Nothing Left to Lose

“Come on, Baby Girl, you can do it. Come on, push, Anna,” I encouraged. After what seemed like forever, she let out a piercing scream and then slumped back down on the bed, panting for breath.

“You did it, Anna. It’s a little boy,” the doctor announced.

I heard a baby cry and I felt my heart stop. Holy shit, I’m a dad! I couldn’t breathe. We had a baby. I looked back at Anna to see that she was smiling at me tenderly, her eyes glistening with tears. A sense of gratitude washed over me, making my whole body tingle. She’d made me a dad. This was honestly the best day of my life; the way Anna was looking at me made my heart ache.

“You were right,” she laughed quietly.

I bent my head and kissed her on the lips. Her hand went to the back of my head, holding my mouth to hers for a couple of seconds. When I pulled away, I grinned. I was happier than I had ever been in my life. I had the most incredible girl, and now we had a little baby boy.

“Thank you,” I said gratefully.

“You’re welcome, Pretty Boy,” she laughed. I pulled back, and she looked at the doctor, who was wrapping the baby up in a blanket. “Is he alright?” Anna asked worriedly, moving up on the bed.

“He’s perfect. Ten fingers and ten toes,” the doctor replied, walking over with a little bundle in her arms. She held him out to Anna, who took him immediately, looking down at him.

“Oh God, he’s so beautiful,” she murmured, pulling the blanket back to get a better look. A tear rolled down her face as she looked at him lovingly. I moved forward and leant over the bed so I could see. She shifted the baby in her arms, tilting him towards me. He was amazing, a perfect, little, scrunched up, dirty-looking baby with a mass of brown hair. His eyes were closed, and he was crying quietly as Anna rocked him gently. He looked just like his momma – incredible, and the most beautiful thing in the world.

“He looks just like you, Anna.” I hesitantly reached out a hand to touch him. As my fingertip touched his face, I felt my heart speed up. He was so soft. His skin was flawless and creamy-looking, even though he was covered in mess and blood. “Hi, little guy. I’m your daddy.”

“Want to hold him?” Anna asked smiling, still crying happy tears.

Oh crap, I have no idea how to do that. “Um, yeah okay,” I nodded, looking down at him. How was I supposed to take him? What was I supposed to do if he cried?

Anna laughed quietly. “Stop stressing, Ashton. Hold your arm out and I’ll pass him to you.”

I sat on the edge of her bed and cradled my arms, wincing and feeling sick with worry. She shifted him in her hands and placed him so his head was in the crook of my arm. I tensed my back and stayed completely still. He weighed hardly anything at all.

“Relax, Ashton.” Anna laughed and rubbed her hand on my leg reassuringly. The little baby in my arms was so special that I felt emotion bubbling up inside me. I was lost for words. I couldn’t take my eyes from him as his eyes fluttered open and then closed again. “My two boys,” Anna breathed.

I smiled and looked away from the perfect bundle in my arms, to his perfect momma. “I love you, Anna, so much,” I promised.

She smiled at me tenderly as she stroked the baby’s face with the back of one finger. “I love you too. I’m so sorry I shouted at you,” she said, looking at me apologetically.

I laughed and shook my head. “Would you slap me if I told you it was kind of a turn-on?” I asked, grinning.

“If you weren’t holding my son right now, then hell yeah, I’d slap you,” she answered, shaking her head disapprovingly but laughing at the same time. “Seriously though, he was so worth all of that pain. So if you want to make babies with me again anytime soon, I’m up for that.”

I laughed. “I’m always up for that, you know me.”

“I know, pervert. Maybe after I’ve had some sleep,” she joked. “So, what should we call him?” She settled back against the pillows, her hand still stroking his cheek.

I looked down at the little baby in my arms. A name sprang to mind instantly. “How about Cameron?”

“That was your dad’s name,” she said quietly. I nodded, looking up at her to see if she liked it. We hadn’t discussed names much; just a couple that we both agreed on, like Will and Kaden, but he didn’t look like either of those. “Cameron Ashton Taylor,” she cooed as a wide smile crept onto her lips. “I love it. It’s perfect.” She bent her head and kissed his forehead softly.

“Ashton?” I repeated. We hadn’t talked about a middle name.

She nodded. “Well yeah, he needs to have his daddy’s name, silly.”

After we’d both had plenty of cuddles, the doctor took him back, weighing him, checking him over and cleaning him up a little. Once he was decked out in a tiny, little white baby grow, he was placed back into his proud mommy’s arms. My heart ached at the sight of them together. I couldn’t keep the ecstatic grin off my face.

“I’d better get some photos and make the announcement,” I suggested, pulling out my cell phone. Anna chuckled, adjusting my son so that I could get a few good pictures. After sending them to Nate, Rosie and Anna’s parents, I settled down onto the bed next to her, still in slight disbelief that I was now a father.

“Your mom’s gonna be so mad that she’s not going to be first one through the door to visit,” I stated, shaking my head and imagining the panic on Melissa’s face when she heard the news that her only child had given birth to her first grandchild. They were currently in England so Tom and Melissa would have to wait a couple of days before they could meet the new Taylor family addition. She wouldn’t be happy about that at all. She was ridiculously eager to be a grandmother.