Legal Briefs

“Come to me, Scheherazade,” he said with a cute smile. I joined him under the covers and took the book from him.

“I had a great time tonight,” I said, smiling back at him.

“I had a great time too,” he said, sliding down and lying on his side facing me. “We talked to each other for a long time and we didn’t fight, even though we didn’t have sex either. We’re getting better at this, Adler.”

“Yeah, well, baby steps,” I teased.

“You had to say ‘baby’.” He stared up at the ceiling dejectedly, but his mood improved a lot as I read to him. Eventually, I looked up and saw that my Shahryar was asleep.

Chapter Twenty-Six

It’s probably good that we got a full night’s sleep, because the next day was busy and crammed with details from the moment we got up. I was thankful for it, since it kept Adam distracted, and he didn’t obsess too much about the family gathering that evening.

He arranged to have Abby, who was living at home at the moment, come and apartment sit, telling her that he was staying with me for a little while because I might be a witness in a trial and he just wanted to make sure I was okay. We had decided that we wouldn’t go into detail because we didn’t want to worry his family.

He gathered together what he considered living essentials, clothes, toiletries, electronics, books and Phillies baseball memorabilia, and moved them in to my place. I was happy now for the fact that I had plenty of space. Adam and I would be shacking up even closer than the summer we had adjacent tents at Camp Ramah in the Poconos, and I hoped it would go better this time around than it did then.

He also brought me into the office for a few hours. He needed to prep cases so he could have more free time next week for other things, and it gave me a chance to meet people and start digging into the training materials more. He even hooked me up with some experienced prosecutors who gave me tips and helped me prepare for my argument against Jacob and my mom. By the end of the day I was feeling much more confident.

At sundown, we found ourselves in the living room of his cousin Rebekah and her husband Matt. With them was the smallest human being I had ever seen. Being an only child, I didn’t have a lot of experience with babies. Being the baby of the family, who had been away at school when his only nephew was born, Adam’s experience wasn’t exactly vast either. The events of the evening were obviously weighing heavily on his mind, as he couldn’t seem to stop squirming and every time he sat down he practically assumed the fetal position. I had to talk him out of wearing a protective cup.

I was introduced to various relatives, including Hannah’s little boy, Josh, and her husband, Nate, by a positively exuberant Debra Roth. She seemed thrilled to see me, despite the fact that she now knew far too much about my relationship with her only son. Mr. Mouth himself couldn’t even look his mother in the eye. I definitely needed to get him back on the horse that night, or we would wind up having to take old Mr. Davis up on that Viagra offer.

Adam’s relatives seemed fascinated by the fact that he had a girlfriend, especially four-year-old Josh, who announced that I was pretty and that he wanted to marry me. He also seemed very curious about something, and he kept approaching and then running away. Eventually, he worked up the nerve to raise the subject, as Adam and I sat chatting with his sisters in the dining room.

“My mom says I can’t take my dump trunk to bath time because there’s no room,” he informed me in a contemplative tone.

“Oh? Well, I’m sure she’s probably right,” I answered, smiling up at Hannah.

“So, how did you and Uncle Adam fit in the tub together at the same time?” he asked. Adam choked on the ginger ale he was sipping, and I saw the Roth girls exchange stunned, but highly amused, looks.

“Joshie! What are you saying?” Hannah asked, sounding embarrassed, but obviously trying not to laugh.

“Bubbe called Uncle Adam last night on the speaker phone, and he said they were going to take a bath together, and he was going to give her fominal sexing. What’s fominal sexing Mommy?”

“Joshua, sweetie,” Adam’s mom appeared at the door with a maniacal-looking smile, “we talked about this. Uncle Adam was just joking, and your daddy will explain it when you’re older.”

“What?!” Hannah exclaimed, aghast.

“I’m sorry, Hannah. I won’t use speaker phone anymore when Joshua is around,” Mrs. Roth replied apologetically.

“What are you apologizing for?” Sarah asked. “Adam! Why would you say something like that to your mother?”

“Let’s go find Daddy, honey,” Hannah said, hustling her son out of the room. Adam hid his face in his hands and made a sound like a wounded buffalo. We were never going to have sex again. I just knew it.

“He didn’t know it was me,” Mrs. Roth went on in a sweet motherly voice.

“Well, who in the hell did you think it was, Adam?” Abby asked with a laugh.

“Yeah, who would it have been appropriate to say that to?” Sarah added.

“Oh, what’s the big deal?’ Mrs. Roth said, coming to her baby boy’s defense. “It’s not like I didn’t know they were sleeping together. Maybe they’ll get married! Have you gotten to hold the baby yet, Lily? Sarah! Go get the baby!” she ordered.

“Maybe we should get Rabbi Stein in here too,” Abby said, sounding like she was having a wonderful time. I noted that Adam and Abby were very much alike, in looks and in personality.

“You’re coming for Thanksgiving, aren’t you, Lily?” Mrs. Roth asked.

“Um, sure, I guess. Is that okay with you?” I asked Adam. He looked up at me and was about to answer, I think in the affirmative.

“Of course it’s okay with him,” his mother answered firmly.

“Did I hear someone call me?” Rabbi Stein poked his head in.

“We were just talking about Adam and Lily getting married,” Mrs. Roth explained.

“You’re getting married?” the rabbi asked cheerfully.

“Uh …” I stammered. Adam looked like he might have become catatonic.

“Not yet,” Mrs. Roth answered helpfully.

“Ah, well you let me know when you need my services.” He smiled and popped back out just as Sarah was coming in with the baby.

She walked over and handed him to me. Adam snapped out of his trance and stared down at the little bundle in my arms. I looked down and froze, afraid that if I moved I might break him. The baby, not Adam.