Free Falling
Page 11“We can’t all ride around in our cheating boyfriend’s sports car!” He frowned and looked away from me, obviously annoyed.
I chewed on my lip and felt a wave of guilt wash over me. I was being so horrible to him, and all he was doing was being nice to me. This wasn’t me, I wasn’t like this usually, I was Maisie Preston, sweet and kind to everyone, but Luke had turned me into this bitter, nasty person. This was another thing that was his fault.
“Sorry, Zach. I was out of order saying that. I’d like a ride if you’re still offering it, but I understand if you want to tell me to jog on,” I said, looking at him apologetically.
He chuckled quietly. “I’ve never said the words ‘jog on’ in my life, I’d usually go for something stronger,” he said, a grin stretching across his face. I smiled apologetically and he rolled his eyes, “Come on then, little miss DUI, let’s get you home, huh?” He patted the seat behind him for me to get on.
I winced and looked longingly back up the road, contemplating my options again.
“Get on, Maisie!” he ordered, grabbing the front of my playsuit and pulling me towards him. I squealed as my clothes moved. Where he pulled me, the top came away from my body, so I quickly clutched it to my chest again so he didn’t get an eyeful. He laughed and let go. “Almost got a flash then. Maybe next time.” He winked at me and I gasped. Maybe I really should walk home. “Get on the bike before I run out of gas from sitting here idle for so freaking long. I do have places to get to you know, I don’t just hang out on the streets waiting for random drunken girls to run me down!” I winced thinking about almost killing him and stepped closer, gripping his shoulders for support as I climbed, in an exceptionally unladylike fashion, onto the seat behind him. He laughed and stood up with his legs either side of the bike, and pulled off his hoodie, passing it to me. “It’ll be cold when we get going and you’re only in that slutty little outfit,” he said, nodding down at the flimsy clothes I was wearing.
“I’m not a slut.” I frowned in protest but pulled on the offered sweater at the same time.
He smirked at me and shrugged. “Tell that to your legs that are exposed almost to the pleasure zone which, coincidently, is pressed against a stranger’s ass,” he commented, laughing as I slapped his back.
“Are you gonna drive me home or stand there making assumptions about me all night?” I asked, trying to sound stern but failing miserably, he was actually pretty funny.
I nodded and gripped his T-shirt. I could feel his toned muscles under my hands; I knew he would be in good shape because of the whole freerunning and jumping over a moving car thing. “Where’s my helmet anyway?” I asked, looking around for it hanging somewhere.
“Don’t have one,” he answered as he pulled out. I jerked back in the seat from the take-off and screamed, throwing my arms around his waist and pressing my face into his back. My heart was beating out of my chest from the fear of it. This is such a stupid idea; I’m so going to die. Hopefully it’ll be quick and painless!
When we didn’t immediately die, I pulled my face away from his back and looked over his shoulder. Then, before I knew what was happening, it started to feel nice. The wind was blowing across my face again like when we were running from Luke’s car. It was almost like flying. My heart slowed down as my stomach got a little fluttery as the adrenalin started to flow through my veins.
I grinned and pressed my mouth and nose into his shoulder to make it easier to breathe, but I kept my eyes firmly forward as I wrapped my arms tighter around his waist. This was my first time on a motorbike, and I had to admit, I loved it. The fluid way that he mastered the bike and leant into the corners, it was almost sexual, and for some reason I felt a little weird to be doing this with him. This innocent ride home was actually sexy as hell.
Way too soon, he pulled into my street, slowing down and eventually came to a stop outside of my house. I took a couple of deep breaths as I pushed myself off of the bike. My legs were a little wobbly from the vibrations of the journey, but even that was a gratifying feeling. I smiled and pulled off his hoodie, handing it back to him, trying not to grin like an idiot because the feeling riding on the bike caused in me. I didn’t want him to know how much I enjoyed it because then he’d be smirking at me again.
“Thanks for the ride. Sorry again for almost killing you earlier,” I said, wincing sheepishly.
He laughed and shook his head dismissively. “What’s a little car accident between friends?” he joked. “You got keys, right?” He nodded towards the house in prompt.
I nodded, knowing there was a spare key hidden under a rock around the back of the house. “Yeah, thanks.” I looked at him, unsure what else to say to this stranger than had just shown me an act of kindness and saved me from a whole heap of trouble.
As soon as I was on my own I started to think about Luke again. Zach had taken my mind off of it for a little while, but as soon as he rode off all I could think about was the betrayal that I felt in the pit of my stomach and how my heart felt like it was physically aching. The thing that got to me the most was the fact that I was actually worried about Luke. I’d left him at the party, unable to stand, throwing up and alone. I hated myself for still caring, but I did.
I gulped and forced myself to walk inside the house before I broke down on the front lawn. Once in the solitude of my bedroom I closed my door silently behind me. I didn’t want my parents to know I was home; I just didn’t want to see anyone right now. I slumped down onto my bed, ignoring how my bare feet put dirt smudges over the sheets. I pulled the covers up over my head to muffle the sound, and then I sobbed my heart out for the guy who I thought would love me forever. I sobbed for my lost future with him, I sobbed for the time that I’d already wasted with him, I sobbed for the special things that I gave him of myself, things I could never give anyone else: my first kiss, my virginity. I just sobbed until the tears dried up and my chest hurt from the effort.
I wanted sleep to come and take me so I could stop thinking about it, but that didn’t happen. Instead, I laid there awake all night, replaying everything good that happened between us, our plans, our memories. I just laid there wondering when the exact moment was that I ceased to be enough for him.
By the time morning came I felt a little dead inside. I didn’t know what to think or feel. I’d had to turn my cell phone off during the night because the constant ringing and buzzing had driven me crazy. I reached over and grabbed it, turning it on again. The texts started coming through immediately. Twenty-six in total, all from Luke. I deleted them all without reading them, I didn’t want to know what he said, I didn’t want to hear his apologies, they weren’t enough.
I unclasped my hand, stretching out my stiff fingers from where they had been in the same position all night - wrapped tightly around my locket that Luke had bought me. I couldn’t let go of it. During the night I’d just laid there reading the inscription on the back over and over again. ‘True love lasts for always. Yours forever, Luke’. Yours forever. The words brought a sad smile to my face every time I read them. Obviously his idea of forever and my idea of it were miles apart.
At just after ten in the morning there was a loud knocking on the front door. I already knew it would be him. I looked around my room for some sort of escape or somewhere to hide. I didn’t want to see him, not yet, I couldn’t face it. Voices drifted up the stairs, belonging to my dad and Luke. My dad was telling him that I wasn’t here, that I stayed at Charlotte’s, so obviously I was quiet enough that they didn’t hear me come in last night.
I pushed myself out of the bed and crept to the door, opening it quietly and peeking down the stairs, but staying back so I wouldn’t be seen.
“Clay, she’s here! Please just let me go check her room,” Luke begged desperately.
“Please can I just go check her room? I need to speak to her,” Luke begged. His voice sounded so weak and sad that it made my knees tremble. He was upset too, but I refused to feel guilty about it, this wasn’t my fault.
My dad sighed in frustration. “Fine. Go see for yourself.”
I quickly pulled open my door and stepped out; I didn’t want Luke in my room. “I don’t want to talk to him,” I said to my dad’s shocked face. Immediately he put his arm across the bottom of the stairs, stopping Luke from getting to me, even though he didn’t know why he was doing it or what was going on. I really had the best dad in the world.
“Maisie, please! I’m sorry, please I’m so sorry, baby,” Luke cried, his eyes full of anguish and pain.
I sniffed and shook my head, walking down the stairs to see him better. My dad’s arm was now across Luke’s chest as Luke shoved and thrashed trying to get to me. “It’s too late,” I whispered, stopping when I was about three steps from the bottom.
His whole face fell. “No! It’s not too late, don’t say that. I didn’t know what I was doing; someone put something in my drink last night. You know I would never cheat on you! You know me!” He looked at me desperately, his whole posture just looked crushed, and I wanted to wrap my arms around his neck and comfort him, but I just couldn’t move my feet from the step I was on. I needed to stay strong; the relationship obviously wasn’t what I thought it was if it meant that little to him that he would forget me for a quickie at a party. Drunk or stoned, you just didn’t do that to someone who you love.