Starry Eyes
Page 32“Whoa,” Reagan says. “Everyone calm down. Lennon, if Brett says it was defective, it was.”
Lennon stands and gets in Brett’s face. “Where were you?”
“Hey, stop shining that damn headlamp in my eyes,” Brett complains.
“Just now. You weren’t with the group. Where were you? Did you run from the bear?”
“Um, no.”
Lennon gestures dramatically. “I told you not to run. They see you as prey, and they’ll chase you. Black bears can run faster than humans.”
“Not Reagan,” Brett says, attempting to lighten the mood.
“Yes, even Reagan,” Lennon insists. “Even freaking Usain Bolt, if the bear was angry and charging at full speed. That one there was easily three hundred pounds. It could have killed any one of us.”
“Dude, you need to chill,” Brett says, getting annoyed. “Your holier-than-thou shit is starting to stink.”
“Yeah, well, I’ll stop preaching when you pay attention and quit treating this like a game.”
“I haven’t done anything.”
“You neglected to put the lid on your canister,” Lennon says, stabbing a finger in the air accusingly. “Then you ran from the bear after I said not to.”
Brett roughly pushes Lennon. “Guess what? You aren’t in charge, dude.”
Lennon shoves Brett’s shoulder. “You put us all in danger, dude.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Kendrick says, getting between the two boys and forcing them apart. “We’re not gonna do this. Let’s all relax and figure it out.”
Reagan steps into the circle. “Hey! Maybe you need to consider that Brett’s telling the truth.”
“Thank you, Reagan,” Brett says, still angry. “I’m glad someone here trusts me.”
Everyone tries to talk at once. Kendrick wants people to settle down. Lennon wants Brett to admit that he’s wrong. Reagan wants Lennon to leave Brett alone. Summer wants to know if the bear is going to come back—which is something I think we all need to consider. So with her help, I start packing Brett’s food remnants inside the now-empty bear canister, sweeping up cookie crumbs into my palm. My eyes fall on the canister lid, poking out from the rubble.
It crosses my mind that all I’d need to do is pick it up and test it out on the canister to see if Brett was lying about it being faulty. Do I want to know? If Brett was lying, he’ll look like an idiot. Or Lennon might kill him. Conflicting emotions swirl inside my chest, so I continue cleaning up, avoiding the lid.
“This is a wreck,” Summer says when the arguing dies down, lifting up a piece of shredded tent. “I know we talked about wild animals, but I swear, in a million years, I never really believed we’d see one. Like, maybe some squirrels or rabbits. But not this.”
That makes two of us.
Sullen, Lennon kneels at my side and picks up a dented can.
“Did you see any bears when you were out here before?” Summer asks Lennon. “Is that how you knew what to do?”
He shakes his head. “I’ve seen them alongside bigger trails in other parts of the park, but they always kept their distance. This one is way too comfortable around people. I think I need to report it, so that the rangers can keep an eye on this area. But right now, we need to make sure the food is contained so that it doesn’t come back.”
“And figure out what to do about this tent,” I say, glancing at Brett. “I don’t think you can sleep here.”
Summer shrugs at Brett. “You can just sleep in Reagan’s tent. I mean, you’d end up there, anyway, right? No biggie.”
My body goes rigid.
“Uh-oh,” Summer murmurs. “Sorry, guys. I know I wasn’t supposed to say anything.”
I glance from Summer to Reagan and Brett. “Are you two . . . together?”
“Reagan?” I say. “Is it true?”
“Zorie . . .” She squeezes her eyes shut.
Oh, God. It is true.
“You two are together? Why didn’t you tell me?”
She lifts a hand to gesture and then lets it fall back down to her side and shakes her head. “I don’t know. Because.”
“Because why?”
“I knew you’d flip out, okay?” she says, suddenly defensive.
“I’m not—”
“You are doing it right now. Don’t you see? You always get freaked out when things don’t go exactly the way you’ve planned, with all your stupid blueprints and checklists, and maybe I just didn’t want to deal with that.”
I’m humiliated. And confused. If she was seeing Brett, why did she encourage me to go after him back after the kiss at that party? “How long have . . . ? I mean, since when?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
“Why?” she says, exasperated. “Don’t you get it? I was trying to spare your feelings. That’s why I made Brett invite Lennon along.”
“What are you taking about?”
Oh, God. I want to die. I can’t even look at Lennon. I’m utterly humiliated.
“And the thing is,” she continues, “you insisted that the two of you were just friends, even when I asked you point-blank if you were seeing each other. I even asked Avani—because God knows you tell her more secrets than you’ve ever told me—but she covered for you and said nothing was going on.”
This is impossible. Avani never knew, so there was no reason for her to “cover” for anything.
Reagan crosses her arms. “Apparently, I’m not part of the inner circle anymore. I’m just someone you use when it’s convenient, like when you need a place to sit at lunch.”
“That’s not true!” Right? I’m not using Reagan—at least not more than she uses me. She cheats off my tests in class. She calls to ask for help with homework. Do I not help her?
“Clearly you don’t trust me with your secrets,” she says. “So why should I trust you with mine?”
I want to respond, but I’m stuck in place, dumbly staring.
“Reagan . . . ,” Summer says in a tentative voice.
“You just couldn’t keep quiet, could you?” Reagan says, turning on Summer. “A couple more days, and she would be gone on her stupid astronomy club meet-up. All I asked was that you not say anything about Brett and me until after she’d left, but you couldn’t help yourself, could you?”
“I—”
“I just wanted one nice thing this summer. Just one!” Reagan’s eyes gloss over with tears. “None of you has any idea what I’m going through. You have no idea what’s it like to train every single day for years—years! Then my foot slips for a fraction of a second and I have to give up on my dreams.”
“You aren’t the only person here with dreams,” I tell her.
“But I’m the only person here with the talent to back them up.”
“Christ,” Kendrick says. “Listen to yourself, Reagan.”