Hold on Tight
Page 16I opened the door to find Dewayne instead. Not who I wanted to see this morning. Not at all.
“We need to talk,” he said, stepping inside like he owned the place. He may own a lot of things, but this house was mine.
I left the door open because I didn’t like the idea of being closed up inside with him. I was mad at him. My arm had a black-and-blue bruise on it in the shape of his massive hand. I had taken ibuprofen last night and kept my arm on ice. Didn’t seem to help. It hurt and it looked awful.
“Last night—” he said, then stopped as his eyes zeroed in on my bruised arm. I watched as he went pale, and I wasn’t sure if he was going to pass out. It was ugly, but it wasn’t that ugly.
“Holy f**k,” he swore, walking over to me and taking my wrist gently in his hand so he could lift my tender arm and look at it. “I did this,” he said.
I just nodded. Who else did he think had grabbed me like he wanted to break me last night?
“I need to be shot,” he said as he gently touched his fingertip to the marred skin. It was like a feather and, instead of hurting, caused me to shiver. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’d never hurt you. Know that. I would never hurt you. I didn’t know it was you last night when you slapped me, and I had drunk too damn much. My mind was slow, and it took me too long to register that it was you. God, Sienna, I’m so sorry.”
His voice sounded so pained that I had to fight the urge to comfort him. Maybe slapping a man his size with his temper from behind had been a bad idea. . . .
“It’s okay,” I told him, then tugged my hand free of his and put some space between us.
“No, it’s not. That isn’t okay,” he said, and his hands fisted up. “That will never happen again. I swear it. I’ll f**king stop drinking. That shit is not okay. Ever.”
Micah would be here soon, and after seeing Dewayne’s reaction to my arm, I needed to change into something with longer sleeves. Micah would be upset too. I didn’t want him scared of his uncle.
“Why are you here?” I asked, wanting him to get to the point before my son showed up.
“I came to talk about last night. To explain why I went to check out your date. But, shit, I can’t get past your arm. I was worried about Cam, and I was the one who f**king hurt you. Did he know I did that?”
I nodded.
Dewayne’s face darkened. “Fucker should have hit me. You need a man with some balls, and that dipshit knew I hurt you and didn’t even come after me.”
Was he kidding? Did he think everything should be handled with violence? And why was that so incredibly hot? I needed to seek mental help. Violence was not sexy. Even if Dewayne’s muscles flexed when he was just talking about a fight.
“You need to leave,” I told him before I could say something stupid.
I stopped talking as Dewayne took two steps toward me until he was towering over me. Then his larger-than-life hands cupped my face, and before anything could register, his lips were on mine.
I reached up and grabbed his arms to keep myself from melting into a puddle on the floor. Dewayne Falco’s mouth was very talented, and the second his tongue slipped along my bottom lip, I opened up for him and was lost. The minty taste of him consumed me as he nibbled and explored my mouth. I just held on. It was all I could do. My entire body was under his command. I couldn’t think coherently. Nothing had ever been like this. Ever.
But then, I had only kissed one other. And we had just been kids then.
Dewayne’s hands slipped down my back and cupped my bottom as he lifted me higher up against his body. His tongue danced along and teased mine, driving me crazy.
A moan came from somewhere, but I wasn’t sure whose it was. He heard it too, and it was like ice water over the fire that he’d wrapped us inside. Before I could steady myself, I was back on the ground and Dewayne was putting the length of my living room between us. I grabbed the chair behind me and hoped I didn’t sway on my feet.
Dewayne’s eyes were wild as he breathed heavily. At least he seemed as affected as I was. Because I was affected. No, I was marked. For life. I may not have been kissed by anyone other than Dustin before this, but I knew that no one was ever going to compare to what I’d just experienced.
“We can’t. I shouldn’t have,” Dewayne said, shaking his head. Then he all but ran out of my house. I stood there and listened to his truck door close and the engine start up. I stood there long after his truck had pulled out of my driveway.
He hadn’t been able to get away from me fast enough. It wasn’t like I had asked him to kiss me. Had he expected me to push him away? Was I a bad kisser? Had that moan been mine, and he had been turned off?
God! I hated being so damn clueless at this.
“Momma? Why is the door open?” Micah’s voice asked, and I snapped out of my daze and turned to see my little boy frowning at me.
“Because I was waiting on you,” I replied, not missing a beat.
He smiled and ran over to me, and I was careful to hide my bruised arm as I hugged him.
“Did you have fun?” I asked.
He nodded but pulled back and looked up at me. “I missed you this morning. Mama T offered to make me biscuits, but I wanted to come home and eat Pop-Tarts with you. I remembered you didn’t have work today.”
Hillary had given me one Saturday off a month, and I was very thankful for that this morning. After what had just happened, leaving Dewayne at my house to watch Micah would have been hard and distracting.
“I can do better than Pop-Tarts. How about pancakes?” I asked him.
“Sounds perfect,” I said. “Let me go change shirts and we will get to work.”
I didn’t let him see me long enough to see my arm before I slipped out of the kitchen and into my bedroom, where I put on a long-sleeve T-shirt.
DEWAYNE
She was Dustin’s. She would always be Dustin’s.
Why the f**k had I kissed her? Goddamn, I wasn’t going to be able to forget that. She’d been so damn sweet and hot all at once. Almost like she was innocent, when I knew she wasn’t. She had a kid. She wasn’t innocent, and she’d melted into my arms so easily. I had wanted to get her as close to me as f**king possible.
Then she’d moaned, and my dick had gone so hard it had almost broken the damn zipper on my jeans. Fuck, but she was a sexy moaner. If I hadn’t gotten away from her, I would have ended up f**king her on the sofa. The image of Sienna n**ed and wrapped around me sprang to mind, and I hit the steering wheel and cursed. I needed a f**king cigarette. Why did that shit have to kill you? Giving up alcohol was going to be a hell of a lot easier.
I couldn’t do this shit. She was Micah’s mom. She wasn’t someone I could f**k for fun and walk away from. And after today I wasn’t sure I could f**k her and walk away from her. Hell, not tasting her mouth again was going to kill me. No wonder my brother had knocked her up. Fuck! I wouldn’t have been able to keep my wits about me when I was between her legs either. Damn woman could make any man lose his mind.
Dustin would want Sienna happy and taken care of. He would want her to have the life she deserved. Not one with his loser older brother, who had made more f**king mistakes than the average person. Hell, I’d bruised her arm. How the f**k did someone hurt Sienna? I wasn’t drinking ever again. I was done. If that was the kind of shit I did, I wasn’t touching alcohol. Sienna and Micah were going to turn me into the damn Pope.
Micah deserved a man in his life he could look up to. I would be the uncle who doted on him and made him feel loved, but I wasn’t really much to look up to. I wasn’t that guy. I never was and never would be good enough for Sienna Roy and my nephew. She needed a man who could be with just her. Who didn’t need easy, no-strings f**ks. And Micah needed a stable uncle. One who was a good role model. One who didn’t f**king hurt his momma. Motherfucker! I wanted to beat my own ass. Sienna’s bruised arm turned my stomach. I’d done that to her. I was the worthless piece of shit I knew wasn’t worthy enough to kiss those sweet lips of hers.
Then I’d kissed her. What the hell! What kind of message did that send? Not a good one. Surely she knew I wasn’t for her. I wasn’t for anyone. I would have to talk to Sienna and apologize. She needed to understand that I couldn’t be what she needed. I wasn’t that guy. I would be there for them, I would be her friend, I would take care of them—but that was all I was good for. Nothing more.
A knock on my window startled me, and I turned to see Marcus Hardy frowning at me. I had parked in the lot of my apartment building, but I hadn’t gotten out. I opened the door and stepped out of the truck.
“What was that about?” Marcus asked.
“What?” I asked, trying to blow off whatever it was he’d seen.
Marcus cocked an eyebrow at me. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the snarling and cursing and hitting your steering wheel.”
Shit. He’d been there a while.
“Nothing,” I replied, and started walking to my apartment. I knew Marcus would follow me.
Shit. Preston gossiped like a damn woman.
I nodded and pulled out my keys to unlock my apartment door.
“Kid’s Dustin’s, then?” Marcus said, walking into my apartment behind me. Marcus would have this conversation by himself until I spoke up. He wouldn’t leave. That wasn’t Marcus. He was persistent.
“Yeah. Micah’s my nephew.”
Marcus nodded and went and made himself comfortable on the couch.
“She giving you a hard time? If I remember right, you sure had a lot of interest in her back in the day. You got sent to alternative school for a month after beating the shit out of that guy who had cornered her in the hallway and was touching her while she tried to push him away. Broke the kid’s nose.”
Alternative school had sucked. It was for the thugs who screwed up so bad they took them out of the regular school and sent them to something like a boot camp. Luckily, there had been witnesses who vouched that the guy was touching Sienna inappropriately and that he’d taken two swings at me. One had actually given me a black eye, so it hadn’t all been completely my fault. He’d done alternative school with a busted nose.
“She was a kid. She needed someone to take care of her. Too damn pretty for her own good.”
Marcus let out a small laugh. “She was more than pretty, from what I remember, but she was Dustin’s. Or so you always said. Although Dustin chose to ignore her for weeks until he finally saw just how much attention she was getting.”
“Don’t,” I warned him. He knew I didn’t let anyone talk bad about my brother. Ever. He’d been a kid and he’d made some bad decisions, but he’d had a good heart. And he’d been destined to be great.
Marcus sighed. “I loved Dustin. You know that. I wasn’t talking bad about him. I’d never do that.”
“I know,” I replied. I was just being defensive because I’d almost f**ked Sienna and all I could think about was going back and tasting her again.
“Sienna letting you get to know Micah?”
I nodded. She was being more than awesome about that. Letting him stay the night at my parents’ had made my mother’s year. Momma had called to tell me everything they did and everything Micah said. She adored that kid, and she adored his mother.
Another reason I had to stay away from Sienna. I couldn’t upset my mother. My dad would likely beat my ass. And I’d let him.