Here Be Sexist Vampires
Page 59“That’s Winston Jones, but he changes his name near enough every time the wind changes course. He’s High Master over Australia, New Zealand, and Indonesia and all the little surrounding islands. Older than Antonio by a couple of decades. He’s known mostly for having the largest harem.”
“Go on, how many consorts?”
“Over eighty.”
I grimaced. “That’s bad, worse than man-boobs.”
Jared laughed. “Don’t talk about tits. I’m having a hard time ignoring yours.”
“That’s because you’re perverted.”
“No, it’s because I want you, and you’re making it really hard to resist you when you come here dressed like that.”
“Er, excuse me, I did not turn up here like this for your benefit. I was at a restaurant, and you snatched me from it, remember. Now let’s get back to this file. So, what’s this bloke’s gift?”
“Nothing uncommon. Winston can levitate, but he can levitate quite high.”
“What side do you think he’ll align himself with?”
“It’s hard to say. Winston’s weird like that. One minute he’s laughing and joking with you but then the slightest thing changes his mood.”
Jared frowned at the jibe but then his smile quickly returned. “Winston’s quite impulsive. I think his decision will just depend on how he’s feeling at the exact moment that he realises he has to choose a side or back out.”
The next photograph was of a Keja vampire of Japanese origin. He was neither smiling nor frowning; his expression and posture was very relaxed and reserved, and I imagined him to be a very cool, collected person. In this respect, he made me think of Antonio.
“He calls himself Bran,” said Jared. “He’s a Keja. He’s always been a close friend of Antonio’s, they have the same Sire. There’s no doubt where his allegiance will lie.”
“Good.”
“He’s High Master over Japan, China, and Africa among other places. Quiet and respectful. He makes me think of a librarian. Doesn’t like Connelly much, I think that’s because Connelly talks so much.”
“And what’s in his bag of tricks?”
“He’s an Ecological Empath; he has a psychic sensitivity to his surrounding environment.” His bad-boy smile was suddenly back. “Want to have a rummage in my bag of tricks? You never know what might pop up.”
“Jared,” I growled in warning, but it didn’t have much humph behind it seen as I was giggling at the same time.
Wearing a crooked, sexy grin, he said, “Joke.” But his tone and the intensity of his gaze completely contradicted that. I swallowed. The horniness continues...
The next vampire looked a lot like Butch with his neat hairdo and the devilish tint to his eyes. Unlike Butch he seemed to like facial piercings; his nose, eyebrows, lips and ears all either had hoops or studs decorating them. His smile revealed a couple of gold teeth. He didn’t photograph very well. I have to say, though I’m not very photogenic myself. In human years, he was probably the oldest of all the High Masters.
“You don’t like him,” I detected.
Jared shrugged. “He thinks he’s a hard-case but really it’s all a big act. I can’t stand people like that. He’s High Master over the US and Mexico. He’ll, without a doubt, support Antonio. He likes to think of himself as good friends with Antonio, he’s a real bad kiss-ass.”
“As long as he fights with Antonio I don’t care if he goes as far as to lodge himself permanently up Antonio’s arse. Gift?”
“Shape-shifting. And it’s not restricted; he can shift into whatever living thing he touches.”
“Maybe Ricardo isn’t so bad after all.”
“I’m sorry to destroy your fantasy but you’re not his type. He’s a fan of plump, curvy females with big butts. You’ll see what I mean when you get a glimpse of his consort.”
“So, basically, his taste is the opposite of yours.” Before he could make an impish comment I quickly asked, “So at some point you’ll speak to every vampire in this file.”
He nodded. “That’s right. They’ll come over, ask how Antonio’s doing and to pass on their regards, that kind of thing. It’s just exchanging pleasantries to show respect for Antonio.”
“Right.”
On the last photograph a very grim looking vampire was staring back at me. He made me think of an army sergeant or something. His face and neck were covered in scars and tattoos and had a beard of stubble, giving him quite a rugged appearance. He didn’t look in the least bit welcoming.
“His gift?”
“He can petrify any plant, animal or even human – totally turning them to stone.”
“Well he’s just gone up in my estimations.”
“He’ll probably be very pleased with you. Likes the slender but shapely type. Not approving of Joy.”
I couldn’t help smiling at that. “Well that’s because a lot of blokes like to be able to hold what they can see.”
His expression became all bad-boyish and spoke of utter mischief. “I’d certainly like to hold what I can see right now.” He brushed my hair over my shoulder and leant over to my ear. “Sam,” he breathed. “You know you want this.”
I rose and took a step to the side so that I was standing in front of the neighbouring seat, taunting him more than anything else. He left his chair and advanced toward me, perching one butt cheek on the table.
Grinning, he held up his index finger. “Now that is something you can’t do tomorrow night. You’ll be posing as my consort; no one will believe that if you’re shifting away from me. Speaking of, you know consort decorum, right?”
I groaned and rolled my eyes. “I was Victor’s for three years, what do you think?”
“I know, but that was when you were travelling in lower class circles. This gathering will be full of the big boys, there’s a certain standard they expect. Number one: you cannot leave my side without asking permission. Where I go, you follow. Number two: you don’t speak to anyone unless they speak to you first. They’ll speak about you to me, that’s different. Unless they address you, you keep zipped. Number three: you don’t argue with anything at all that I say. I know that goes against your very nature, but you have to be a good girl.”