The New Magdalen

"You know what the next event was; you know how I entered this house.

"I have not tried to make the worst of my trials and troubles in telling

you what my life has been. I have honestly described it for what it was

when I met with Miss Roseberry--a life without hope. May you never know

the temptation that tried me when the shell struck its victim in the

French cottage! There she lay--dead! _Her_ name was untainted. _Her_

future promised me the reward which had been denied to the honest

efforts of a penitent woman. My lost place in the world was offered back

to me on the one condition that I stooped to win it by a fraud. I had

no prospect to look forward to; I had no friend near to advise me and to

save me; the fairest years of my womanhood had been wasted in the

vain struggle to recover my good name. Such was my position when the

possibility of personating Miss Roseberry first forced itself on my

mind. Impulsively, recklessly--wickedly, if you like--I seized the

opportunity, and let you pass me through the German lines under Miss

Roseberry's name. Arrived in England, having had time to reflect, I made

my first and last effort to draw back before it was too late. I went to

the Refuge, and stopped on the opposite side of the street, looking at

it. The old hopeless life of irretrievable disgrace confronted me as I

fixed my eyes on the familiar door; the horror of returning to that life

was more than I could force myself to endure. An empty cab passed me at

the moment. The driver held up his hand. In sheer despair I stopped

him, and when he said 'Where to?' in sheer despair again I answered,

'Mablethorpe House.' "Of what I have suffered in secret since my own successful deception

established me under Lady Janet's care I shall say nothing. Many things

which must have surprised you in my conduct are made plain to you by

this time. You must have noticed long since that I was not a happy

woman. Now you know why.

"My confession is made; my conscience has spoken at last. You are

released from your promise to me--you are free. Thank Mr. Julian Gray if

I stand here self-accused of the offense, that I have committed, before

the man whom I have wronged."