Shopaholic & Baby (Shopaholic #5)

“I didn’t want to spoil the party.” I flush as everyone turns toward me. “Everyone was having such a lovely time….” I break off, realizing I still haven’t told him. “Luke…there’s something else. We’ve lost the house.”

As I say the words I feel a wave of crushing disappointment again. Our beautiful family house, gone.

“You’re kidding.” Luke’s face darkens in shock.

“They’re selling it to someone else. But…it’ll be fine!” Somehow I force a bright smile. “We can rent a flat somewhere…. I’ve been looking on the Net — we’ll easily find somewhere….”

“Becky…” I can see it in his eyes too. Our dreams, destroyed.

“I know.” I blink back the tears. “It’ll be fine, Luke.”

“Oh, Becky.” I look over, and Suze is practically in tears too. “Have our castle in Scotland. We never use it!”

“Suze.” I can’t help a half-giggle. “Don’t be silly.”

“You’ll come and live with us, love!” Mum chimes in. “You won’t rent any nasty flat! And as for you, young lady…” She turns on Venetia, her face pink with outrage. “How dare you upset my daughter when she’s in labor!”

Shit.

I’d forgotten about being in labor.

“God, of course!” Suze claps a hand over her mouth. “Bex, you haven’t made a peep! You’re amazing!”

“My darling, you are such a star.” Luke looks absolutely awestruck. “All this, and you’re in labor….”

“Oh…er…it’s nothing!” I try to sound modest. “You know….”

“It’s not nothing — it’s incredible. Isn’t it?” Luke appeals to the student midwives.

“She is pretty special,” agrees Paula, who has been following the exchange with Venetia with a wide-open mouth. “That’s why we’re all observing her.”

“Special, huh?” Venetia suddenly says. She comes over and looks me up and down, her eyes narrowed. “Becky, when exactly was your last contraction?”

“Er…” I clear my throat. “It was…er…just now.”

“She’s a Scientologist,” puts in Paula eagerly. “She’s managing the pain silently. It’s wonderful to watch.”

“A Scientologist?” echoes Luke.

“It’s my new hobby!” I say brightly. “Didn’t I tell you?”

“I never knew you were a Scientologist, Bex!” says Suze in surprise.

“Is that the Moonies?” Mum demands of Luke in alarm. “Has Becky joined the Moonies?”

“Well, now.” Venetia’s eyes gleam. “Let’s have a look at you, Becky. Maybe this baby’s ready to be delivered!”

I edge away. If she gets to examine me, I’m basically dead.

“Don’t be shy!” Venetia is advancing on me, and in panic I hurry round to the other side of the bed.

“Look at that mobility!” one of the student midwives is saying admiringly.

“Come on, Becky….”

“Go away! Leave me alone!” I grab the gas and air mask and start gulping it in. That’s better. God, we should have a tank of this stuff at home.

“We’re here!” The door is thrust open and everyone looks up to see Danny bursting in, followed by Jess. “We’re here! Did we miss it?”

Jess is wearing her She’s a Yummy Mummy and We Love Her T-shirt, to match Suze’s. Danny is wearing a blue cashmere tank with She’s a RedHaired Bitch and I Hate Her printed in khaki on the front.

“Where’s the baby?” Danny looks around the room with bright eyes, taking in the tense scene. His eyes alight on Venetia. “Hey, who invited Cruella de Venetia?”

Luke is staring at the slogan on Danny’s tank top. He gives a sudden snort of comprehending laughter.

“You’re so juvenile,” spits Venetia, who has also clocked the tank top. “All of you. And if Little Miss Becky is really in labor, then I’m—”

“Oh,” I shriek. “Oh! I’m leaking!”

God, that’s the weirdest feeling. Something somewhere has just burst, and a pool of water is gathering at my feet. I can’t stop it.

“Jesus!” says Danny, shielding his eyes. “OK…way too much info.” He takes Jess’s elbow. “C’mon, Jess, let’s go get a drink.”

“Your water has gone,” says Paula, looking puzzled. “I thought that happened yesterday.”