Lavender and Old Lace
Page 78The next day, while Ruth was busily gathering up her few belongings and
packing her trunk, Winfield appeared with a suggestion regarding the
advisability of outdoor exercise. Uncle James stood at the gate and
watched them as they went down hill. He was a pathetic old figure,
predestined to loneliness under all circumstances.
"That's the way I'll look when we've been married a few years," said
Carl.
"Worse than that," returned Ruth, gravely. "I'm sorry for you, even
now."
"You needn't be proud and haughty just because you've had a wedding at
your house--we're going to have one at ours."
"At ours?"
"That's nice," answered Ruth, refusing to ask the question.
"It's Joe and Hepsey," he continued, "and I thought perhaps you might
stoop low enough to assist me in selecting an appropriate wedding gift
in yonder seething mart. I feel greatly indebted to them."
"Why, of course I will; it's quite sudden, isn't it?" "Far be it from
me to say so. However, it's the most reversed wedding I ever heard of.
A marriage at the home of the groom, to say the least, is unusual.
Moreover, the 'Widder' Pendleton is to take the bridal tour and leave
the happy couple at home. She's going to visit a relative who is distant
in both position and relationship--all unknown to the relative, I fancy.
She starts immediately after the ceremony and it seems to me that it
"Why, Carl! You don't want to maim her, do you?"
"I wouldn't mind. If it hadn't been for my ostrich-like digestion, I
wouldn't have had anything to worry about by this time. However, if you
insist, I will throw the rice and let you heave the shoes. If you have
the precision of aim which distinguishes your sex, the 'Widder' will
escape uninjured."
"Am I to be invited?"
"Certainly--haven't I already invited you?"
"They may not like it."
"That doesn't make any difference. Lots of people go to weddings who
aren't wanted."
permission to kiss the bride."
"Thank you, dear, but I'm not going to kiss any brides except my own.
I've signed the pledge and sworn off."
They created a sensation in the village when they acquired the set of
china which had been on exhibition over a year. During that time it had
fallen at least a third in price, though its value was unchanged. Ruth
bought a hideous red table-cloth, which she knew would please Hepsey,
greatly to Winfield's disgust.
"Why do you do that?" he demanded. "Don't you know that, in all
probability, I'll have to eat off of it? I much prefer the oilcloth, to
which I am now accustomed."