Inside (Bulletproof 1)
Page 46“Mess” was the perfect segue. Taking hold of Virgil’s medallion, which hung around her neck, she gathered her nerve and confronted her guilt. “There’s just one…problem.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m afraid I have…something to tell you. Something you won’t like.”
“About…?”
A tear escaped. She wasn’t used to being in this position, had always been so cautious to avoid censure. Terrified that she’d lose everything she’d worked so hard for, she clutched the medallion more tightly. She had only herself to blame…. “Virgil Skinner.”
“You said he was fine.”
“He is, but…I’ve had an inappropriate relationship with him,” she blurted out. Stunned silence.
“Rick?” she ventured.
“Does inappropriate mean what I think it means?” he asked.
Leaping to her feet, she began to pace. She considered trying to explain how deeply Virgil affected her, but she refused to offer excuses, especially that one. She didn’t want to acknowledge that he held any power over her. Wallace wouldn’t care to hear it, anyway, and probably wouldn’t understand the compelling nature of what she felt for Virgil. She didn’t even understand it. “Yes.”
“You slept with him?”
Her stomach muscles cramped. “Yes.” More than once. “Why? My God, you’re so uptight about rules and doing what’s right, I never dreamed you’d do something like this. You barely met him!”
She flinched. “I know.”
He covered the phone and hollered, “Mind your own business,” and she imagined the shock of those who must’ve overheard his part of the conversation. She almost asked him to wait until he was in his car before they finished discussing this, but he was already railing at her, as if he didn’t care whether or not he made a spectacle of himself. “I can’t believe this! Maybe if you were someone else I could see it. Your friend Michelle is so hungry for a good screw she nearly salivates when she meets a prospective—”
He continued as though she hadn’t interrupted. “But not you. Nothing shakes you.”
“Unlike Michelle, I haven’t just been through a painful divorce.”
It didn’t seem to matter what she said. “While we were at the library, you and Skinner didn’t even seem to like each other.”
She fingered Virgil’s medallion again, felt the heat of it. “I’m sorry.”
The tenor of his voice changed, suddenly dropped. “He didn’t force you, did he?”
She wondered if he’d be willing to forgo this investigation if she answered in the affirmative but she wasn’t going to make Virgil look bad just to test Rick. “No.”
“Not at all?”
“Not at all.”
The protracted silence became almost unbearable. “I haven’t told the warden yet,” she said. “I didn’t want to wake him. But…I’ll talk to him in the morning.”
“No, you won’t.”
She stopped pacing. “What?”
“He doesn’t even know Skinner’s—Bennett’s—an ex-con. And keeping it from him was your idea, remember?”
“It was your idea first. You lied to all of us.”
“I realize that. It’s not too late. Maybe it’s time for full disclosure.”
“No. Don’t tell Fischer or anyone else anything, do you understand?”
“I don’t think so. I’m not proud of what I’ve done but I feel I should accept the consequences.”
“Consequences…” He laughed bitterly. “Let me tell you what the consequences will be. They’ll begin with several uncomfortable meetings where you’ll have to explain your conduct in detail.”
She winced. “I’m prepared to be honest.”
“Even if it puts an end to any career advancement for the next decade or two?”
Refusing to let him undermine her courage, she squared her shoulders. “I can’t base the truth on what the punishment will be.”
“Shit!”
“What?”
“You’re not the only one it’ll affect.”
“Excuse me?”
“Even if this narrows future opportunities, your reputation will work in your favor. That means you’ll probably retain your post, at least for the time being. Instead of canning you, they’ll yank Virgil.”
She experienced a flash of relief. This was what she’d been hoping to achieve when she called him. Virgil wouldn’t be incarcerated, and she wouldn’t be tempted anymore. “Then they’ll yank Virgil.”
He was already writing his acceptance speech for his next promotion. “Maybe putting a stop to the investigation as it stands would be the right thing. I’m not sure Virgil will be safe at Pelican Bay.”
His voice rose. “You did this to get what you wanted from the start!”
“That’s not true!”
“Isn’t it? You never liked the idea.”
“That doesn’t mean I’d sabotage it!”
“Then listen. You’ve reported your behavior. I’ve reprimanded you, you’ve promised you’ll never make that mistake again and now it’s over. Forget it.”
She nearly dropped the phone. “Forget it? That’s it?”
“Yeah. Consider your conscience clear. Who cares whether or not you were together? It doesn’t affect anything. You think I’m going to toss this whole investigation because you wanted to get laid by a piece of prison trash?”
Peyton ground her teeth. “He’s not prison trash, Rick. He didn’t kill his stepfather. He’s no different than you or me.”
“Yes, he is, Peyton. He’s killed. That makes him a whole lot different. If you don’t think he’s dangerous you’re wrong.”
“You don’t know him.”
“Neither do you! One cheap lay and you’re an expert on this guy? Are you really that infatuated with him?”
She remembered how Virgil had treated her at the motel. “No,” she said, but then she tried to be more honest, since that had been her intent in the first place. “I don’t think so. It’s all a bit confusing. I…I don’t want anyone to be hurt.”