The True Meaning of Smekday (Smek 1)

“That’s it,” I said finally. “We have to tell someone about our telecloner, and soon.”

“Tipmom will be told, yes?”

“I…don’t know. I want to, of course, but she seems really into this Dan Landry. And he seems kind of into the Gorg. No. I’m going to go to him first. If I can convince him that the Gorg are bad news, he’ll be a good guy to know. The whole state is talking about him.”

Mom knocked “I’m a Little Teapot” and came inside.

“I thought I said stay here,” she said to me. “Is this how it’s still gonna be? I’m trying a lot harder here, Turtlebear.”

“It couldn’t be helped,” I said. “I swear. This Hoegaarden woman was going to push her way in. She would’ve seen Pig. We have to get a lock. And hinges.”

“Well…I’m going to say something to Mrs. Hoegaarden. She should have talked to me first. But when Mr. Landry and I found you, you were alone.”

“J.Lo was with me,” I said. “He’s a grown-up. He’s thirty-six.”

“And a half,” said J.Lo.

“He does not take care of you. I do. If anything, I take care of him, too—this morning I had to stop him drinking the water out of a car battery.”

“Is good that way. Tangy.”

I elbowed J.Lo.

“It’s just that…” said Mom, “I don’t think you should be outside too much with…him.” She waved her arm at the Boov.

“J.Lo,” he answered.

“Yes. Him. What is that he’s building?”

“It’s a kind of Boov shower. Look, J.Lo will be fine,” I said. “He’s fooled all kinds of people.”

“But now I want to make more littles cards to explain whyfor I wear the ghostsuit and do not talk. To give to peoples. I want you to help me to write it down.”

“Okay.”

Mom watched silently as J.Lo hopped off his chair and looked for a piece of paper. She leaned over and held my arm.

“We just need to be careful,” she said. “We need to be so careful.”

“We will.”

“No. I know. But listen…”

Her breath was warm against my face and smelted like cherry lip balm. I waited for her to speak. Her eyes had a kind of knowing look I hadn’t remembered.

“We cannot get separated again. We can’t. These Takers can take anything they want but you. Anything but you.”

I nodded. And I was suddenly aware of J.Lo, standing rigid beside me. He’d brought pencils and paper.

“Ahem. I will also be careful,” he said. “I am promising, because I do not want Tip to lose Tipmom again, on account I know all about families, and know that LucyTucci made Tip and took care of her and did not just lay her egg and leave it in the streets for others.”

Mom gazed into my face like she was in a trance. I smiled a little.

“And Tip has also in my opinions been very brave, having only eleven years but wanting to findto her Mom so much she had to drive and get shot upon and also beat me up once. Which could not be helped.”

I turned to J.Lo.

“Have you been practicing this?”

“A littles bit,” he said.

With what looked like titanic effort, Mom turned her face from mine and looked J.Lo dead in the eye for maybe the first time since his sheet came off. They just watched each other for a bit. I heard someone say once that when two people look into each other’s eyes for longer than five seconds, they’re about to either fight or kiss. I didn’t really want to see either. Then Mom spoke.

“It’s good she wasn’t alone. I’m…glad she had someone with her while we were apart,” she said, and J.Lo’s face went a little orange. “I understand you’re going to be staying with us for a while.”

“Yes, please.”

Mom rose and nodded as she straightened the kitchen.

“La nostra casa è la vostra casa,” she said.

“I wants to come,” said J.Lo. “Tipmom gave both us permission.”

It had been a few days since we’d met Dan Landry, and I knew from Mom that he’d be in his office down by the airport all day.

“I know,” I said. “I’m sorry. But Landry’s office is in a hotel by the airport, and people say that area is crawling with Gorg. We wouldn’t want them to sniff you out.”

“Ah,” he said. “Yes. It is fine. You know, I was wanting to wash my sheet anyways. Someone got cat hair and milk shake alls over it.”

So I drove to the airport, thinking of how he looked after he said that, thinking about how he really just nodded and lay down on the bed. He was spending more and more time in bed.

Up ahead, past a gas station, I saw the high-rise hotel where Landry watched over his district. I parked in the lot next to a big saguaro cactus. I was still getting used to cacti. They made the rocks and brush of the desert look like the bottom of some fierce ocean. I walked under a big awning hanging over the entrance to the hotel, dodging a lot of people that were coming and going. As I opened the glass door to the lobby, it reflected a hulking green shape bending over my car.

That wasn’t another cactus, I thought as I turned to look, knowing what I’d see. A Gorg walked around Slushious, peering in, keeping one scabby hand around a shoulder strap attached to either a large rifle or a small chimney.

“Um,” I said, stepping slowly back toward the car. Gorg didn’t move, but his bloodshot eyes snapped up and trained on my face. I could almost feel crosshairs there.

“A Boov made it for me,” I said. “Back in Pennsylvania. Really far away.”

Gorg drew himself up to his full height. His body uncurled like a centipede’s, and it made me think of the caterpillar from Alice in Wonderland, though not in a way that made my heart pound any less.

“WHO ARE YOU,” Gorg said, as if he’d read the same book.

“Um…Gratuity,” I said. “I guess…I guess I don’t really need to ask your—”

“THE GORG KNOW THIS VEHICLE,” he said. “THE GORG ATTEMPTED TO DESTROY THIS VEHICLE.”

“Oh…yeah. Hey, uh, was that you? Small world.”

Gorg approached, a mountain of muscle and beetle skin on legs. I could see other humans standing around the edge of the parking lot, watching. In the distance were three more Gorg walking in line with their rifles held in front of them like flagpoles. Then I could see nothing but Gorg stomach as he stopped in front of me, very close. I’ve heard a lot of foreigners don’t have the same ideas about personal space that Americans do, and I guess it’s true.