“Well, I mean I did tell her that you don’t like Leo. She’s not too sure about that,” he says.

“Hey! I never said I don’t like Leo, I just haven’t been exposed enough,” I say, sitting up and gesturing like he’s really here. Ty has this effect; he brings my energy back, puts the life back in my veins.

“Okay, well…maybe you get a pass then. Kelly will agree with me on one thing, though,” he says.