Off the Record
Page 51“I don’t know either. What do you want me to tell you, since you won’t listen to the truth?” Victoria grumbled.
Liz tried to ignore her friend’s frustration. The underlying tone said that Victoria wanted to help. She had to hold on to that. “I want you to tell me that it’s all going to be all right. That I haven’t made a huge mistake. That things will all work out in the end.”
She could see what Victoria was poised to say. She could read it on her face clear as day. You want me to lie.
But then she didn’t. “Everything is going to be all right, Liz…somehow.”
Hearing Victoria say that only made it worse.
“I’m, uh…going to go to class,” Liz said, collecting all of her belongings, folding the paper, and shoving it back under her arm. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Please be careful,” Victoria said anxiously. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’ll be fine.” Fine. Ugh!
Liz hurried out of the Pit and away from the ever-watchful eyes. She needed to find somewhere quiet…somewhere she could be alone before her class. She knew she would be hard-pressed to find that right now. Students were crawling all over campus like ants after someone stepped on an anthill.
She wanted to go to the newspaper office, but she dreaded seeing and confronting Hayden about the picture. He had no idea what he had done by putting it there. And she couldn’t face him without demanding to know why he had put the picture on the front cover without her permission.
It was better that she avoided him entirely.
Liz just started walking. It was better to keep moving than to stop and contemplate everything piling up around her.
Secrets were going to be her downfall. Her secrets now had secrets. She couldn’t tell anyone about Brady. She couldn’t tell Brady about Hayden. She couldn’t tell Hayden about her anger about the paper. And all of it together felt as if it wasn’t just caving in on top of her, but it was crushing her.
Worst of all…it felt as if by holding on to all of her secrets, she was losing a part of herself.
Liz found a seat on a bench on one of the trails on campus. It was as secluded as she was going to get at this time of day.
She fiddled with her necklace, admiring the mix of charms Brady had picked out for her. The yellow gemstone always caught her eye. It signified the end of the campaign, but did that mean they could be together? She hadn’t thought to ask him in the moment, and now she thought about it all the time. If he won, could they move on from the place they were in?
It felt like such a small chance…such a small sliver of hope. An unrealistic, tiny sliver of hope.
And she hated having it as much as she reveled in the thought that it could mean something. That maybe a part of him somewhere…wanted them to be together.
She dropped the locket and reached for her phone. She knew what she needed to do. She couldn’t keep sitting here like this waiting for Brady to call her, because she knew inevitably he would. Too long she had let life lead her around, and she couldn’t keep sitting back and waiting to see where she was going to end up. Facing Brady wasn’t going to be easy, but it was the right thing to do, and in the end, they had too much to talk about.
“Hello, Sandy Carmichael for the Senator, please,” Liz responded curtly.
Pause. “One moment please.”
Liz tried not to roll her eyes. The secretary knew the name was a fake one, and kept reminding Liz by pausing dramatically after she used it. Brady needed to get a new secretary.
“Senator Maxwell is currently unavailable. Can I take a message?” the secretary asked when she came back on the line.
Liz sat there frozen for a couple seconds. She hadn’t expected Brady to be busy.
“Uh…just let him know that I called,” Liz said.
“I’ll make a note of it,” she said before hanging up.
Well, then!
Liz didn’t know what else to do. She would just stress over it all day…until he called her back…if he called her back.
Liz rose from her seat and let her feet carry her to class. She sat through three lectures that day, and by the time she left she felt even more restless than before.
Brady still hadn’t called. He was sending a message. One she didn’t particularly care for.
Liz made her way to the newspaper for their first meeting of the semester. She knew there was plenty to discuss, but she was sure that she wouldn’t be able to focus.
Hayden greeted her at the door with a smile, one she was hard-pressed to return. But the heat in his gaze, the pleasure in his smile, and his overall demeanor upon seeing her forced a smile out of her.
“Hey,” he said as she approached. “It’s good to see you. How was the first day back?”
Liz shrugged noncommittally. “Not bad. Not great.”
“Mine was about the same. It does seem to be brightening, though,” he said, looking directly at her.
Liz cleared her throat and averted her gaze. She teetered around Hayden as more people filed into the room. Hastily avoiding Meagan, the gossip columnist, Liz took a seat near the back. Hayden stood in the front of the room and greeted the paper’s staff. There was a series of cheers for the start of the new school year before he launched into all of the plans he had.
Hayden held a room captivated in a way that was entirely different from Brady. Hayden had a charisma and enthusiasm that seemed to radiate out of him, and he led by example, shouldering as much of the work as he requested out of everyone else.
Slowly, as time wore on, the tension began to leave her shoulders. She stared off, absentmindedly listening to Hayden’s description of all the divisions and heralding in the new prospects.
“And with the campaign in full swing, Liz Dougherty is going to continue to head that division under my supervision. Is anyone else interested in working for her?”
Liz’s head snapped up at that. She knew that she was working on the campaign, but she hadn’t thought that she would be working with anyone. In fact, she hadn’t even really planned to consult Hayden on it. She liked the niche she had carved out for herself.
Two hands went up, and Hayden asked the students to stand and give their names and year so he could add them to the notes his assistant, Casey, was taking.
“Tristan King, freshman,” one boy said, standing near her.
She would have to figure out what to make of these new recruits. How best to use them. This was now her new task.
“Savannah Maxwell, freshman,” another voice said across the room from her.
Liz froze, her heart in her throat. No. She hadn’t even seen Savannah in the room. Had she been that out of it that she hadn’t even paid attention?
Her eyes slowly drifted to Savannah, who looked so much like her brother. Dark hair and eyes, strong features, confident, thin, beautiful…intimidatingly so. She stared back at Liz with an unreadable expression, and Liz wondered whether Savannah could see right through her.
She couldn’t work with Savannah. Liz couldn’t spend time with her. Would Savannah recognize her? Would she know that she had followed her brother, been to his galas, written nasty articles about him…and more, much more?
“Perfect,” Hayden said with a smile that said that he, for one, knew Liz’s feelings about Brady Maxwell. Or at least, he thought he did. “Welcome to the team.”
Hayden continued on with the remaining divisions and talked briefly about things she had heard year after year—conduct, journalism practices, ethics, plagiarism, etc. They were all necessary, but she didn’t need to hear them again.
“Thank you all so much for coming to our first meeting. Please meet with your division leaders briefly before departing. If anyone hasn’t been assigned a division or wishes to change, please come up to the front and see Casey. I can’t wait for another great year,” Hayden said, closing the meeting.
Her new team members, Tristan and Savannah, picked their way across the room to stand in front of Liz. Tristan shifted uncomfortably. He was a gangly guy in pressed khakis and a polo, with short, meticulously combed dark hair and pasty skin. Savannah looked unfazed as she stood awaiting instructions. Knowing her brother, Liz expected nothing else.
“Well, welcome to the team,” Liz said awkwardly, since she hadn’t been aware she would have her own team. “I have a schedule laid out for the semester. I’m working with a professor in the journalism department on a research project with other newspapers, and she is allowing me to publish in the school paper some of the work I’m doing with her.”
Liz went on to highlight what she had already been covering and what she wanted to continue to work on. She broke some of the research down for them and assigned them both tasks.
Tristan took feverish notes and Savannah just stood there and smiled, absorbing the conversation. As soon as she was finished, Tristan zipped off to begin his project, leaving her all alone with Savannah, who had barely said anything.
“Thank you for allowing me to work in campaigns,” Savannah said finally.
“I just hope that your feelings toward my brother don’t interfere in our work relationship.” Her voice was calm and controlled, but something about her tone spoke volumes. She was much too like her brothers.
Liz didn’t know how much Savannah knew, but whatever it was, was probably more than Liz would have liked.
“Personal feelings toward politicians have no place in journalism,” Liz heard herself responding dryly. “I’ve been learning that lesson all summer.”
It might not have been the smartest thing to say, considering all she had gone through with Brady this summer, but she didn’t know what else to say. If Savannah knew only about the articles, then the comment would work as well as if she knew about anything else.
“I agree. I’m sure I’ll be learning that lesson in the next several months,” Savannah said, a smile finally touching her features. “I just wanted to clear the air between us before we started working closely.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Liz said awkwardly, wanting to end this conversation. “We’ll keep personal matters out of it. You’re just Savannah and I’m just Liz.” She stuck her hand out and Savannah took it. “Pleasure to meet you.”
“So nice to meet you too. I’ll get started on my assignments right away,” Savannah said, withdrawing her hand. “See you tomorrow, Liz.”
And every day after that.
Liz grabbed her bag off of the ground and hurriedly exited the newspaper before Hayden could find her. She couldn’t deal right now. She was going to have to work with Savannah Maxwell all semester. An ever-present reminder of the secrets she had to hold.
She felt her phone vibrate as she passed through the doors to the Union and out into the oppressive August heat.
Private number.
Great. Of course, Brady would call now.
“Hey,” she answered with a sigh.
“Hey. I’ve been in meetings all morning that I couldn’t get out of,” Brady said.
It wasn’t an apology. Just a reason for not answering. Probably a good one, but she hardly had the energy for it.
“I just got out of a meeting too. In fact, your sister is now working for me.”
“What?” he asked sharply. She had clearly thrown him.
“Yep. She showed up at the newspaper meeting and said she wanted to work on campaigns. So, guess what? She now works for me.” Liz couldn’t keep the frustration and pent-up anger out of her voice.