Water Signs: A Story of Love and Renewal

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A cold autumn rain pounded the windows of Madeline's girlhood

bedroom as she awoke from another dream-filled sleep. It was hard to

believe almost three years had passed since her move to Florida, and even

harder to accept the circumstances of her current stay in Pennsylvania. In

spite of faithful weekly attendance at Mass, daily prayer, regular yoga

classes and constant reading and listening to motivational books and

tapes, those terrible episodes had dramatically increased in intensity and

scope. And while she'd done her absolute best to function in the world-

particularly given the fact that she was now a homeowner, no longer

could she calm herself down during the workday by simply breathing

deeply in the privacy of a restroom stall.

And when she began behaving strangely during her parents' last visit,

they'd insisted on bringing her back to Philly for tests to rule out the very

real possibility of a brain tumor, based on the oppressive headaches that

mimicked the overwhelming pressure of a vice and made it nearly

impossible for her to focus. Worse, she was now experiencing an even

more pronounced disassociation of her body and mind, causing her to

feel as if her feet weren't actually touching the ground, even when she

could plainly see that they were.

But most distressing was a new and chilling sensation she could only

describe to her father as a "tightening of my spine." During these

frequent and unpredictable moments, her legs and arms would suddenly

feel limp and lifeless, though still fully functional. This was preceded by a

palpable sensation of at the base of her neck, whereby she'd swear some

invisible "puppet master" was literally pulling her strings and forcing her

into submission. All of these symptoms were now accompanied by vivid

nightmares that typically featured disturbing images-from snake pits and

fire-breathing dragons to evil men in masks wielding AK-47's.

In last night's dream, Madeline was scaling a Cobra-infested mountain

in her bare feet, doing her best to avoid the venomous reptiles while she

struggled to make it to the top. Along the way she encountered several

people from real life including Mark, who wordlessly smiled as he

witnessed her impossible journey. He'd also been featured in previous

dreams, such as the one where he and Maddy held each other close

among the fallen leaves on a college campus, listening to the church bells

ring in the distance.

Still another showcased Mark's mom-a woman Madeline had never

met-encouraging her not to give up on her son "because I know he

loves you." Oddly enough, that particular dream took place by the side of

a crystal-clear river; usually the water featured in these nocturnal mind

movies was murky and dark. And yet, prior to her arrival back in Philly,

her only relief from the madness came from completely submerging

herself in the ocean or pool. Surrounded on all sides by the earth's purest

substance, she experienced wholeness and peace, at least temporarily.

Monica Rose entered her daughter's bedroom, consumed with fear

and worry for what might lay ahead. Though she'd seen Maddy at low

points before, none had come close to what she was now experiencing.

The emptiness of her expression, the lost look in her eyes and the

seriousness of her physical symptoms combined to fill the devoted

mother's heart with anguish. Why did it seem her daughter was always getting the

short end of the stick? What were they going to do if Maddy was suffering from a

mental disorder? Of all horrific problems, Monica felt least prepared to deal

with that possibility.

Madeline smiled as her mom climbed into bed with her, recalling

countless memories of growing up, when the two of them would linger

for a few minutes prior to Maddy having to get ready for school.

"How are you sweetie?" Monica asked.

"I'm fine," Maddy replied softly.

"God, Maddy, I just don't want there to be anything wrong with your

mind," Mrs. Rose blurted out emotionally. "I couldn't take it if something

like that were to happen to you. You're my baby!" She pulled her child

close to her as she spoke and kissed her on the forehead. Madeline

wordlessly held her arms around her mother as she said a silent prayer for

help and wondered when this nightmare was finally going to end.