Here Be Sexist Vampires

If I’d known all of this before meeting Victor and Clark, I’d have killed them both myself. I couldn’t imagine having to watch someone I cared about go through something like that, especially while I could do nothing to stop it. Something like that would stay with you forever.

“I tried to run away from Victor by myself after that,” she said, her voice steady again now. “He’d told me that if I ever tried it he’d kill one human every day until I was returned to him. I hadn’t believed him. I was caught two weeks later by a Pagori who had a similar gift to Salem’s but not as powerful. When I was conscious again I was back with Victor and at the other side of the room were fourteen dead human bodies, most of them just kids. I didn’t try it again after that. At least not until Sebastian showed up. I knew Victor would be too busy following me here to be bothering killing humans.”

It was only now that I was getting a true idea of just why it was so important to her to be her own person. She had basically spent the past three years as a hostage, sex slave and assassin. I admired her for being stood in front of me right now. A lot of people would have tried to end their own existence rather than live that kind of life. “That’s what you meant when you said to the guys that they had no right to forget their pasts.”

She nodded. “In a nutshell, Bryce died because he loved me. Trying to forget that would be the biggest insult to him and his memory.”

“You really did love him.” As unreasonable, strange and seemingly idiotic as it was, I felt a twinge of jealousy at the idea.

“I’m not going to lie and say I thought we were going to be together forever. Sometimes people love each other for a little while. But I did love him, yeah. Look where it got him.”

“Hey, the blame doesn’t lie with you. You have to know that.”

“Do you know what’s the saddest part of it all? Bryce hadn’t wanted to go to the club that night that we saw Victor. I’d been all packed ready to move into a new flat in the other end of London the next morning, and I’d said I wanted to go to that club one last time. Funny how one decision can lead to so many different things. I might never have been Turned into a vampire, Bryce might still be alive -”

“Or you could have met Victor at a later date and had the same thing still happen.” I advanced toward her, but not attempting to penetrate that dome she had created around herself. “You can’t go thinking stupid shit like that. They’re the kind of things that Victor might have said to you. I’ll bet he’s looking up at you right now, listening to this and laughing about it. This would be exactly what he wants.”

She smiled a grim smile. “Victor already got what he wanted; he said the ‘experience’ should teach me not to want to love someone ever again. It did. I’ve never wanted anything like that since. It hurts to love someone. I couldn’t ever again watch someone I loved die.”

I couldn’t watch her in pain anymore. For the second time tonight I held her. Tight. She didn’t resist like I’d thought she might. With her palms flat against my chest, she had tucked her head under my chin. How could it feel this good just to have your arms around someone? I’d say I was getting just as much comfort from this as she was.

I’d never seen Sam look vulnerable before. Even now, though, there was still an air of strength about her. She was the last person I know who would need protecting, but she made me want to shield her from everything. She brought out this protective side of me that I hadn’t even known I had. I lightly kissed her hair and squeezed her even tighter.

The moment was shattered by the heavy knock on her apartment door. “Sam, it’s Max.”

Oh, great. Had I ever wanted to smash his face in as much as I did right now? I loosened my hold on her, expecting her to dash to greet him.

Sam sighed as she took a single step backwards. “I know he means well but I just can’t deal with him fussing right now.”

If she had any clue as to how happy I was to hear her say that she’d laugh her ass off. “Then don’t answer. He’ll get the idea.” I held her tight again. And again, there was no resistance from her. Max knocked again but, as I’d suggested, she ignored him. At that, he went away. Happy days.

“You’re good at hugging,” she said after a minute or so of silence.

I chuckled. “Thanks, I can’t say I’ve had much practice at it. You’re comfortable to hug.”

“You seem to like my hair as well.”

Subconsciously I had begun stroking her hair. In my defence, it’s so soft and beautiful. Like her. “Want me to stop?” She shook her head. So I didn’t stop. I combed through it with my fingers, enjoying the silky feel of it against my skin. I’ll swear she was close to purring. But then she squirmed a little, and I thought she was about to free herself. I was wrong. In fact, she was sliding her hands up my chest and reaching for the collar of my shirt. One button open. Another button open. And then there was the unbelievable feeling of her lips on my skin. Not kissing, just lingering there. That was enough to make me hitch in a breath. She kissed the spot beneath the hollow of my throat and I shuddered a little. Her lips then slowly began to work up the column of my throat, dabbing it with light kisses. She then gave it a little lick and exhaled heavily over the wet spot before scraping her teeth over it, causing me to quiver again. My downstairs department rose to attention.

I’m not much of a person for ethics and morals when it comes to sex, but a feeling struck me just then that had me questioning whether I wanted this now. It wasn’t so much me that she wanted; it was comfort that she was looking for right now, and I didn’t want us sleeping together to be about that. Voicing this view, however, was proving to be a struggle seen as I was sort of caught up in the sensation of her lips and tongue and teeth on my skin. Then she grinded against me. Not helpful.

As such, all that came out was: “Sam, you have to stop.” I can’t say that I sounded all that convincing, especially seen as I was clutching her close to me.

“Why?” she murmured against my neck. “You want me.” As if to emphasise her point, she grinded against my raging erection again, and a low moan escaped me.

Her lips worked their way around my entire neck, her tongue lightly flicking out each time, her teeth nibbling. There wasn’t one part of it that she didn’t kiss. Christ, I had to make her stop now. I was too close to thinking ‘comfort sex it is’.