The Vampire Who Played Dead

So how does one hide a crossbow in plain site?

Very carefully. The crossbow in question was smaller than most, designed to shoot shorter bolts. It had come into my possession last month after I had dealt with an author who not only wrote about the undead, but was also one of them. Method acting, as my theater friends would call it. Method writing, perhaps?

So I grabbed the emergency blanket I always kept folded on the back seat and wrapped it around the crossbow. At least no one would be calling the cops on the crazy guy walking up to the mansion carrying a medieval weapon.

At the door, I took in some air, listened to the all-pervasive silence, and then rapped loudly on the frosted glass.

I gripped the crossbow under the blanket while I waited.

Did I come here to kill a vampire? Hell, no. Was I protecting myself in case something very strange was going on? Hell, yes. And things only seemed to be getting stranger by the minute.

I heard footsteps well before anyone got to the door. That's what happens when you have a massive home covered in polished marble flooring. The footsteps grew louder, appearing just behind the door, where they paused. No doubt I was being peeped at through the peep hole. I must have passed the peep test because a moment later the door clicked open.

"Mt. Spinoza," said Mrs. Perkins. She tried to sound surprised but I knew a fake surprise when I heard one. A sort of unnatural rise in octave. Prior to life as a private eye, I had spent years investigating insurance claims - and frauds, too. I knew bullshit when I heard it. "What brings you back here?" she asked.

"I'd like to speak with you inside," I said, "if you wouldn't mind."

Her eyes briefly darted up...up to where I knew a woman was hiding - and with this being daylight - no doubt sleeping. Her gaze settled back on me and she nodded reluctantly. "Okay, but please be quick about it. I have...some errands to run."

I said I would, and she let me inside. I followed behind her, my blanketed arm behind my back. For now, she hadn't noticed it.

She led me deeper into the mansion.