Finding the Lost

Andra braced her hands on his chest and rocked her hips. The branches of his lifemark swayed in response to her touch, arching toward her splayed fingers.

Paul felt a zing of sensation every time she ground herself against him just the right way. Whether it was hers or his, he couldn’t tell. It didn’t matter anymore. All the sensations they felt, they shared, and he could no longer separate them. She squeezed him tight and now he was the one on the edge, gritting his teeth to hold back his climax just a little longer.

It didn’t work. She sped her pace and it sent her flying into her orgasm headfirst. Paul was right there with her. His body tensed and he let out a rough shout of completion as the first wave of release crashed against him. Andra’s voice rose along with his, echoing off the barrier she’d created around the two of them.

Paul pulled her close and kissed her open mouth as he came inside her. His vision faded, but he didn’t care. He had the feel of her against his body and in his mind, the sound of her voice singing in his ears, the taste of her on his tongue, and the scent of her in his lungs. And still, it wasn’t enough to sate him. He’d never get enough of her.

Their bodies quieted until only small quivers of their climax remained. She was draped limply over his chest, breathing hard. Paul gathered her limbs and rolled her over, but couldn’t bring himself to leave her body. Not yet.

He arranged her arms until she looked comfortable. By the time he was finished, she was pulling away from him, seeping out of his mind so that the space felt empty and darker somehow.

“You’re leaving me?”

“I thought you’d want your space now that we’re done,” she said.

She still didn’t get it. “This is the way it’s supposed to be between us. Not just during sex, either.”

“I don’t think I can handle having you in my head all the time. It’s a little crowded up there.”

The comment hurt his feelings, but he tried not to let it show. “It didn’t feel crowded to me.”

“You’re used to all of this.” She pushed against his chest and he took the not-so-subtle hint that she wanted him to move away.

Paul didn’t budge. He liked being inside her too much. In fact, he could probably go another couple of rounds before he wore himself out enough to stop. Just looking at her, knowing that flush over her skin was his doing, made him hard. “You’d get used to it, too, if you’d let yourself.”

“I’m giving you almost a week. What more do you want?”

“A lifetime,” he shot back at her. “Several, actually.”

She frowned as if she hadn’t understood what he said, but then he saw her eyes widen in shock as she realized he was speaking literally. She prodded at his mind, seeking the truth; then she pulled out completely and a thick wall slammed down between them.

Shit. He’d lost her. Scared her off.

“You can’t mean that.”

“I do. You’re mine, and I’m keeping you.” To emphasize his point, he ground his hips against hers, making her feel every inch of him still hot and hard within her.

Her eyes fluttered shut and she bit her lip to hold back a soft sound of pleasure. He heard it anyway.

“Stop. Please. This is too much.”

It wasn’t nearly enough. The need to possess her was raging inside of him. He had to find a way to keep her forever. Three days were never going to be enough. Hell, forever might not be, either.

Make her stay.

It was an order, given to him by their chosen leader. Defying that was the same thing as betraying his people. He had to make her stay.

That brilliant, glowing pool of power inside him swelled in response. He’d never been able to access it before Andra, but now that he was connected to her, he could use their link to draw upon that power and channel it through her for short periods of time. He could use it to do his will. To make Andra do the same.

“What are you doing?” she asked in a weak, frightened voice.

Paul didn’t answer. Instead, he called to his power and felt the seething waves of it rise to do his bidding. He channeled a thick column of it toward their link.

“Paul,” she whispered. “You can’t. I can’t take that much.”

“You can. You will.” That didn’t sound like him. There was a dark, discordant note in his words, as if there were another voice speaking along with him, harsh and out of harmony.

The closer the column of glowing energy got to their link, the more it looked as though he were trying to channel a waterfall through a drinking straw. Maybe she was right. Maybe it was too much.

But it felt so good. He was close to something important—some kind of breakthrough that would change his life.

“Please.” Andra’s voice sounded faint and far away.

“Just relax,” he said in that jumbled voice. “It will be easier on you.”

The first drops of energy hit their link. Power sling-shot from him, through her, back into him. The feeling was amazing. Sparks dribbled from his fingertips and slid over Andra’s skin, leaving angry red streaks behind.

He’d heal her later, when it was over and she belonged to him forever.

“You’re hurting me.”

He paused. Something here wasn’t right. He just couldn’t figure out what it was.

“Paul!” His name was a shout of pain.

He was hurting Andra. Killing her with his need for her to stay by his side. He loved her and he was killing her.

He couldn’t do it. He had to stop.

That massive column of power plummeted back into the glowing ocean inside him. Searing agony streaked out through his limbs, but he gritted his teeth and took it. His body locked up against the pain.

“You need to breathe, damn it,” he heard Andra say. She was so far away.

His lungs were crushed under a wave of pressure. There was no room to breathe.

Then her mouth was on his, kissing him, filling him up with air. He wished he could see her. She was so beautiful. He wanted to see her again before he died.

“You’re not going to die unless I’m the one doing the killing.” Another breath filled him.

Andra pulled at his power, though he had no idea what she was doing with it. Whatever it was, it felt good. Cool. Clean. Just like her.

Mine.

That thought ricocheted around in his head so loudly he was sure she’d heard it. He was just as sure she wasn’t going to like it.

Chapter 23

Andra pulled back in shock at the possessiveness inside him. He wasn’t just playing at the caveman attitude. He really meant it. As in forever, which for him was a really long time.

She had no idea why he would want to be stuck with one person for so long, much less someone who failed as often as she did. He had to have suffered some kind of brain damage at some point. That was the only explanation she could think of.

He’d seen inside her. He knew how horribly she’d failed her family when it meant the most that she succeed. He’d seen the repercussions of her failure in every one of Nika’s terrified delusions.

Nika was dying because Andra had failed, and yet Paul still wanted her. Didn’t he know she would only end up getting him killed, too?

He was sleeping now. She could feel the restful waves drifting out of him. They calmed her frantic need to run away enough to allow her to stay by his side.

Andra smoothed his messy hair away from his face. He was such a sexy man, so handsome in a rough sort of way, with just enough bad boy in him to make her panties perpetually wet. He was a walking fantasy. His thick, demanding erection was just an added bonus.

He’d come, but was still hard. For her. She’d seen that clearly enough to know the truth. He wasn’t closing his eyes and thinking of someone else when he took her. He wanted only her.

Part of her glowed with the knowledge, but the rest of her was wondering how he could feel that way when he knew just how flawed she really was.

Maybe it didn’t matter what a coward she could be so long as he liked her body. Yeah, that was probably it. Made perfect sense.

And hurt like hell.

Andra scrubbed her face with her hands. She’d been so confused since she’d met him. Everything had been turned upside down and she was always one step behind, frantically trying to catch up and figure out what was going on.

If it helped Nika, it would all be worth it. She’d go on her way, and maybe when she came back to visit her sister, she could see Paul, too.

That would be nice. She didn’t want to belong to him or tie him down, but she didn’t want to never see him again, either. They could date when things weren’t so crazy and maybe get to know each other like normal people. Or, at least as normal as people like them could ever be.

She would enjoy getting used to having a big, sexy, sword-wielding warrior with a nonstop erection around. What girl wouldn’t?

It could work. They might even end up close enough that she’d be willing to give that forever thing a shot—once she was sure he knew she wasn’t the dependable sort. As long as he got rid of his delusions about her, she’d be willing to try. Chances were it wouldn’t work, but they sure would have fun giving it a try.

Madoc pressed his cheek to the bare wall, wishing he could slide through the faded paint. He knew the walls of the suites at Dabyr were insulated against noise, and there was no way he could hear Nika’s heart beating. But he could feel it. Just on the other side of the wall. Faint, but steady. She was still alive.

Pain racked his body, but even so, some of the brittleness in his bones bled away as he pressed himself as close as he could get to her.

The suite next to Paul’s—the one Madoc was in—was empty. No one would be coming by. Nicholas’s electronic eyes couldn’t see him in here. It was just him and the steady beat of Nika’s heart. Alone together.

He didn’t know why he was here. He had no business being here. He needed to be out there, fighting. Fucking. Blowing off some pressure so he could keep going for just a little longer. Just long enough to know she was going to be okay.

It shouldn’t have mattered to him, but apparently enough of his soul was left that it did. He wasn’t sure anymore how much of a good thing that was, but he accepted it—like he accepted the pain pounding through him with every breath.

As soon as she woke up, he promised himself he’d leave. He’d go and never come back. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could trust himself to stay away from her.

And if she bonded to one of the men here, he was pretty sure he’d go lethal. It was best to leave before that happened. But not until she was better. Not until she was safe.

Zach wheeled Torr outside where he could watch the sunset. They both needed some fresh air and Zach really needed a sanity check. All of his friends were slipping away. Kevin and Thomas were dead, both in the past few weeks. Drake had Helen now. They were still spending every second together, and as much as he was happy for his buddy, he was so jealous it made his stomach burn. He could hardly stand to look at Drake anymore without wishing for that same kind of happiness so hard he ached down to his bones.

Lexi was gone. He couldn’t feel her today, though every once in a while—every few days—his bloodmark would suddenly start doing its job again and he’d get a hint as to her direction. It never lasted long enough for him to track her, and every time he got that little ping, it was from a different location.