Waiting on the Sidelines

“Yep,” I said, swinging my legs, too, and staring off at the same distance, taking another sip of my lemonade and wanting to crawl under the porch and die.

“That’s…” he started, then stopped turning to angle towards me a little. He tapped his forearm against my knee, forcing me to look up. “That’s really sweet.”

I just let my eyebrows raise and nodded, shrugging a little, clearly admitting how embarrassed I was. “Thanks, I guess,” that’s all I could say.

Like a gift, my mom’s car pulled around from the main road onto our stretch. I stood up and stepped down the stairs just a little, Reed joining me.

My mom pulled into the carport right behind my dad’s truck and got out of her car, my dad coming over to grab a few bags from her with some extra groceries. She walked up the path to the porch steps and smiled at Reed before leaning in to kiss my cheek. “Hi, Reed. So nice of you to join us,” she said reaching out to shake his hand. “Come on in, guys. Food will be served in just a few minutes.”

My mom was such a confident woman. I envied her and looked up to her for that. I hoped that my confidence would grow to be more like hers someday. I held the door for Reed as we walked inside, but he took it from my hand and gestured his hand forward, insisting I go inside first.

“Why thank you, sir,” I said, in a sort of British accent.

He laughed a little and then said, “Don’t expect me to call you lady, Noles.”

Dinner was amazingly good. My mom had picked up French bread and toasted it with garlic and butter for a side. Reed seemed to be in heaven as he had thirds. By the time I was walking him out the door at 6:30 he was rubbing his belly and complaining that he needed a nap.

“You should see us on Thanksgiving,” I said. “It’s quite the feast.”

He just smiled and then kicked a driveway stone at my feet. “I bet. I’d like to see that…tell your mom to save me a place. Or leftovers. Or leftovers of anything she makes. Like, uh…ever,” he joked, smiling and rubbing his satisfied belly one more time.

I walked him over to his Jeep and then waited while he opened the door and sat sideways on the seat, facing me, biting his bottom lip just a bit. Suddenly, I remembered something and ran back to the house.

“One minute,” I said.

“Uh, ok,” he said, puzzled by my bizarre behavior. Since when wasn’t I bizarre, I thought.

I ran back out seconds later, holding his hat that he let me wear for the ride home. “Here, can’t let you forget this. It’s a far superior school, you know,” I joked. ASU and UofA were rivals, and I had my heart set on ASU ever since I went to a Sun Devil football game with my dad and brother when I was in third grade. Of course, that’s before I knew about the Reed Johnson path. That might have me rethinking everything. Yeah, throw your life dreams away for a boy, I laughed inwardly.

“Hey, thanks. I have to keep it in the Jeep. Can’t let my dad see it,” he winked and flipped the hat on his head backwards, smooshing down the waves and curls of his hair, letting them poke out the sides and back just a bit.

“So, see you in the morning I guess,” I said, trying to break the uncomfortable silence that kept creeping in between us. He was back to biting his bottom lip.

“Yep, I’ll be here at 5. You better be ready, I know how you like to sleep in late,” he said sarcastically.

“Ha, that’s a good one, Mr. Johnson. Say, maybe tomorrow you can take a shower before you crawl out of bed,” I winked right back.

Reed just laughed a little and looked down, quietly speaking. “I had to rescue some damsel in distress,” he smiled.

“Yeah, you did. Sorry about that. But she’s REALLLLLY grateful,” I said.

“Anytime,” he said, swinging his hand into mine for just the briefest touch. It was like it sent fire through my fingers and veins.

He pulled his door closed and leaned his arm out the window some, starting up his engine. I just waved and turned on my feet to head back inside. I was only a few steps away when he called my name.

“Hey, Nolan?” he spoke. I turned to look him in the eyes.

“Yeah, what’s up? Need some leftovers to take home,” I said, trying to be clever. Always trying to be clever.

He curled his left side of his lip up and shook his head. “Nah, I’m good. Probably for hours,” he smiled, then dropped his face into a more serious expression. “No, I just wanted to say sorry again. I know you’re sick of hearing it, but I am so very sorry. I shouldn’t have been with someone like that. Someone that could do that to someone like you.”