The Iron Butterfly (Iron Butterfly #1)

A small twinkling laugh erupted from the Queen, followed by more laughter from Lorna.

Adept Kambel looked around at the shocked faces of Pax and Breah, and nervously cleared his throat in embarrassment. “I think Lorna is right. We are going extinct, and if we can’t stop the Septori, then they will create more like her. It’s best if she helps us as much as she can by understanding her abilities to the fullest. Maybe then we can know what we are up against; as long as she promises to not hurt or endanger any student against their will.”

All I could do was shake my head since I was still in shock that Kambel stood up to Breah. I guess taking a few classes wouldn’t hurt, as long as I could control myself and not hurt anyone either.

With the Queen’s decisions made, I was ordered once again to go and pack my belongings so that I could be moved into the student wing of the Citadel; with a warning to never intentionally harm another Denai student.

Lorna nodded to Pax, then grabbed my elbow and led me out the door into the hall. Unbelievably, the door opened for her without her even touching it. Proof, that she was probably the one holding it closed.

They weren’t done discussing me I was sure, and they never even mentioned the attack with the dogs. But in their mind that was considered a small problem that Commander Meryl could deal with. They were more worried about the fact that there was now a potential for others like me if they didn’t find the Raven and stop his experiments.

The training program at the Citadel was established by the Queen because the Denai were slowly disappearing from the world. The Queen who was loved by all had a special place in her heart for the Denai, particularly. This gave the people of Calandry a skewed view of the Denai. They called them the Queen’s pets, and I had heard the slur whispered often enough on the streets.

Lorna had led me toward my rooms but stopped when we were almost there and spoke quietly to me. “Thalia, it would be better if you didn’t tell anyone about what happened to you. Try to fit in and don’t draw attention to yourself.”

“How do you want me to do that?” I asked.

“Pretend to be a Denai.”

“You want me to lie? I look nothing like you!” I scoffed loudly. Almost too loud, since Lorna winced and looked around. My head spun at what she wanted me to do. I was unsure about this; I didn’t want to deceive anyone. I was already an outcast as it was. And how was I to fit in? All of the Denai were beautiful, some more than others, but I knew that I fell short in that category. By my looks alone, no one would believe I was a Denai.

“Yes, do what you must, but hide what you are from the others.”

“But what am I? How can I pretend to be a Denai, if I’m not? How do you expect me to live this lie and attend classes and not participate? I don’t want to hurt anyone any more than you do. In fact, I would take it all back if I could.”

“I’m sure you will figure a way to practice, without harming anyone?” She looked at me slowly. Her eyes trying to convey what she couldn’t voice.

My head was reeling with hidden meanings and implications. “But you heard the rest of the Adepts, I’ve been forbidden, without their consent.”

Adept Lorna’s eyes softened and she whispered as if to herself. “Exactly, without their consent; I’m sure there is someone you know that is crazy enough about you to help you, if you let him. Just don’t let the others know. But you need to practice.”

“NO!”

Lorna’s eyes blinked at me in surprise. “What do you mean, no?” She hadn’t expected me to argue with her.

“Exactly that. No! I refuse to use Joss that way. I will find another alternative.” I was beginning to hate myself.

“Fine, do whatever you want. I was only trying to help you,” she snapped.

“No, I think you are trying to use me too. And I won’t have it.” I stormed off. Not even caring where I was headed as long as it was away from her, away from everyone. It was too much; the politics, the schemes, the lies.

I wandered for hours until I ended up back at my room. I was actually sad to have to say goodbye to it. And even though I would be transferred to what would be my third room since my stay at the Citadel, I had felt the most at home here, with Avina’s bright chatter to break up the quiet depression I could send myself into if I wasn’t careful.

I moved to the closet and removed my few belongings and felt a moment of alarm as I realized I didn’t know where the gift I bought for Berry went after the attack.

My hands flew to my pockets and found them bare. I conjured a picture of it lying in the street being trampled by the horses and I felt my heart plummet. I slowly closed the closet door holding my possessions when I caught something sitting on my pillow. On closer inspection it was the satchel I had thought lost. Oh, Avina! Thank the stars; she must have picked it up.

Forrest announced his arrival with a quick rap on my door. Depositing the pouch gently in the basket on top of the rest of my belongings, I paused quickly and scribbled a note to Avina, explaining that I was being moved into the student wings and not to worry that I hadn’t disappeared. I was worried she would return to see a barren room and fear the worst had happened to me. Maybe it would have been better if I hadn’t made it out alive. Quickly I pushed those negative thoughts aside.

Grabbing the basket of my belongings, I carried it out the hallway and followed Forrest to my new room.

Since my duties never included housekeeping, I never ventured into the housing wing for fear of running into Syrani, but I was taken aback immediately by the difference. The servant’s halls were simple and useful in their placement. Nothing extravagant was needed. As soon as I entered the student’s wing, I noticed the opulence of a runner lining the hall, adding a feeling of warmth to the stone floor.

Forrest stopped at an end room and opened the large wooden door into what I first thought was another meeting room because of the vastness of it, but then on closer inspection realized it was to be my room.

The room was huge with high vaulted ceilings, and being that my room was the end of the hall it was the largest. Windows filled my room with light and looked out onto the quiet rolling meadows of the gardens and horse’s field. I could hear running water from the fountain below and the sound was soothing. The room had the largest bed I had ever seen, covered with a down comforter in a soft, pale blue color with a sturdy, dark trunk at the end of the bed. The walls had simple, pale green paisley wallpaper. A sturdy, wooden desk and bookshelf aligned one wall while a fireplace with a plush, blue reading chair was on the other. The window seats were adorned with pale yellow pillows. A small table and chairs were tucked away on one side with rugs covering the floors and a large armoire completed the room.

I was frozen in awe, and had to look at Forrest to make sure he had taken me to the right room. It wasn’t just a room; it was living quarters. Of course, I shook my head in realization, this is where I would live, study, and eat for the next few years. The Adepts would want to make their students as comfortable as possible. The room wasn’t overly extravagant, just large. And since there were so few students, I wouldn’t even have to share. I thanked Forrest again as he left, bobbing his head, and I turned the big key in the lock. I put my belongings in the trunk and headed toward the window seat.

The other students would be heading for a noon meal but I decided to skip the meal altogether. It would be too awkward with too many questions and I wasn’t ready to face Joss. It was too soon to go from serving breakfast to having servants. Letting everything from the past couple of days sink in, I stared out the window at the countryside and wished to be wholly human again.