Rock with Me

“I don’t ever want to get married,” he replies, his eyes sobering. This surprises me.

“Never?”

He shakes his head, watching me closely.

“You don’t necessarily have to be married to be committed to someone,” I remind him.

“My job is really hard on relationships, Sam. Trust is hard to maintain, on both sides. I’m gone a lot.” He shrugs and looks sad for a second, but covers it up with a grin. “Why are you single?”

I just had to go there, didn’t I?

“Never been even close to marriage, and don’t intend to be.” I withdraw automatically, school my features, and give him a bland look.

And piss him the fuck off.

“You’re lying.” His gray eyes heat.

“No, I’m not.” I shake my head and focus on tracing the letters on his chest.

“Why did you just pull away?” He asks, watching me closely. I continue to trace the ink on his chest, and he stills me by gripping my hand in his.

“I’m sorry I asked,” I whisper.

“Sam, we’re just having a conversation.” I shake my head, but he leans in and kisses me softly and I relax instinctively.

He calms me, and that makes me nervous.

“I was in a relationship that ended very badly,” I whisper. “I don’t trust people easily, and don’t see myself ever trusting anyone enough to commit to them like that.”

“Look at me.”

Instead, I lean in and rest my forehead against his sternum.

“Look at me, sunshine.” His voice is almost light and I risk a peek.

He’s smiling.

“Am I funny?” I ask and give him a mock glare.

“Actually, yes, you can be.” He continues to grin, and I just want to lean in and grip that piercing in my teeth and tug. “This might sound selfish, but I’m glad it didn’t work out with the other guy because then I wouldn’t be here with you, and I’ve never enjoyed myself more.”

I feel my mouth drop and eyes widen. That might be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

How pathetic am I?

“But I also want to kick the shit out of him for hurting you.”

“Maybe I hurt him,” I reply with a smirk.

He watches me closely and then exhales as he shakes his head. “No, he hurt you.” He pulls me against him and wraps his arms around me tightly. “Did he ever hit you?” He asks, his voice just a whisper.

“No,” I respond immediately. “And I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay.”

“So, who’s your favorite band?” He asks, making me laugh.

“Who’s your favorite band?” I ask.

“I asked you first.”

I squint my eyes like I’m thinking really hard. “U2.”

“You are so gonna pay for that.” He attacks me with tickles, and I shriek with laughter, and then moan in pleasure as his hands roam over my body.

“I think I like this payment system you have.”

“I’m just getting started, sunshine.”

Chapter Five

I’m a moron. What the fuck was I thinking? Since when do I let my loins make the decisions?

Because that’s exactly what happened yesterday. And last night.

And again this morning.

I shift uncomfortably in the drivers seat of my car, the soreness between my legs reminding me exactly where Leo spent the majority of the past twenty-four hours.

The man is just sex on a stick.

So much for not getting involved. I’d been doing so well all week, keeping him at a distance. And then he had to go and look so right there in my apartment, and I just couldn’t keep my hands off of him.

But not again. No, for the sake of my sanity, and keeping my family relatively drama-free, last night was a one-time deal.

I’ll find another fuck buddy to play with once in a while and things will go back to normal.

So why does the thought of that make me sick to my stomach?

I park outside the coffee shop near Alki beach in West Seattle. We decided to meet near Nat and Luke’s place this time, which suits me just fine. The view here is amazing, even on a dark, gloomy day like today.

I wrap my black scarf around my neck and move quickly through the wind and rain to the café and immediately spot Nat, Jules and Meg at a table near the back.

“Hey!” I wave at them and order a chai tea and then join them.

“How’s it going?” Jules asks and sips her latte.

“Good. How are you guys?” I ask and take a seat.

“We’re good, we’re talking about Nat and Luke’s big move.” Meg replies and points to Natalie.

“What big move?” I ask and sip my tea.

“We’re moving.” Natalie responds and bites her lip.

“What?” What the fuck? “Where the hell are you moving to? If you say L.A., I’ll kick your ass.”

“No.” She waves me off and shakes her head, a wide grin on her pretty face. “We’re just moving to a bigger house.”

“When?” Jules asks and takes a bite of a scone. How can she eat like that and stay thin? I think I hate her.

“We just started looking. I don’t know.” Nat shrugs. “I’m hoping before the new baby comes because I won’t want to deal with it after it’s born.”

We all nod in agreement and sip our drinks.

“I’ll help you look, if you want,” I offer. “I like to shop for anything.”