Torn from You (Tear Asunder #1)

Crisis put his hand to his chest and staggered backward. “Ohhh, wounded.”

Deck shook his head back and forth then urged me ahead of him into the backyard. My head was still spinning, and I couldn’t get a handle on what Deck had told me. What was Logan hiding? Obviously, Deck thought it was important enough to push the issue.

The small backyard had a patio table and chairs with a gaudy orange, yellow and purple umbrella, a BBQ and a rock garden along the edge of the back fence. Georgie called it her postage stamp backyard, but for the city it was a good size.

When Georgie saw me, she squealed and ran over and hugged me. “Hey, Eme.” She lowered her voice. “Oh my God, you should’ve seen Ream and Kat last night. Talk about a chemistry experiment gone wrong.”

I raised my brows. Wow. Kat hadn’t mentioned anything.

“Come meet Raven.” Georgie pulled me to a girl sitting at the table with an untouched orange juice in front of her. From behind she looked frail, thin shoulders slouched forward as if she was trying to hide, and her hair hung in waves down her back. “Raven, this is Emily.”

Raven lifted her head and our gazes locked.

I gasped. It was her. Kai’s girl. That vacant look was something I’d never forget. I stood staring, and then I stared some more until Georgie nudged me, and I held out my hand.

“Hi, ah, Raven. Nice to meet you.” I wasn’t certain what to say really. I was so shocked the girl was here that I fumbled over my words.

The girl shook my hand, if you could call it a shake. It was more like she touched my hand. By the way her eyes widened, I knew she recognized me too.

I glanced over at Deck. He gave a subtle nod, and that’s when I knew. He had gotten her out. Had Logan asked him to? When had it gone down? It had been two years since I’d seen her.

The screen door slammed, and Raven jumped. By the way she looked and reacted, my guess was she hadn’t been rescued for very long. It was also bizarre she was here instead of with her family and friends.

Georgie’s mom Karen came out and smiled when she saw me. I met Karen when I started working at Georgie’s coffee shop a couple months before I met Logan. “Sweetie. Come give me a hug. We never see you anymore since you moved out to the farm.” She squished me to her bosom then kissed my forehead. She lowered her voice and whispered in my ear. “You look better, sweetie. But still tired. You getting enough sleep? Do you need anything?”

Georgie’s mom was the closest I had to a mother, and I suspected Georgie had told her about my mom being a bitch and thankfully out of my life.

“Deck,” she yelled, “get Emily a drink.” She lowered her voice. “Men these days, all macho and no gallantry. What happened to the James Stewarts of the world.” Karen was into classic movies.

I wasn’t going to tell her that Deck was better than James. All sweet was out; hot and scary with a teaspoon of sweet was in. Deck had that. Damn, Logan had that.

Deck poured me a glass of orange juice, passed it to me then slid into the seat across from Raven. She looked ready to bolt at the sight of him, although I noticed her eyes never directly looked at him. Instead, she kept her head down and her hands on the edge of the chair as if ready to push off and run at any second.

Deck sighed then glanced over Raven’s head to Georgie. Georgie put her hand on Raven’s forearm and crouched down quietly talking to her.

“Hey, Emily. I’m Ream.” Oh wow. No wonder Kat didn’t want to come today. Ream was here, and he was super-hot. He sat beside Deck, legs outstretched, hand casually turning his—beer.

I remembered Logan telling me that Ream and Crisis had been friends with Deck and Georgie before they even hooked up with Logan and Kite.

Ream looked at Deck. “Sculpt coming by?”

He nodded.

Deck glanced at me, eyes narrowed and his face pensive. Damn, the guy could send a girl to her knees with that look—except Georgie. I took a sip of my juice. When I glanced back at Deck he was still watching me.

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair.

Raven shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

Karen broke the silence. “Deck, you ask my daughter out yet?” That unhinged the stare, and he looked at Karen and there was a hint of a smile on her face.

Crisis opened the barbecue lid and checked the bacon. “So what the shit, Emily? Where were you last night?”

“Cussing in front of the girls. No gallantry. If Georgie’s father were here right now, he’d cuff you to the bumper of his car and drag you ten miles.”

“Fuck, I love your mom, Georgie,” Crisis said.

Deck may have smirked, but it was more of a grunt.

Karen left before brunch was served, claiming she had to get home and feed the dog. Anyone who knew Karen, knew she was going home to her husband Frank who was usually gardening on a Sunday and she liked to be with him. When I met them, I instantly saw the love they had for one another. And now that I knew they’d lost their son ... it was nice they had one another to depend on after something so tragic.

We ate bacon, scrambled eggs and hash browns. Well, most of us ate; Raven picked at hers. I knew the shit that had gone down with her was really bad. Alfonzo was immoral, corrupt and cruel, and she’d been trained by him to be a sex slave.

Crisis did most of the talking, and the conversation was kept light, away from me, and nothing was mentioned about Logan, although I was constantly on edge waiting for him to come by. Wondering if he still was. Hoping he was, and yet praying he wasn’t. Then wondering why it was taking him so long to get here. It was perpetual anxiety.

The gate clanged.

I didn’t have to turn to know who was behind me as goose bumps sped across my skin. My belly dropped as I slowly turned and locked eyes with him. God, he was magnetic. There wasn’t a flicker of uncertainty in him, and it was unnerving and ... attractive. Yes, Logan was attractive as hell standing there watching me as if he was going to eat me alive with his desire.

“Hey, man. What’s up?” Crisis said, then looked at me and hit his head with the palm of his hand. “Of course.”

Logan was moving. I heard mumblings from Ream telling Crisis he was an ass.

I stood, so did Georgie and Ream.

There was determination in his stride as if nothing could stop him from reaching me, and it sent my pulse racing.

Logan stopped in front of me. Paused for a second. Then hooked his arm around my waist and dragged me up against his chest. His warm body sunk into me, and I could feel his chest rising and falling as he kept me locked to him.

“Mouse.” His whispered word dripped like honey across my mind, and I had a hard time not melting into him and ignoring the warning beacons. “We need some privacy. You good with that, Eme?”

Was I? Georgie took my hand and squeezed. “I specifically recall not inviting you, Logan. I told you last night, Emily was coming and it wasn’t a good idea.”

“Georgie,” Deck said. “Leave it.”

Georgie ignored Deck and looked at me. “You okay with this?”

I hesitated then nodded.

“We’ll be back in ten.” Logan tagged my hand and pulled me outside the gate and down the alley to the front of the house where he put me up against the wall and leaned into me. I wondered if he did it on purpose as the memory of him kissing me outside the Brazen Head restaurant hit me full force. I’d loved him then. I trusted him.

Logan slid his finger across my temple, down the side of my face to the curve of my neck where he stopped. “I wish we had more time together, Eme. I tried to get here earlier, but Matt had a lot to say.”

I could imagine after the fight Logan started last night.

I stood against the wall; his fingers splayed on my neck, and with every word he spoke a breath of him swept into my ear. I ached. I wanted him, and yet, me giving him myself was all that I’d left behind. I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t be that girl again.

“Give me your cell number, Mouse.”

“No.”

His body stiffened, and the rhythmic motion of his thumb stopped. I felt every muscle flex, and there was a coldness that invaded my body as my words hit him.

“Emily.”

“It’s not a good idea.”

“Sure it is.” His warm breath caressed across my cheek as he leaned into me. “Jesus. Why won't you look at me?”

I did and regretted it because my belly dropped. “Is your mother okay, Sculpt?”

He seemed to relax at the mention of her. “She’s good.”

I sighed and nodded. I couldn’t imagine what his mother must have gone through living with Raul then being pregnant with Logan and raising a child in that place. Deck was right, that place was Logan and his mother’s nightmare. And he’d willingly walked back into it.

He moved in closer. “Deck and his men took the place down a few months after you left, Eme. Raul escaped and went underground. Deck found him recently.”

“A few months? What took so long, Sculpt? Why did you stay there?”

“You saw the place. It was well guarded. After you got out, Raul knew something was up and doubled his security. Took Deck some time to get organized and enough men to take out the compound.”

“Where were you? After I got out, what happened, Sculpt? Did you stay to fight for Raul?”

It was rare Logan avoided my eyes, but he did, and I knew instantly he wasn’t going to tell me. Another reason why I couldn’t trust him.

“Raul is dead. We leave the rest out of our lives.” He tilted my head up so I was looking directly at him. “Emily, you mean more to me than anything. I love you. I want to be with you ... Help you get through this. Baby, I missed you so much.”

I pushed on his chest, but he didn’t to budge, so instead I pounded my fists into him. “No. You can’t do that. You can’t tell me you love me and you missed me and think it’ll make it all better. That I’ll forgive you.”

He remained stiff and unmovable. “I don’t need your forgiveness. I did it so you’d stay alive, and if that meant I had to watch you suffer or make you fear me then that’s what would happen.” His hand went to the back of my head, and his fingers weaved into my hair. “You know why? Because I knew one day I’d get you out and it would all be worth it.”

“You brought me into that. You. It’s your fault.” But I knew it wasn’t his fault. Raul was the only one responsible; Logan just happened to be his son.

“Mouse.” His hand tightened in my hair and he put his hand under my chin, to urge me to look up at him.

Oh God, he’d see the watery depths, and I didn’t want him to.

“Yeah it’s my fault he got to you. He saw me with you and knew you were my weakness. I have to live with that. But the rest ... I’d do it again. It’d kill me, but without hesitation I would. Because you’re standing here in front of me.” His voice lowered. “Every single time I’ve touched you it was real.”

“I loved you. You used that against me,” I whispered in a ragged voice.

“No. I used it to save you.” His voice was quiet and steady.