Waiting on the Sidelines

I knew my parents were barely sleeping. I knew that they were waiting for Tyler to leave. If I could just hold out a few minutes in my room, I was pretty sure they would think I had truly gone to bed. I shut out all of the lights, locked the front door (I would go out the back) and made my way to my room where I even went so far as to change into my baggy sweat pants and giant Coolidge football shirt that I had stolen from Mike years ago.

With the lights off, I sat with my knees up to my chest in the far corner of my bed and dialed Reed on my phone. My chest beat rapidly and sped up with each unanswered ring until finally Sarah answered. She was whispering.

“Noles?” she asked.

“Yeah, it’s me,” I just waited. Not sure how to make my next move.

“Did you listen to my message,” she was still whispering.

“Yeah, I got it. I’m trying to wait out my parents and then I’ll sneak out the back… why are you whispering?” I was curious. I could hear the party still raging behind her.

“I don’t want Reed to hear me. He keeps asking about his phone. He thinks he lost it. Of course, then he forgets about it and five minutes later he asks where his phone is,” her frustration coming through in her tone. Sadly, I could imagine how Reed looked. The time he lambasted me in front of everyone drunk was still scorched in my mind, and the way he looked and sounded was hard to erase.

“How bad?” I asked, not sure if I really wanted to know.

“Pretty bad. Like way worse than I have ever been, and you’ve seen me at my worst, girl,” she added. She was right. I was the pro at curing Sarah’s hangovers. She’s been getting lit up since 8th grade. The product of very loose parenting.

We sat on the phone silent for a long time. When I finally felt like I could make my move, I let out a heavy sigh. “Sarah, I don’t know if I can do this,” I admitted.

She sighed back. “I know. But Noles?” she was still whispering.

“Yeah?” I responded.

“You have to. You’re the only one. And you know it,” she said. She was right. I was. And I knew it. Whatever this stupid torture dance was that Reed and I were doing with each other, it was still very much about us. I couldn’t understand why he was pulling me close but then pushing me away. It was killing me. And there was Tyler, who was…unexpected. Part of me felt like I deserved Tyler. But that same part of me was also angry. And I didn’t know if that was the right reason to be with him.

I hung up with Sarah and managed to silently escape my room. I made it look like I was in bed, but barely. I didn’t really want it to look like I was trying to pull of a hokey sneak-out, which was exactly what I was doing.

I backed out my car slowly, leaving the lights off until I got to the main road. When I made it to the turn off for the desert party, I felt a swift sense of terror. I was scared. Not for me, but for Reed. I had this sick feeling that I was late, but I was also dreading seeing him in this condition.

Parking my car on the other side of some of the brush around the tables to keep it out of sight, I turned the engine off, killed the lights and hit the call button to find Sarah. I ended the call instantly, though, when I saw him standing on the roof of the black Mustang. His shirt was off, tucked into the back of his jeans and hanging behind him. The tops of his plaid boxers were peeking out from the waist of his jeans, his stupid perfect abs on display for the girls who were fawning over them. His hat was on backwards and he was singing something at the top of his lungs, his words not really making sense.

He stilled when he saw me. Thank god Sarah spotted me first. She rushed over to me and shoved his phone in my pocket, leaning my ear to her. “He just started asking for you again, so good timing, chica,” she winked, trying to bring levity.

“Great,” I smirked, rolling my eyes a little. I sucked in a deep breath as Reed was climbing from the top of the car and winding his way to me on his unsteady legs. His swagger was faulty when he was like this. When he finally stopped to stand a few feet in front of me, he bent down to take a bow and then looked back up with a smile.

“You came,” he had a huge grin, but immediately it turned to a frown. “He’s not here, is he? Are you mad at me?”

His thoughts were everywhere. How the hell was I going to get him home? Pursing my lips, I nodded once and decided I was going to have to be tough to get through this. “Reed, it’s time to go home,” I said politely but firmly.

Unfortunately, he started pouting. “Oh, come on. Don’t you want to stay and party with me and my friends?” he asked, waving his hands in all directions at the rest of the drunk teenagers littered through the campsite.