Little Black Book

“I don’t do comfort, I do real and I’m as real as it gets.”

“Noted,” I snapped.

“Can you move? Are you able to get in the car?”

I nodded before sliding into the car. Sebastian waited until we were on the move before he spoke again.

“What’s the real reason you’re afraid of guns?”

I turned to look at him, but he was facing forward.

“Ever since I was a little girl I’ve always had a fear of them.”

“That doesn’t tell me why.”

I didn’t want to talk about my parents or their death, and I was sure Sebastian didn’t want to hear the story either.

“I knew someone who was shot and killed.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either.

A full minute passed before he said anything.

“So because of your fear, you leave yourself defenseless? What would have happened if I hadn’t been here? What happens when the thing you’re afraid of turns out to be the thing that can save your life? Except, you don’t know how to use it.”

“Then I’m screwed,” I said simply.

“No.” He finally turned to look at me and I controlled the urge to wiggle under his gaze. “Then you’re dead.”

I didn’t know how to respond. Partly because I didn’t have a rebuttal, and partly because deep down, I knew he was right. We lapsed into silence and it wasn’t until we were close to my condo that I spoke.

“Who’s Anthony?” I asked.

He continued to stare out the window as he answered. “Just a guy I used to know.”

“I take it you’re from that side of town?” I knew I was prying, but I couldn’t help myself.

“Yes,” he responded.

“Does your family still live there?”

Suddenly, he turned on me with angry eyes, like the ones he gave the man who tried to rob us.

“Did anyone ever tell you, you ask too many goddamn questions?” His tone was so abrupt, it caught me completely off guard.

“I’m sorry. I just thought—”

He cut me off. “You weren’t thinking. We’re here. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

He was dismissing me like I was a child. And unlike every other time, he wasn’t going to walk me in, or even get out of the car for that matter.

By the time I made it to my floor, I felt awful. What if he didn’t have a family? There I was, playing twenty questions and I hadn’t even thought about whether or not I was asking something that might bother him.

He was being totally rude, but after thinking on it, I wasn’t surprised. He’d told me from the start what our agreement was and it didn’t include personal questions—at least when they came from me.

We were never going to veg out in front of the TV and get to know each other. And even though I’d die before I actually admitted it, I really wanted to get to know Sebastian… in more ways than one.

Fourteen

Sebastian

I was a fucking asshole. I’d known it all my life. I wasn’t born that way, but the world around me had molded me into someone who could take shit and dish it out just as quickly. Being a cocky dick had never failed me so far, until today. The hurt look in her eyes when I’d yelled at her was like a stun gun.

She didn’t know how fucked up I was. She didn’t know asking about my family was the most hurtful thing she could do. I was wrong for snapping at her. There was a big difference between sexual authority and shouting at a woman. But I knew once I settled down, I was going to make it up to her.

Steaming water poured over my face and shoulders. The shower was the first place I went when I was back home. I’d walked through the crowded club, ignoring people who thought they were my friends, and went straight up the stairs. I’d have to go back down soon and play club owner, but all I wanted to do was stand under the heat and let it burn me.

“Who took a shit on your steak?” Vick asked when I went into the office.

She was sitting behind my desk with her feet up like she owned the place.

“Fuck you. Anything going on downstairs?” I asked, flipping through papers on my desk.

“Ouch. That burns a little. Good thing I’m into pain.” She dropped her heavy boots to the floor and stood. “No one special, but you should still show your face.”

Our relationship was strained—it had been ever since I’d laid eyes on Jessica. It was another hassle I didn’t feel like dealing with, but at some point I was going to have to get to the bottom of Vick’s problems.