Xander's Chance

As uneasy as he made her, he was good with his fans. Posing provocatively for pictures, signing books, small talk. She didn't think he was celebrity material before seeing him in action. She began to feel certain there was something beyond the façade of a vampire with a constant hard-on.

Her phone buzzed. Seeing Ashley's number, she answered.

"Hey, kid, what's up?" she asked.

"I broke up with my boyfriend."

"Oh, geez. What happened?"

"He said Maria was prettier and asked her out and she said yes. And I was like, but we are going out!"

"That's so lame," Jessi said. "I'm sorry, sweetie. Anything I can do?"

"I love him, Jessi."

"No, you didn't love him. He was a jerk anyway."

"You don't understand!" Ashley wailed.

Jessi grimaced, uncertain who was more high-maintenance: her seventeen-year-old cousin or the vampire making women swoon.

The one in front of him passed out. A store clerk rushed to help her. Xander glanced back at Jessi. He motioned her forward. She shook her head and turned her back to concentrate on listening to Ashley.

"Listen, sweetie," she interrupted. "I know you're upset, and I completely understand. I'm, uh, in the middle of work right now."

"Nobody cares how I feel!"

"I care. I'm right here." Jessi sighed. "I've been telling you for months he was a jackass. I think this is for the best. You can find a guy who treats you right. I mean, he thought you were overweight, and you're clearly gorgeous, Ashley. You deserve someone who appreciates you for who you are. Right?"

"Yeah." Ashley was quiet, sniffling, before she continued. "I guess he always was a little -"

The phone was snatched out of Jessi's hand. She whirled to see Xander place it to his ear and listen curiously.

"Give it back!" she mouthed the words and stretched for it. He twisted to keep her from reaching it. "Xander, I barely talked her out of crisis mode!"

"So you dumped him," Xander asked then listened. "Xander. Jessi is my personal assistant." Another pause. "Yes, from the exploding soufflé show." Pause. "He dumped you?"

Jessi covered her mouth, willing him not to say anything stupid to her delicate cousin.

"I disagree," he said. "Your cousin is considering dating a man she'd have to defend in a dark alley. You don't want that. You want someone who knows what he wants in a woman, knows how to please her and who appreciates your body. Love isn't a factor at your age or really at all, if you stop to think about how it's nothing more than a form of socially acceptable codependence."