Sweet Hope

Lexi wrapped her arm around Austin like he needed the support and she asked, “You used to look at the stars with Axel, baby? Like you do with me?”

Austin nodded, unable to tear his gaze away from the sculpture. “Yeah… Axe used to take us to the top of the trailer when my papa would come home drunk and hit my mamma.” Austin’s face scrunched up like he couldn’t bear to remember those times, but he added, “He would make me look up at the stars and tell him the constellations… he would distract me so I didn’t hear my mamma’s screams.” Austin looked to Levi, and wrapping an arm around his shoulder, he pointed to the baby. “That’s you, Lev. At night, Axel would take you from Mamma so when Papa came home piss drunk, he wouldn’t hurt you. Axel would keep you in our room, feed you, change and bathe you… fuck, he’d hold you all night long in his arms just in case papa came in for us. When the fighting got real bad, he’d take us both on the roof and we’d look at the stars…”

Levi’s gray eyes were huge as he leaned forward to inspect the baby in Axel’s arms. “He… he looked after me? Protected me when I was a baby?” Levi asked innocently. I watched as tears began dropping down their faces.

“I… I don’t know why I forgot all that?” Austin said numbly. He looked at Levi, then his wife, “He practically raised Levi until papa left… and me… he was always looking after me.”

Clearing my throat, my heart breaking at the love shining in their faces, I led them to Axel’s newest piece. As I walked in front of Levi, I heard a painful whimper escape his mouth.

I stood in front of the sculpture and looked to my friends. Rome was running his hand down his face. “Shit,” I caught him whisper to Molly who was studiously reading the text board.

“Hamartia,” I announced, pointing at the statue.

“That’s me,” Levi claimed. I could see the agony on his face as he relieved that moment. “Shit, Aust, that’s me and Axe when I was younger.”

Austin was drinking in the piece with disbelieving eyes. “What does Hamaria mean?” he asked gruffly.

“Sin,” Molly said from behind us and everyone turned to face her. She blushed as she realized she’d said it out loud. “It’s Aristotelian philosophy. It means taking someone to a dark place, missing the mark, to err, or doing wrong is how it’s normally interpreted today.”

“Sin…” Levi said.

I heard Cass whistle low in her throat. “That’s some powerful shit right there,” she said quietly. I wanted to look to her, but I couldn’t take my eyes off Levi. Tears were streaming down his handsome face.

As though sensing my stare, Levi looked to me and asked, “How, Al? How did he go from the Heighters, to prison… to this? How is it possible?”

Glancing away from his penetrating gaze, I debated how much to tell them. But deciding that secrets and lies had been the source of so much misunderstanding, I came clean with it all.

“Axel… went through some things when he was in prison.”

“What things?” Austin snapped, his body stiffening in apprehension.

“Beatings, being ostracized by his former crew members. The Heighters inside branded him a turncoat. They pinned him down and blotted out his Stidda with a needle and ink.” Austin paled and he squeezed Lexi tighter.

“A guy called Alessio was sent down to the same prison as him,” I explained. Levi gasped, his eyes shooting to Austin.

“Did you know that, Aust? Did you know Alessio was inside too?”

Austin shook his head. “Ally, when—”

“Two years into his sentence. It was the reason he started refusing your visits. He was worried Alessio would get to you when you came back to Bama, so he cut off all ties.”

Austin looked like he was going to be sick, so I decided to tell him everything at once. “Long story short, Alessio attacked him over Gio’s death and Axel got hurt… bad. They stabbed him in his neck, held him down and shanked him.”

Lexi turned her head and nuzzled into Austin’s chest. She cried.

“It’s the reason he has long hair,” I informed. “It hid the scar so you wouldn’t ask questions.”

“Christ…” Austin rasped.

“He nearly died,” I said sadly. “He was in the infirmary for a real long time. He was so angry, so bitter at the world… so angry at himself for everything he’d done… especially for missing your mamma’s death. To try and help him cope with his anger, they sent him to an art class. He was a natural, and quickly gained the favor of the teacher, who sent pictures of his first piece to Vin Galanti, a marble sculptor. He took Axel under his wing and the rest is history.” I looked into the eyes of every single one of my friends and said, “He came to Seattle for this show. He just never felt he deserved it enough to tell y’all. He’s crippled by guilt and shame.”