Kumo Desu ga, Nani ka?
Page 338Oni 10 Emptiness
I kill all noticeable living things.
I hate all moving things.
I even feel irritation to the shaking lead at the edge of my view.
My sense returned barely by the fight with the Sword God.
But, can this really be said that it returned?
I cut down the animal that seems to be harmless, and devour the meat greedily.
With this, I'm only a beast without sense.
No, even the beast won't do useless hunting when it's full, and I who kill all noticeable living things now is a only fiend that's lower than a beast.
I don't only kill animals.
I killed a lot of humans who ran away from me.
The man who faces me bravely, the woman who protect her child, the protected young child, and the old man who present his body to gain time. I killed all of them.
Why am I doing such a thing?
I don't know.
I feel nausea whenever I kill innocent people.
But, the killing intent and anger exceed it more.
The voice "Kill" echoes in my head.
I entrust to the anger and obey the words.
I feel unpleasant whenever I kill, and it becomes irritation like that. Then, it becomes the killing intent and becomes the driving force to look for the next prey.
The negative chain that drops to the very bottom.
I evolved into the Ogre General from High Ogre after defeating the Sword God.
I repeated massacre more from there, and evolved into an Oni.
Although there was the one called Ogre King in the evolution from the General, I chose this somehow.
The change was extreme.
My build that grew big whenever I evolve till then shrank into the normal human size instantly.
Although if it's that alone, it would be a little surprise, at the moment when I saw my appearance reflected in the water, I gulped.
My previous life's face was reflected there.
Two horns grew on my forehead and there was the impression that I became slightly virile, but that was the face of me in the past without a doubt.
Such an impression appeared in my head.
And, at the same time, I consented.
"Ah, I see. I returned back."
I evolved into the Oni, and the level of the skill called Taboo rose to 10.
And, the acquired Taboo was highly-destructive enough to break my heart.
I vomited gastric juice, rage recklessly, and started the massacre of the living things with a greater killing intent.
The every day ruled by the Wrath, and only kill.
Before acquiring Taboo, I despaired for not being able to stop my will while feeling guilty in killing innocent people.
My heart became slightly light after acquiring Taboo.
Because legitimacy was enacted in massacre.
In my such feelings, I get angry.
The wrath from the bottom of my heart that's not a temporary wrath brought by the skill.
What legitimacy.
Such a thing is only an appendix reason.
After all, it's only making an excuse by putting the indulgence called justice to the sins that I have done.
Although the Taboo's content was surely terrible, it doesn't become the reason that I can massacre.
It's the same.
The time when I met a person of the previous life.
I'm not wrong.
That's why, I may use violence.
The different one is that after I used violence, I only claimed that I'm not wrong.
The essence is the same.
Justifying my own crime with my rightness as a shield.
That's why, my appearance might be close to my appearance when I was a human.
In the previous life, the will was right and the violence was a crime.
In this world, the will was a crime and the violence was right.
I don't know what's right and wrong anymore.
Leaving both my will and rightness.
I want someone to stop me.
I want to return to that Goblin's village.
To that place where there's no need to think about both rightness and sin.
But, there's nothing there anymore.
The proud warriors and the strict and warm house, everything.
In addition, there's no one who can stop me anymore.
If I see the appraisal stone, my status has exceeded 10000 even if I don't use the Wrath.
I was able to repel the Ice Dragon that came to stop me without using the Wrath.
When I was a Goblin, I was taught that the Drake was a dangerous monster in the mountain range.
Even the Drake's high rank species, the Dragon can't stop me.
The present me is only a machine that kill all noticeable living things.
My will is not there, and there's only the anger without the empty inside.
I kill, eat, and look for the next.
I'm the existence of that much.
Is there a meaning for me to live?
It might be better if I didn't regain my consciousness in the fight by the Sword God.
Then, I was able to be reduced into an ordinary machine that doesn't think of anything in a true meaning.
Or if the Sword God killed me.
Ah, I see.
I already want to die.
In such a world, I don't want to live in such a state.
Why is this world so painful?
Why am I feeling so painful?
I don't know.
I want to die.
And yet, I can't die by my own will.
Chase the prey, kill it, and eat it.
I chase the group that tries to cross the mountain range.
I have the Country Destroyer title before I know it, and I have taken a lot of life in this side of the mountain range.
Because I continued moving while recalling the Sword God's movement, I acquired the Sword God title too.
The fact seemed to stain Reigar Van Rengzand somehow, and I felt sick.
I lost sight of the group that I chased after crossing the mountain range.
Well, it doesn't matter.
I didn't chase them because I wanted to kill them.
Rather, I'm glad that I lost sight of them.
And yet, I was attacked by a mystery group.
It was a strange group that used magic and the bow as the main different from the knights that I fought before and the warrior group without unity that I fought before that.
I acquired the Fairy Killer after killing them, and when I tore off their clothes to checked their identity, it was the race with pointed ears.
It's the race that seems to be called as the Elves in the Earth.
Although it was unknown why they attacked me, they died in vain.
Although the Elves were considerably strong, they were not my enemy.
There might not be someone who can kill me anymore.
It can't be helped that I began to give up like that.
But, it was still early to give up.
In front of me, a girl stands in my way.
The mouth smiles, the eyes are flaming, and it fills my fighting spirit.
It was a presence like a man-eating fiend that's unimaginable from her looks and elegant dress.
I sense it.
This girl is strong.
To the extent that I can be killed.
And, I had a light expectation.