Let Me Love You

Part of me wants to demand what they’re doing together right now. The other part knows this isn’t my business. She’s not my business anymore.

Then there’s the part that knows I need to get out of here before I’m seen. I push my helmet back on and make a U-turn, heading back the way I came, my bike screaming as I do so.

Now I need this long drive more than anything to clear my head. They wouldn’t do this to me. Maybe Layla walked out a few seconds behind them and I missed? Yeah that has to be it.

I take the scenic route; needing the speed and control of the open road. The further I travel, the more relaxed I feel. When I get to the house, I park my bike in the driveway and take my helmet off. I walk up to the front door and unlock it. Everything is dark and cold from being closed up all winter. It smells like an attic or a basement that no one ever goes in and everything has settled.

Slipping off my jacket, I hang it on the back of a chair in the kitchen then put my helmet on the table. I walk out the back door, letting the sun warm by body from the chilly drive. It feels nice and relaxing.

The beach is deserted since it’s only April and it’s way too cold to play in the Atlantic. I kick my shoes off and then remove my socks and walk down the steps and past the sand dunes. I find a place in the sand and lay down.

It’s peaceful; the only sound is the waves crashing onshore and a seagull here or there. That’s when my mind drifts.

How did my life get like this? I used to be the player, never wanting to be tied down to one person. The cleat chasers were on speed dial whenever I felt the need for company. The only thing that ever mattered to me was baseball. That’s it.

Life was simple.

Add a girl into the mix and your whole world is knocked out of the park. One girl hit a grand slam and won the game, my heart. One that would forever be in the record books.

I need it back, her back. I’m ready to put the past in the past and start fresh.

My mind continues to spin; I can see our wedding playing out. I can see Jaylinn walking around a house, our house, bare foot and pregnant. I can picture a little girl with dark brown hair, blue eyes and looking just like Jaylinn.

I need that. I want all of that.

I decide to stop at the club and check in on things since I’m in town anyway. I park my bike around back and dig in my pocket for my keys to open the back door. The music is pulsing and I hear people singing along to the music.

I unlock the door to my office and put my helmet and jacket in there along with my wallet and phone. I close and lock the door behind me. I take a few steps down the hall and catch a glimpse of Jaylinn’s long dark hair. I stop where I am and watch her. She’s sitting in a booth with Eli, she leans forward, laughing again I can’t see her anymore so I quietly make my way over to them and step up next to the bar.

And then my heart stops, the world fades away. I try to take a breath but I can’t pull the air into my lungs because they’re frozen like the rest of me. Eli, my business partner and friend, just had his lips on Jaylinn. I grip the edge of the bar as the rage nestles itself deep inside me.

My blood pressure skyrockets, my face turns red and I begin to sweat. My body shakes from the rage fueled anger pulsing in my veins.

Both of them are oblivious to the fact I’m here as they continue to keep laughing at whatever it is they’re saying. Jaylinn’s head turns in my direction and she does a double take.

That’s when her eyes go wide and fear washes over her face, I see it right before me as she turns to Eli. Her lips move, as if she’s telling him I’m here.

My friend, if you can call him that now, looks over and I give a nod with my head for him to follow me. I don’t wait to see if he does because if he’s smart he will. I punch the door before unlocking my office and turn the light switch on.

Eli walks in with his hands on his hips, Jaylinn cowering behind him.

“You want to explain what the f**k I just saw?” I seethe.

Eli cocks an eyebrow. He can’t be serious.

“You were just kissing my motherfucking girl, Eli!” I lose my shit and start spitting words as fast as I can. I’m pissed, beyond pissed. “What the f**k? I leave for a few weeks and you swoop in for the f**king kill?” I bang my fist on my desk. I try to take a few deep breaths. I know I need to calm the f**k down, but I can’t, there’s no calming down from this. No way. Those breaths don’t work and I react. In one swoop I knock all the shit that’s on my desk to the floor. Glass from the picture frames shatter, paperwork everywhere. I don’t care. I hope it’s all f**king trashed beyond repair, just like me.

“Fuck!” I spin on him, getting in his face.

“You f**king promised you wouldn’t ever go after her. I f**king told you shit was complicated between us but you couldn’t help yourself, huh?”

I grip his shirt in my hands, ready to lay shit down when Jaylinn wedges her little body between ours and pushes against my chest.

“Stop it!” Jaylinn yells.

“You’re going to let her defend you?” I fume, not even looking at her. I’m staring at Eli, ready to wipe that goddamn look of his face.

Eli smirks, the mother f**ker smirks. “You about done?”

“Oh,” I laugh bitterly. “I’m just getting started, ass**le.” I lunge for him, my hands trying to get a hold of his shirt again.

Jaylinn pushes against my chest. “What the hell are you talking about?” Her eyes are wild with pain and fear. “I’m not your damn girl, you gave up that right!”

“I f**king saw you.” I yell at her, losing my temper. “I f**king saw you!”

Eli huffs, “Whatever you think you saw, it didn’t happen.”

“Fuck you! I saw it with my own eyes.” Reaching over Jaylinn, I shove Eli’s shoulder. “You kissed her.”

Eli, who is still just as cool as he was when he walked in here, takes a step back shaking his head. “I would never do that to you.”

Jaylinn gasps and pushes me hard against the wall. “I can’t believe you would ever think that I could do that to you.” Her nostrils flare. “You can’t stand to see me with anyone else and yet you can’t be with me! It’s one or the other Cooper, you want me or you don’t. You can’t have both.”

Jaylinn turns on her heel and storms from the room. I glance over to Eli who’s just shaking his head. “You better go after her.” He kicks the stapler out of his way. “And just for the record, I would never ever go after someone that is yours. I’m not that guy.”