Rebel Heart
Page 10Emmi’s playin dice with Nero. It’s his favourite game, but ever since Jack learned him to cheat Em’s th’only one’ll give him a game. She’s on a mission to mend his wicked ways. Tonight, she’s kept aside a fried locust fer a reward.
No, she says. Cheatin crows do not git bugs. Well, if you want one, play proper. Now, watch me. You see? Okay, now you go. No . . . no, Nero! Oh, I give up.
She leaves him to gobble the bug an comes to crouch beside me. That bird of yers is a lost cause, she says. Jack’s a bad inflamence. When I see him, I’m gonna give him a piece of my mind. Fancy teachin innocent crows to cheat.
He tried to pick my pocket th’other day, I says. You can lay that at Jack’s door too.
Jack’s a rascal, all right, she says. He must be at the Big Water by now. Probly bin there ages. He must think we ain’t comin. D’you think he’ll . . . he will wait fer us, won’t he?
I keep tellin you, Saba, Jack ain’t gonna show at the Big Water. He’s long gone. A guy like him’s only in it fer hisself. Once he’s got what he wants, he moves on.
I shut my ears to Lugh’s voice in my head.
He’ll be there, I says. You know Jack keeps his word.
Yeah, she says. You miss him, I can tell.
Without thinkin, my hand goes to the heartstone around my neck. But of course, it ain’t there. Not really, I says.
Yer such a bad liar, she says. Anyways, I seen you an him love kissin that time. You had yer hands on his—
Shut up, Em!
Well, I miss him, she says. I miss him heaps. I wish he was here right this very second. Jack always makes things okay. Even when they’re real bad.
Yeah, I says.
She’s quiet fer a moment, rollin the dice around in her fingers. He told me an Tommo how he found you, she says, with the dead wolfdogs an all. He said you thought you seen Tracker.
Guess I made a mistake, I says. Lugh figgers I was sleepwalkin. Tracker’d never go nowhere without Mercy.
She hesitates, lookin at me sidewise, then says, I’m worried about you, Saba.
Don’t be.
Well, I am. You ain’t sick, are you? You’d tell me if you was sick.
No, I says. But I ain’t.
Jest becuz I’m nine, don’t mean I’m a stupid little kid. You should know that by now. She leans in close. Don’t tell Lugh, she whispers, but I bin askin the stars how to help you.
Don’t git started with all that, Emmi. You know what Lugh thinks about star readin.
Jest then, he calls out, Hey, Em, I nearly fergot! Come meet Fred!
What? Her face lights with surprised delight. She leaps up an scoots over to the boys. I breathe with relief. A dog with a bone ain’t got nuthin on my sister.
Em’s got this peg doll, Fern, that Pa made when she was two. She’s bin buggin Lugh to death an back to whittle a husband fer Fern. The moment she had the idea, she started callin the damn thing Fred.
You made him in secret, I never knew! She takes Fred from Lugh. Gasps an laughs at the same time. No! she cries. Lugh, you made his nose huge! Yer a bad tease . . . Oh, you gotta fix it, Fern wants a handsome husband.
Lugh shakes his head, sayin, Oh no, Fern told me herself, whittle me a distinguished husband, if you please, Lugh. Make sure you give him a fine, big nose.
Look what I made! Tommo digs in his pocket an hands her a lump of wood.
Oh! Emmi looks puzzled at it fer a moment, then beams at him. That’s good, Tommo. You made a pig! She squishes her nose flat an snorfles like a piggy. She’s always actin out so’s Tommo knows what she means. She don’t need to. He lip-reads easy, so long as you don’t talk too fast.
He frowns. No, he says. Their baby.
A wolfdog howl splits the night. Not far away. We tense. Another dog answers. Then another.
Tommo looks a question at Lugh. Wolfdogs, he tells him.
Emmi shivers, her eyes big. They sound near, she says.
Naw, says Lugh, they’re a long ways off. But he pulls his bow an quiver a little closer. He shoves more wood on the fire to build up the blaze. Don’t worry, Em, yer big bad brother’ll keep them big bad wolfies away.
Emmi snugs into his side. He puts his arm around her. Hey, Lugh, she says, what do the stars say about the Big Water?
A mistake. She knows it the moment the words leave her mouth.
Lugh’s face darkens. How many times do I gotta tell you, Em? Star readin’s a crock. Madmen an simpletons, that’s who believes in it. His voice is harsh, lashes at her.
Emmi says, But Pa always—
That’s enough! says Lugh.
Tommo breaks the tension. Tell a story, Lugh, he says. Say what it’s like at the Big Water.
Tommo took Ike’s death hard. He’s still mournin an no wonder. Ike took him in, starved an half wild, after he found him hidin in the stables of The One-Eyed Man. He kept him, taught him an called him son fer goin on three year. Tommo won’t never ferget him.
But the last little while, I noticed how close he watches Lugh. He’s started to copy Lugh’s ways. His walk, how he holds his reins an wears his hat.
He used to do the same with Ike.
Ike’s take on it went like this. Tommo’s own pa went off huntin one day an never come back. He told his boy – a young deaf boy, can you believe anybody’d do such a thing? Ike said, shakin his head – he told him not to leave their camp, not to budge from that spot, he’d be back soon. That was the last Tommo ever seen of him. Missin, presumed dead. Killed by the beast he was huntin or injured an couldn’t find his way back.
Tommo never got over it, accordin to Ike. He said he’d always be lookin fer his dead pa. I never gave much credence to Ike’s notion, but now, seein how Tommo is with Lugh, I wonder if he might not of bin onto somethin.
Our pa was with us. Till the Tonton killed him that day. But he might as well not of bin, fer all the good it did us. Lugh was me an Em’s brother, ma an pa all rolled up in one.
Lugh spins his yarn into the night. The Big Water’s like somethin from a dream, he says. Think of the best dream you ever had in yer life an it’s a thousand times better’n that. A million times more wonderful. It’s a land so rich an green an beautiful that when you see it fer the first time, you’ll wish you could die right there an then.
Lugh always starts his Big Water tales the same way, with the same words. I yawn. I close my eyes an settle back to listen. This is the Lugh we know. Tellin stories. Makin us smile. Holdin us together.
Say about the rabbits, says Em. They’re Tommo’s favourite bit.
Agin? All right, says Lugh. Well, there’s rabbits everywhere at the Big Water. As far as the eye can see, nuthin but rabbits. You cain’t move fer trippin over ’em. An you ain’t never seen ones like these fellas. They’re big. Fat an juicy an lazy from doin nuthin but nibble on sweet, green grass all day long. An they’re so tame an so dumb that when you wanna eat, all you do is set yer pot to boilin, yell out ‘Supper time!’ an them rabbits march right up to the pot, hop in an pull the lid over. An they whistle while they do it.