The Bairn of Brianag
Page 102I had risen and was taking tea in my bed when I heard steps on the porch, and my heart leapt. But there was a knock at the door and when Rabbit opened it, I heard Kevin's voice. I called to him and he came into the bedroom.
I held out my arms to him. He held me tightly for a moment, then released me. I looked up into his face.
"It is time for me to return home," he said.
I said, "Must you? So soon?"
"I have been gone for nearly a month already," he said; "our father will be wanting my help at Gillean."
"Yes." I looked at the floor, remembering my father's face the last time I had seen him.
"Do you wish me to bring him anything? A letter, perhaps?"
I looked up at him again. "No," I said.
Kevin's blue eyes met mine squarely. "I shall be off then," he said, turning away.
"Wait!" I said. "I shall see you out."
I put on a bed gown over my shift and followed him out onto the porch where Saul held his horse. He paused at the top of the steps and pulled on his gloves. I said, "Pray take care along the road."
"I shall." I could see he wanted to say more.
"What is it? Speak," I said.
"How is it, then, Jessie," he said, "to have got what you wanted?"
I could not answer him.
"You have broken our father's heart, you have shamed our family and Robbie's, you have abandoned your friends-all to satisfy your own desires!" His voice rose passionately.
"I did not know that Robbie could be such a fool."
"I love Robbie!" I cried. "He loves me! We are meant to be!
"Ah, yes-and your love gives the two of you license to trod over any who would stand in your way, or even advise you!"
"I did not leave home by my own choice! We will return! Our father threatened to take Robbie's child and give it away!"
"He did not know that the child is Robbie's," said Kevin, his voice quiet again. "If either you or Robbie had told him, if Robbie had had the courage, the honor to speak to our father and tell him, our father would have permitted you to marry!"
"Our mother forced me to leave. She forced me to go to Robbie before he could speak to our father," I said. "You have not yet loved, Kevin; you cannot know what it means.