Hard Love (Hacker 5)

The day was coming to a close and I scrolled through the email on my phone, eager for anything to take my mind off this mess.

“You should go home.” Dean circled his desk and tossed my coat on my lap.

“You’re kicking me out?”

“It’s been a long day. Go home and be with Erica. I’m sure she’s still pretty rattled over this.”

“You’d be right,” I muttered.

“She didn’t want to leave the station until they were done with you yesterday. I tried to put her mind at ease, but I knew she wasn’t having it.”

“Doesn’t surprise me.”

I worked my jaw, battling with my empathy and the person in me who’d never bent on this matter. I’d go home to Erica and we’d pick up where we left off this morning, which wasn’t a moment I was exactly proud of. Leaving her before we could talk things through. She’d cornered me, stood up to me. Not that any of that surprised me. She’d always had her own mind. I had seen that fire in her when she walked into my boardroom months ago. I never wanted to put out that flame. I wanted her to burn for me, fight for us, and that’s exactly what she was doing.

Dean dropped back down into his chair and cocked his head. “I have to say, I was curious to finally meet the woman who meant enough to you to skip the pre-nup, despite all my best advice. I only wish it had been under different circumstances.”

“Me too.”

Dean’s half joke reminded me that I’d agreed to share everything with Erica. I’d demanded it, despite her misgivings. Not just the wealth, but the joys and burdens too. A voice of reason reminded me that as much as we tried to battle our demons in private, it never worked out that way in the end. As determined as I was to go to war with Evans on my own, Erica and I had bound ourselves too tightly for that.

With our earlier argument still weighing on me, I left Dean’s office and made my way down to the street. The sun had gone down. The days were shorter, the nights colder. Except my nights were never cold when Erica was with me. God, I couldn’t get her out of my head. We were on two sides of a line and she kept calling me over. I wanted to relent, but something held me back. I walked the streets of downtown Boston until I was in front of my office. The windows were dark.

I pushed through the doors and let myself into the empty bullpen. I flipped on the lights, revealing the wasteland of our office. Every desk was a mess. Wires had been pulled and were strewn around the floor. Cady had called earlier, confirming that the authorities had confiscated all the machines in our office. But somehow seeing it in person stirred up a new kind of rage. Toward Evans. Toward all those faces I’d grown to hate when I was a teenager. It hadn’t seemed fair then and it sure as hell didn’t feel fair now, when I hadn’t done a goddamn thing to warrant it.

“You okay?”

I turned, and James was standing in the doorway.

“What the fuck do you think?”

He shook his head and backed away. “Sorry, man. I’ll leave you alone.”

I released the tension in my fists. “It’s all right. It’s just been a rough day. Sorry.”

He nodded and took a step closer, surveying the damage. “Alli told us what went down. It’s fucked up.” He hesitated, his focus landing on me. “You look like you could use a drink.”

That much was true. Though it wouldn’t get me any closer to resolution on the matters at hand. “Thanks, but I should get back home. It’s getting late. Erica’s probably wondering where I’ve been.”

He frowned.

“What?”

“Well . . . she left this afternoon,” he said.

“What do you mean?”

“She came in this morning with a bag, she and Alli met in her office for a bit, and then they took off for the airport together. Alli said they’d be back in a day or two. Said to email if anything came up with work.”

I balled my hands into tight fists again. This day just kept getting better. “Do you have any idea where they went?”

His eyes were wide then. “No idea. She didn’t stick around long enough for me to ask her about it.”

“Fuck.” My vision turned white with anger.

“Have you called her?”

“I have to go,” I said, pushing past him.

I sped home, calling her phone repeatedly only to hear her voicemail time after time. I barreled through the front door, half expecting to find Erica there. But the house was quiet and dark. I went to the kitchen, explored every room on the first floor, and then went to our bedroom. She was gone. The bed was how we’d left it, except for a piece of paper on my pillow.