Home Tears

And then Jonah gave me a second gift. He whispered that Mae was alive, and my tears broke free at that moment. A fist curled against his chest, and he merely held me longer. My knees were unsteady. My knees were always unsteady around him. I’d grown used to it, but my knees gave out in that moment.

Jonah gave Trenton a side-hug. He gave Jake a tap on the shoulder, but then he swept me up and carried me to a private corner.

Julia and the others huddled with blankets, watching for more bubbles.

We stayed there as more divers popped up. They helped ready the others. Even Trenton. His hands and arms grew weak. He needed help getting the mask on. Then all of them dove back in.

Jonah held me against his chest with his arms around my front. He whispered into my neck, “I—I thought you were gone.”

“I thought I was supposed to go.”

His arms tightened. He dropped a kiss to my shoulder. “There’s a lot that I want to talk to you about, but before I lose the chance to say it—I am in love with you.”

The magic of dancing herbs and magical spices burst forth in me.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

Jonah laughed. “Not the response I was going for.”

“No, I mean—thank you.” For giving me that spark back. For being the first one to give that spark back to me. I turned in his arms and grasped his face. “I love you, too.”

I had hope.

Jonah helped me get that back, and it wasn’t something I could tell. It wasn’t a feeling that could be explained. I left home with no hope, and I returned to get that hope again. I had it now, and it took a demolished town to realize it was there—inside me—the whole time.

“Thank you.” This time, I spoke to my mother and my sister. They were around. They told Julia to go south, even though Julia would never admit it. All sorts of channels will open in times of crisis, and that’s when belief can come flooding in.

Jonah and I swam back out and were welcomed with warmed blankets. Jake grabbed me in a bone-crushing hug before he set me back down and returned to Julia’s side. And I knew that my sister changed when she offered me a smile—an actual smile and looked content as Jake wrapped his arms around her once more.

Later, Julia would tell me that she received a phone call. Aunt Kathryn died nineteen minutes before the first wave crashed into Craigstown.

I’ve thought about that quite a bit since then. And the way I envisioned it—she merely closed her eyes, her hands folded over her chest, peaceful, as the first wave took her body. It was almost a beautiful way to go.

Through the rest of that summer and into the fall, Craigstown was rebuilt. It went a lot faster because of the grey pearls. Those little mussels came in useful when they were needed. In some way, it was like they were meant to be discovered when they were. There were a lot of other heroes hailed from the flood, but I was one of them. I didn’t run this time. I didn’t want to run, and I knew that whatever was broken inside had healed.

You see, I was my own monster. When you don’t have hope, something can grow inside of you that will just keep hurting, biting, snarling. You sink farther, and eventually the monster will overtake you.

Some people don’t fight back. They might hurt others, hurt themselves, or relinquish the fight for happiness.

I can’t explain what happened or how it happened, but learning my family’s secrets helped me learn who I was inside. I gained perspective and realized it wasn’t me. I wasn’t the one who screwed everything up. I wasn’t the ‘defect.’

It was them.

It was the lies that tore apart my family—that kept my sisters and me from banding together. We stood no chance as children, but now that I know everything—God help me, I was piecing my home back together.

Julia and I started slowly, but by the last brick that cemented Craigstown—she stood at my side. We even visited Sandra together. Mae still wouldn’t go, but that’s her fight with her own mother.

I just know that if my mom were alive, nothing would keep me from her side. Not anymore.

Boone returned to his own home and to his own story. He did me a favor and took his family with him.

A part of my heart wanted to reach out to him, but the truth was that I hadn’t had a heart to give him before. And now that I did, Jonah already claimed ownership. If it hadn’t been Jonah, if I’d never survived the first storm and returned home, I couldn’t tell you what would’ve happened between Boone and me. All I know, his name will always be Boone for me, and a part of me will always wish that I could’ve loved him as he deserved to be.

That just meant that someone else was meant for him. He’ll fit with her how Jonah fits with me. How Jake and Julia seem to fit. Aiden and Bubba. Kate and Robbie—yes, finally! And how Mae confessed that she fit with Jeffries.

That’s one of my last revelations.

Mae always knew he was my father. He loved my mom, but he folded under pressure and married his wife. He had the dolphin emblazoned on his wedding ring because he truly wanted to make his marriage work.

He tried and failed. My mom was around the corner. Mae was the one who explained it, but she didn’t need to. I was aware that life’s never simple, especially in adult years.

His story is meant for another time, but it ended sadly and bitterly because when he’d left his wife—my mom had undergone her last round of chemotherapy. He arrived to her hospital room to see her fingers fall lifeless as they were curled with mine.

I’d been sleeping, but I woke up. ns class="adsbygoogle" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">