Goodmans Hotel

'I'm not sure...'

'Well see how you're fixed. We're up on the second floor, or if you're passing the lounge about six or seven we'll likely be in there. A lad like you ought to enjoy a bit of life on a Saturday night.'

Having devoured their full English breakfasts, the Geordies and their friends all retired to the three second floor rooms. On their way up they encountered the two men who had requested room service making their way down. The staircase to the first floor is much wider than those above, and the Geordies, pulling the continentals into line and moving to the sides of the steps made a narrow corridor for the two men to pass through, trying to play the same trick they had played on me when they forced me to squeeze through them as they crowded the doorways to their rooms. 'Come through now, don't let us hold you up,' the redhead called.

'No, you're the majority, you come up first, please.' Wisely the two men from room four resisted the invitation and backed away from the ten-man gauntlet waiting on the stairs.

I shouted from the hall, 'Either go up or come down, you'll cause an accident, fooling around like that on the stairs.' They yielded and resumed their way up.

I apologised to the two men for the obstruction, showed them to a freshly laid table in the dining room, and said I hoped they weren't offended by my note about not providing room service. 'We would have quite liked to have taken breakfast in bed, but we quite understand,' was the slightly cool reply.

In the afternoon at about four o'clock one of the Geordies, a brown haired man I had not heard speak before, reappeared in the hall, unshaven, dark shadows under his eyes, having quickly pulled on a T-shirt and trousers. 'We've run out of tea things. Could you let us have a few extras?'

All the rooms have their own tea and coffee making equipment. I gave him a tray with extra supplies, including sachets of coffee and China and Indian tea bags, four extra cups and some biscuits. 'Your visitors, they look to me like orientals, not continentals.'

'Don't be silly, man. We're all oriented the same way, that's why we're staying in a gay hotel.'

'What about cleaning your rooms?'

'Don't worry about that; where we come from we only make the beds at Christmas and Bank Holidays. You don't really need to when you sleep in your clothes.'

'You might like to mention to the others that if you want dinner tomorrow it's served from two o'clock. You'll probably eat on the train or when you reach home, but if you do want the meal you need to tell me tonight.'