When You Were Young

"That sounds lovely. I would be delighted." He takes the reins of the horse and walks beside her, telling her everything about himself. He grew up in a town along the southern coast until joining the Royal Navy on his sixteenth birthday. After his tour, he turned to merchant vessels bound for the Indies and once the Jamestown settlement in Virginia. "The New World is a beautiful place. I thought someday I might like to live there," he says. About ten years ago he moved to London and purchased his own ships, making a fortune in the process. He is on his way to Sussex to see an old friend about selling the business.

"Whyever would you do that?" she asks.

"I'm forty years old and tired of the sea. I want to try my hand at farming. Perhaps find a wife and have children." His eyes meet hers when he says this; she looks away so he can't see her blush.

Her parents are very kind to Mr. Gooddell when she introduces them. Rodney and her father discuss politics throughout dinner while Prudence stares down at her plate, though her stomach is far too nervous to eat anything. "Will you excuse me? I'm not feeling well all of the sudden," she says. She retreats to her bedroom, throwing herself onto the bed to cry.

"Is she all right?" she hears Rodney ask outside her door.

"You mustn't mind her, Mr. Gooddell. Prudence has a very sensitive constitution," Mother says.

"I would hate to think my presence has made her ill. Perhaps it would be better if I left."

"Nonsense. Prudence will be fine in the morning."

She can't sleep at all that night. Every time she closes her eyes, she thinks first of Rodney and then of him. Rodney couldn't want her; no one wanted her after what he had done. She carries his mark burned into her soul, branding her forever.

In the morning, Mother knocks on the door. "Prudence, come out and say goodbye to Mr. Gooddell," she says. Prudence says nothing. She refuses to get up from the bed. "I'm sorry," Mother says not to her but Mr. Gooddell. "She is a terribly spoiled child. Her father has been too lenient with her. She needs a proper whipping to straighten her out."

"She's a lovely young woman, Mrs. Chapman. Do tell her I said goodbye and I wish her all the best," Rodney says.

Prudence hears him go and then spends the rest of the day in bed, staring at the ceiling with tear-filled eyes. Rodney is gone. She won't ever see him again. This is for the best, she tells herself. He couldn't ever love someone like her, not after what he did to her.