From Ashes

“And you’re sure about that?”

“Yeah. She made herself pretty clear. What makes it harder is that even though she’s his girlfriend, and she doesn’t want me, I can’t stop being near her. I hate just being her friend, but I would rather be her friend than not have her at all. I thought this summer would be good for me, to get her out of my head; instead I just feel like I’m dying the longer I’m away from her.”

Dad was quiet again for a moment. “Well, I haven’t ever experienced this, uh—pull you’re talking about. But I don’t think you’re crazy. The only advice I have for you is don’t give up. If you’re sure you want her, then you gotta fight for her.”

“But she’s with Tyler. If it was anyone else I wouldn’t have a problem with it. But Ty?”

“That does make your situation a little difficult. Have you talked to Tyler about her?”

“Oh yeah, at first he was pissed that I wouldn’t stop looking at her, then one night he finally said he’d step back and let us be together. That next morning was when she yelled at me, told me she didn’t want to see me. And it’s hard, because even though I’m positive she’s not in love with Tyler, and honestly I don’t think they’re even actually together, she can’t leave him. Same way he can’t leave her.”

“I’m just going to assume you’re about to explain that. ’Cause that little statement is confusing as hell.”

“Well, since you’ll probably never meet her, I guess it’s safe to tell you about her childhood. Her dad died when she was real young, on her birthday actually. It really screwed her mom up; she turned into an alcoholic and married some guy. From the day he died, Cassidy had to raise herself; her mom stopped feeding her, washing her clothes, even talking to her. And she was only six. Then after her stepdad moved in, they started beating her. Up until the day Tyler packed her shit up and moved her to Texas.”

“You got some beatings yourself, son.”

“No, Dad, not like getting spanked by Mom when I was little. They didn’t just take off their belts and hit her with that or a wooden spoon when she was in trouble. They could’ve killed her. Tyler told me about some of the times, and I saw pictures from after a few of the tamer times and it’s enough to make you sick. Uncle Jim would have to stitch her up sometimes, others she’d be so messed up she wouldn’t be able to walk. Her bruises when she moved in were like nothing I’ve ever seen. Her entire back and sides were black, blue, green, and yellow. They’re obviously all gone now though, but Ty said she’s really careful about what she wears around people because of the scars she has from some of the bad beatings.”

“How people can do that to their own kid is beyond me. People like that need to be arrested, or shot. I’m sure we can find some ditches.” He smiled under his massive mustache.

“I swear I wanted to drive there and have a conversation with them and my shotgun. It about killed me; she’s the sweetest person you’ve ever met. And she wouldn’t let Tyler turn them in. Her mom’s a heartless bitch, and yet Cassidy still would never do anything against her.”

Dad just shook his head and relaxed against the tree. “Don’t give up on her, Gage. You don’t feel this way for no reason. What do you say we finish this post and call it a day? You need to explain to your mama what’s been going on. She might have better advice than your old man. And you better apologize to her. She’s been making herself sick with worry.”

I nodded. “Sorry for putting y’all through this. I honestly didn’t realize I was letting it show so much.”

“You’re forgiven. Come on, I’m hungry and your mama and sisters are makin’ chili and corn bread.”

I missed Cassidy’s cooking. I missed trying to help her cook, even though I messed everything up more times than not. I missed her laugh and smile, and the way she felt in my arms every morning. I just missed her. God, I felt like such a f**kin’ girl.

We fixed the broken parts of the fence and were on our way back to the house within ten minutes. We rode slowly back, and I told Dad more about Cassidy and our lives together with Tyler. Not even halfway back to the house, my sister Amanda texted me to say Ty, his parents, and a girl were at the main house and for us to come back. I didn’t need to ask who the girl was; there wasn’t anyone else they’d bring.

“Gage, what’s wrong?”

I realized I’d stopped my horse Bear and was just staring in the direction of the house. Looking up at him, I could only say one word. “Cassidy.” If Bear sprinted, we’d be back in about fifteen minutes, and even that seemed too long. “Hya!”

“Gage!”

I couldn’t look back at my dad. I heard his horse in a dead sprint behind us, and I knew he’d be pissed at me for taking off like that, but she was here. When we reached the house, I saw Tyler’s Jeep out front and stood there for almost an entire minute trying to decide between taking care of Bear and going to her.

“She’ll still be in there in five minutes. After what you just put Bear through, you may want to attend to him first.”

I grunted in acknowledgment and jumped off my horse to walk him toward the stables. After he had everything off him, we sprayed him and my dad’s horse down with a hose and let them out into the field. Dad put his hand on my shoulder to stop me, and I tried not to let him see how frustrated I was that he was continuing to keep me from Cassidy.