Waiting on the Sidelines

He just smiled, looking out the window and checking his mirrors as we pulled into the old barn house that was decorated for the homecoming dance. It was a tradition, one we’d kept up for 40 years. The homecoming dance was always held at Winter’s Barn, which was really only used for special events now. Years ago, it was a working barn and students had to dance among penned animals. This smell was definitely preferred.

Before we got out of the car, Tyler turned to me, scrunching his face a little like he was thinking. “So, there’s this party later tonight. It’s by my school, with a lot of my friends. No desert,” he joked. “Anyhow, I was wondering… do you think you’d be up to going after the dance?”

I was a little off guard. I thought about it, and it entirely depended on the direction my evening went. I decided to leave it open. “Maybe. I’d like to, but maybe ask me after the dance? You know… in case I’m beat.”

There, that was good. He just smiled and nodded an ok.

We walked up to the door the same time as Sarah and Jax and we all went inside together. Everything was perfect. The seniors always get to decorate for the dance. They had strung white lights everywhere and lined the entrance with a twisted arch of black and white balloons. There were fiber strings dangling from the ceiling, too, making it look like sparkling stars were hovering above. Each table had a small, simple candle and white table cloths. The white chairs were tied with giant black ribbons. It was exactly as I’d want my wedding to be, I thought, minus the balloons.

I took Tyler’s arm and we followed Sarah to a table near Sean and Becky, who were adorably matched, her gray dress complementing his gray shirt and silver tie. “Woah, what a fox,” Becky joked, flitting up my skirt a little.

“Thanks,” I smiled, my eyes squinting as I shielded myself from the burning attention.

Sean walked over and gave me a small kiss on the cheek, whispering in my ear “you look amazing, Noles.” I just smiled back at him and touched his cheek. He was a good one.

Before he left, I grabbed his arm and made an urgent face. He knew what it meant. “Yeah, he’s here. He brought Stephanie. They’re sitting with us,” he cowered a little, afraid of how I would take it. I just nodded and said “OK.”

I put my purse down and decided to lead Tyler out to the dance floor. It was a nice slow song, so I put my cheek flat against his shoulder and tucked my hand underneath. We rocked back and forth slowly and I felt his fingertips glide up and down my bare back. It was soothing, somewhat. But whereas it may have possibly lit my body with desire a few days ago, it only lulled me into a feeling of sleepiness tonight.

My eyes wandered around the room, searching for Reed. I knew that my heart would both soar and sink the second I found him, but I had to find him anyhow. He was my drug. I saw Stephanie first. She had on a skin-tight pink dress that hitched way up on her thighs and her golden hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail with layers of curls. My eyes caught her wrist as it dangled over Reed’s shoulder. She was wearing a delicate white corsage, mostly baby’s breath. It was feminine and subtle. Exactly the type of thing Reed liked, I thought.

Reed’s back was to me, which gave me time on my own to take him in. He was wearing a formal, fitted sweater, mostly black. I could see the hints of the gray and light blue argyle pattern on the front as he was slowly turning. His straight, black pants were tight on his muscles and melted into his black shoes. He looked like a GQ ad, his hair smoothed back, but still curled a bit on the ends. I could only imagine what this dark look did to his bright green eyes.

I tucked my chin in more to Tyler’s chest as we turned, hiding my gaze from Reed, hoping he wouldn’t see me watching. His eyes were looking out over the crowd, his interest clearly not in his date. This made my insides warm over.

Finally, he spotted me. I lifted my face a small bit to acknowledge that I was looking, too. Our eyes were locked on each other as we both turned slowly, almost as if we were dancing with one another despite being in strangers’ arms. Reed never smiled. Not once. But he also never wavered, holding me in his gaze until the song ended. I watched him walk over to the table and sit in a chair next to Sean while Stephanie went to greet some of her friends, his stare continuing to focus on me while I stayed on the dance floor.

Tyler and I remained out there for another song and then he led me back to our table before he left to find a restroom. My back was to Reed as I sat next to Sarah and Jax, listening to Sarah talk loudly about how the DJs at the school dances never play hard enough music. I feigned listening to her, nodding and smiling some as I looked sideways, but I knew Reed was still watching.