Until You (Fall Away #1.5)

Shit, baby. Now, now, now…

I couldn’t f**king take it anymore. It could’ve been the heels, her body, or the way she blew my mind just being herself, but I was done for.

Grabbing the condom, I tore open the wrapper and slipped the sucker on, not taking an eye off of her.

Pulling her close, I crushed her body with mine, feeling her hot, na**d skin melting into mine.

She broke contact and whispered in my ear. “My turn.”

What?

My eyes widened, not sure what she meant until she pushed my back on the bed and came down to straddle on top of me.

My dick was pressed to her warm, wet opening, and I squeezed her hips, almost growling.

“You’re perfect. Perfect for me,” I said, feeling the soft, sexy skin in my hands.

Goddammit, I needed her. Now.

Her blonde hair spilled around her, and she was an animal, looking at me like she knew exactly how to kill me.

Lifting up, she slowly came down as I guided my c**k inside of her. She was so small that we needed help, and I had no problem with that.

Pleasure swept over me like a wave of heat as I laid back and felt her warmth coat me. I put a hand on her breast and another on her hip, touching and guiding.

“Tell me you like it, Tate.” I had to know that she loved this. That she was going to come back for more.

That she was my girlfriend.

I never wanted to give anyone that title, because I thought I wouldn’t be able to make the commitment.

That wasn’t it.

I already had a girlfriend. All along, even though we were enemies, no one could take Tate’s place.

Tell me, baby. Say it.

“I…” she gasped as she moved her h*ps in a wild, you-better-do-that-all-damn-night motion that had me breathing hard.

I jerked my h*ps up, pushing deeper inside of her. “Say it.”

Her eyebrows pinched together in the good kind of pain as she stumbled over the words. “I love it.” She smiled. “I love it with you.”

I shot up and wrapped my arms around her back and buried my face in her chest, taking a firm breast in my mouth.

“You taste like candy,” I whispered against her skin as I dragged out a nipple between my teeth. “You’re not getting any f**king sleep tonight, Tatum Brandt. You know that, right?”

“Do you?” she shot back, taking my face in her hands.

Such a handful.

“There’s something I didn’t tell you last week when…when we were in your room.”

We laid underneath the covers, na**d and happily exhausted, staring up at the ceiling.

I caressed her arm as she rested her head under my chin.

I didn’t want to disturb this perfect calm, but it was time.

Telling the truth is like lying. Once you do it, it becomes easier.

“What?” Her voice was raspy, and I didn’t know if it was a lion ripping at my stomach or a rhino stomping around my chest, but I was nervous.

“I left my brother at my dad’s house. I ran out of there without him,” I confessed.

She arched her neck back to peer up at me. “Jared, I know. You told me that part. That you tried to get him to leave, but he wouldn’t.”

I nodded. “I didn’t tell you everything, though. The day I ran out, my father had forced me into the basement to help my brother. With what, I didn’t know, but when I got down there, I saw…” The bile started forcing its way up my throat, so I concentrated on my breathing. “I saw my dad’s girlfriend and his friend dead on the basement floor.”

She popped up and stared down at me with pinched eyebrows. “Dead?”

“Come back here.” I pulled her back down, but she propped up her arm in the bed and rested her head on her balled up fist instead.

I guess she wanted eye contact.

“Yeah, as far as I could tell with the f**king distance I kept. Jax was sitting against the far wall, holding his knees against his chest and staring at nothing. He didn’t look scared or angry, just like he was a little confused or something.” I narrowed my eyes, trying to imagine what could have been going through his head.

“How do you know they were dead?” she asked softly and swallowed.

“There was blood. They weren’t moving.” I shook the images from my head. “Anyway, I couldn’t get Jax to wake up, so to speak. He just sat there and would only say that he was fine, and that we had to clean up the mess. It was like he didn’t even know it was me in the room.”

Tate looked at me, concern in her eyes, and I hoped she understood.

“You feel guilty.” She figured me out.

“Yeah,” I admitted. “It was unbearable, being in that house. Being in that basement. Why wouldn’t he come with me?” I asked more to myself than Tate.

“Have you asked him?”

“Once.” I caressed her hair. “He doesn’t remember, he says.”

“What do you think happened down there?” She asked the question I’d been asking myself for years. My father wasn’t arrested for murder. I don’t even know if the police found bodies when I got home and reported my brother’s abuse.

I thought for a minute, afraid to admit out loud what I knew was ridiculous to suspect.

“I think two lowlifes got exactly what they deserved.”

Chapter 35

“Are you sore at all?” I whispered into her hair as we walked into school Monday morning.

Her breathing hitched, and I could hear the smile in her voice. “A little.”

“Good,” I mumbled and hooked my arm around her neck, pulling her in.

I’d taken her back to her house on Saturday night, after Homecoming, and punished her for keeping me at arm’s length all damn week by keeping her up all damn night.

After spending Sunday with my brother and not being able to talk to Tate—because I’d stupidly left my phone at the Beckman party, and it was stolen—I’d crept into her room last night and fallen asleep with her in my arms.

But I woke her up early. We were both half asleep, but it was still hot.

She rolled her eyes at me. “You’re such an ego-maniac,” she complained.

I looked down at her, grinning. “And you love it.”

“Do not,” she pouted, and I put my lips to her forehead.

Yes, you do.

I sighed. “Then I’ll change,” I promised.

“Damn right you will.”

She stopped at her locker, but I stayed behind her, holding her hips. I was becoming a big-pile-of-whipped, but I couldn’t not touch her when she was close.

People had been looking at us during the past week. Used to seeing us as enemies and me never with my hands on a girl in public, they seemed pretty confused.

But instead of shying away and putting on my tough guy face, I gave them all the middle finger.

Well, figuratively.

Looking down the row, I saw Piper and Nate with their heads together, and then they turned to eyeball me.

My stomach rolled, not because I couldn’t handle either of them, but I didn’t want Tate to even register their presence.

She was going to be happy…or else.

Nate looked amused, even with the remnants of the black eye I’d given him weeks ago, while Piper scrunched up her lips like she was disgusted. Her eyes were angry, though, and unease nestled into the back of my brain.

Great.

I was sure I’d be in for a confrontation before the end of the day.

“Alright.” Tate turned around and hugged her books. “I’m off. Are you walking me?”

“No, I have to get my ass to the counselor’s office, actually.”

Saying the word counselor had me wanting to upchuck, but it was required for all Seniors.

“Ah, the what-are-your-future-plans? talk ,” she teased while nodding her head.

I almost let out a laugh with the way my heart jumped. “The only future plans I have are taking you to see a concert over Thanksgiving,” I said quietly as I pulled two tickets out of my pocket.

“Oh!” Her eyes widened, and she snatched the tickets out of my hand. “You didn’t! Avenged Sevenfold!”

“Belated birthday present,” I explained. “I was waiting for them to go on sale.” A grin tickled my jaw as I tried to hold it back. “You like Avenged Sevenfold, right?”

As much time as Tate and I had spent apart, I still had to remind myself that there was stuff I may not know about her anymore.

She looked at me like I had three heads. “Like Avenged Sevenfold?” She held out her arms for me to see the black T-shirt—the Avenged Sevenfold T-shirt— she wore under her little, black cardigan. “M. Shadows is my everything,” she teased.

“Hey.” I partially scowled and partially smiled, pulling her into me. She let out a raspy laugh.

“Thank you,” she whispered into my lips, pulling me in.

“You can thank me more later.”

Pulling back, she playfully shoved my chest away. “Go. Go to your appointment and make plans for a New York college.”

I barely had time to roll my eyes before she turned around and walked down the hall.

“So your grades look good. Not great but enough to get into a good school.” Ms. Varner opened a file folder—my folder—and regurgitated the same conversation she’d no doubt spewed at the other three hundred seniors she’d talked to this month.

I sat there, arms at ease on the arm rests with one ankle resting on the other knee. The air in the room was thick, but I stayed because the principal would harass the students who made these meetings difficult. I sat, I stayed, and I would get out as easily as possible.

“What colleges are you considering?” she asked, looking at me with concern.

“Undecided.” I barely unclenched my teeth for my usual one-word answers.

Her eyes narrowed, and she studied me for a moment before pulling a packet out of the folder.

“Are you interested in seeing what the career test said about you?” she asked without even looking at me.

“No.”

“It said,” she continued as if I’d said nothing, “that you have strengths in leadership.”

What the…?

“Like a coach?” I blurted out.

Me and sports? Me working in a school for the rest of my life earning shit pay. Yeah, that’d be a whole f**king waste of a life.

She covered her smile with her hand. “No,” her voice cracked with a laugh. “Like the military or politics.”

Like West Point, Mr. Brandt’s voice came back to haunt me.

No, maybe owning my own shop someday or running races, but not driving tanks or flying jets…

Wait…

“Yeah, okay.” I shook off the images of me in a cockpit. “I’ll think about it.” I stood up to leave with no intention of thinking about it.

“Jared,” she called, and I stopped. “The test also says you’re a protector, a nurturer...” she trailed off as my eyes widened.

What the f**k?

“You might want to consider careers in health care or youth guidance.” And she looked down, almost embarrassed.

Youth guidance?

My face probably looked like someone just told me I was born from wolves. When I looked at her, I saw a crazy lady.

“Get your test checked,” I grumbled and walked out the door.

A f**king youth guidance pilot?

And she makes money at that job?

My head was all over the place now, and I’d lost the calm from this morning. Usually my brain was like a warehouse. Take one box, open it, deal with it, and put it away before I deal with another box. Now all the goddamn boxes were open at the same time.

Was it so wrong to just want Tate on the back of my motorcycle forever and not want anything else?

I marched through the front office and yanked open the door leading out.

“Jared!” I heard my name yelled—no, bellowed—off to my left and turned to see Madoc stomping towards me.