Great Expectations

It was clear that I must repair to our town next day, and in the first

flow of my repentance, it was equally clear that I must stay at Joe's.

But, when I had secured my box-place by to-morrow's coach, and had been

down to Mr. Pocket's and back, I was not by any means convinced on the

last point, and began to invent reasons and make excuses for putting

up at the Blue Boar.

I should be an inconvenience at Joe's; I was not

expected, and my bed would not be ready; I should be too far from

Miss Havisham's, and she was exacting and mightn't like it. All other

swindlers upon earth are nothing to the self-swindlers, and with such

pretences did I cheat myself. Surely a curious thing. That I should

innocently take a bad half-crown of somebody else's manufacture is

reasonable enough; but that I should knowingly reckon the spurious coin

of my own make as good money! An obliging stranger, under pretence of

compactly folding up my bank-notes for security's sake, abstracts the

notes and gives me nutshells; but what is his sleight of hand to mine,

when I fold up my own nutshells and pass them on myself as notes!

Having settled that I must go to the Blue Boar, my mind was much

disturbed by indecision whether or not to take the Avenger. It was

tempting to think of that expensive Mercenary publicly airing his boots

in the archway of the Blue Boar's posting-yard; it was almost solemn to

imagine him casually produced in the tailor's shop, and confounding

the disrespectful senses of Trabb's boy. On the other hand, Trabb's boy

might worm himself into his intimacy and tell him things; or, reckless

and desperate wretch as I knew he could be, might hoot him in the High

Street, My patroness, too, might hear of him, and not approve. On the

whole, I resolved to leave the Avenger behind.

It was the afternoon coach by which I had taken my place, and, as winter

had now come round, I should not arrive at my destination until two or

three hours after dark. Our time of starting from the Cross Keys was

two o'clock. I arrived on the ground with a quarter of an hour to spare,

attended by the Avenger,--if I may connect that expression with one who

never attended on me if he could possibly help it.

At that time it was customary to carry Convicts down to the dock-yards

by stage-coach. As I had often heard of them in the capacity of outside

passengers, and had more than once seen them on the high road dangling

their ironed legs over the coach roof, I had no cause to be surprised

when Herbert, meeting me in the yard, came up and told me there were two

convicts going down with me. But I had a reason that was an old reason

now for constitutionally faltering whenever I heard the word "convict."