When I'm With You

We make small talk for a minute before I drop the phone on the couch next to me and look back over at the portrait I had been working on. One of the many I have of the very man who’s caused me more pain than I thought possible. No matter how many times it happens, I’m still shocked when I see a picture-perfect likeness of Nate Reid filling a once-blank canvas. What’s sad is I don’t even realize I’m doing it. I just zone out and hours later … there he is.

Leaving everything where it is and ignoring the huge canvas of Nate, I walk from the back room and through the house so I can start getting ready for tonight. Bam’s nails click on the hardwood behind me as he follows. It’s been childish for me to skip these monthly dinners, I know that, but that doesn’t matter. The hurt he caused me years ago holds nothing on the pain he inflicted more recently. He was right that night I professed my true feelings for him when he said he would ruin me, but stupidly, I was too naïve to believe him then.

Pushing back the same hurt that ruin caused, I do what I have been doing for the last year and pretend it never happened.

When I pull up to the Reid’s house later that night, I curse myself for procrastinating leaving my house for so long. I spend so much time lost in my head that I’m almost always late, but since Maddi made such a big deal about me showing up tonight, I can only imagine that they’ve assumed I wasn’t coming again.

I park my car behind the many others that line their driveway and groan when I see my dad leaning against his truck. True to Maddi’s word, it looks like he was prepared to follow through with his threat.

Turning off the ignition, I fiddle with my phone and shoot Nikki a quick text to let her know I’m at a family dinner and I’ll call her later. We’ve made a habit recently by turning Wednesdays into our wine night, so if I don’t let her know I’m not home, she’s going to freak out. I’m always home, so it would be about as abnormal as it gets for me.

The second I reach the handle to open my door, it’s swung open and I let out a startled scream. My phone clatters to the driveway with a sickening sound that has me saying a prayer I didn’t just crack the screen.

“Cutting it close,” my dad says, bending over to pick up my phone and handing it over before stepping back so I can get out.

“Sorry,” I say with a shrug and lean up to give him a hug. He bends, meeting me halfway, and I instantly feel settled when he wraps his arms around me. Just like coming home. “I lost track of time. You know how it goes when I’m working.”

He leans back, giving me a kiss on my temple, and I get one of the rare smiles that he reserves just for ‘his girls.’ Eyes so like my own crinkle at the corners, and he just shakes his head.

“I’m here?” I continue, hoping to get off the hook from what I’m sure would end up being the third degree of questioning if he had his way.

“Yeah, sweetheart, you are. I’ve missed you,” he says, and I instantly feel guilty for not being around. It’s not his fault this is the last place I want to be.

“I missed you too, Dad.”

He turns, favoring his bad leg, and I frown. He just shakes his head. “Don’t even start, Emberlyn. Your mom’s already been on my ass for overdoing it this weekend.”

“Then maybe you should start listening to her before your ass is on the ground.”

“Sass,” he warns. “Just like your mom. Just like your sister. I’m surrounded by fucking sass.”

“Whatever.” I laugh, wrapping my arm around his waist as he pulls me to his side with one arm over my shoulders. “What did you do this time?”