Reap
Page 44“Look at me.” I did as the female asked.
“Do you know your name?” she repeated. I moved my hand to trace my number, when she stopped me, gripping my hand. She stared at me for a long time and asked, “Can you speak?”
A pain flashed through my head and images came to my mind.… Master hanging me to a wall with my hands behind my back. I had spoken my name. I had tried to speak.…
“You’ll never speak again!” he shouted. “You’ll never say that fucking dog name again!”
I opened my mouth, but Master pulled the chains tighter. I cried out in pain as my arms pulled further back, my shoulders on fire with pain.
“You’re not that name anymore. You won’t speak ever again. You’ll be silent. You’re 221, and you’re under my command!” The chains pulled harder and harder until my arm snapped from the socket and I screamed out in pain. My body hung from the wall, my head bowing forward to Master.
Don’t talk. Don’t talk ever again, I told myself. Master will bring pain if you do.…
I gasped as sweat poured from my head. The female moved in closer and wiped at my face with her hand. “Breathe,” she soothed, “breathe.”
I looked into her eyes and saw them shining.
She sat back and watched me. “Your name?” she whispered, wiping the wetness from her face.
I glanced down and my stomach clenched as I tried to push words from my mouth. I opened my mouth. The female held her breath. My eyes searched the room for Master. I’d be punished if I talked.
“It’s okay,” the female again soothed. “Speak. No one will hurt you. You’re safe. You’re finally safe.” I wanted to speak. I wanted to please her. I didn’t want her to leave.
I cleared my throat and it felt raw. But I could feel my voice. I startled—I had a voice. Master wasn’t here to take my voice.
The female’s hand squeezed mine, still lying over her heart. She repeated, “My name is Talia, who are you?”
Squeezing her hand back, I forced my voice to work. It croaked, “2 … 2 … 1…”
The female sat back and sucked in a breath. A few tears streamed down her cheeks, but as I was about to back away, thinking I’d hurt her, her lips moved and she smiled even though her lips trembled.
“You speak,” she said in relief. “You can speak. And your accent…” She blushed, but shook her head, lip curling. She seemed … happy?
I listened to the sounds. I rolled them around my mind, and said, “Tal … Tal … i … a…” A relieved sigh burst from her mouth. She moved until she was right in front of me.
I stared at her face, her pretty face, her soft eyes, entranced by the way she looked at me. I put my finger to her heart, then put my finger over mine, and I asked, “You are … for me?”
A whoosh of air passed through her parted lips. Her words caught in her throat. Her dark eyes shone brightly as water filled them, soaking her long black lashes.
Slowly, her hands moved to each side of my face and threaded in my long wet hair. I held my breath, heart beating loudly. Then, she did something I’d never felt before, she pressed her lips to my forehead.
I swallowed at the feeling this press of her lips brought to my heart. The sun. Something inside of me told me it was like the feel of the sun shining on my face.
I frowned as that thought crossed my mind. I did not remember standing out in the sun, head tipped back as it warmed my face, but something inside told me that I had done it once, or a lot, I did not know.
The female broke away. Her finger drifted down and traced over my number tattoo. Her long lashes fluttered, and she said, “This is a slave number given to you as a child. What was done to you was sick, twisted, and very, very wrong. They, that man, called you by this number your whole life. But you had a name. You still have a name.”
I stilled, something long forgotten trying to push through to my mind.
I’d always been 221.
I am 221.
I am Master’s 221.
I am—
“Zaal,” the female said suddenly. My body tensed, a wash of pain stabbing at my flesh. “Your name is Zaal. Do you remember?”
I clenched my jaw as it hurt to think of that name. Zaal.
I slumped, out of breath. Tal … Talia’s arms wrapped around me. I thought of what she’d said. I was free. Master wasn’t here. I had a name. Zaal. So much raced through my head. I pulled away. I turned my attention to my chains against the wall and felt ice cold.