Finding Faith

“Faith, I know I haven’t really allowed you to do much, but if I kept you away from things, it was because I worried for your safety. It’s a cruel world out there and believe it or not, there are people out there who would love nothing more than to taint such a precious girl like you. I feel good about Stephen. He’s a nice boy and he comes from a nice God-fearing family.”

I couldn’t think of anything to say back. “I know, Daddy,” I squeaked.

Headlights filled our front window and the butterflies in my stomach fought to escape. Within seconds, the doorbell rang and my parents met Stephen at the door and asked him to come in.

I sat quietly in the corner chair as my father talked Stephen to death. He talked until we barely had time to make it to the movie. It almost felt like he did it on purpose, like giving Stephen and me less time together would prevent us from doing anything sinful.

As I looked over at Stephen in the car on the way to the movie, I couldn’t see him even thinking sinful thoughts, much less doing anything unbecoming. Finn, on the other hand, was a walking sin. The way he strutted into a room like he owned it with his sly grin and amazing dimples. He knew he was nice to look at. He was prideful and confident and it was like staring at the sun. I had to admit, I liked basking in his heat.

The movie Stephen took me to was G-rated. It was insulting. I was seventeen years old. I had no business going on a date to see a G-rated movie. It was definitely something Finn would never hear about. I could practically hear his laughter.

I took the box of popcorn from Stephen and he ushered me into the theater. The next two hours of my life I spent staring at the screen, but not really watching. Occasionally, Stephen would ask me a question and I’d nod. I was probably the most boring date ever, but then again, he was the most boring date ever so I guess we fit.

I found myself upset over the fact that I wasn’t enjoying any of it. One night of freedom and there I was sitting at a kids’ movie with some guy who barely talked to me, much less looked at me. There were parents and crying babies everywhere, so if I wanted to watch the movie, I wouldn’t have been able to hear it anyway. It was a total waste of a night. I could’ve gotten more enjoyment out of reading.

I’d never been happier to see my house when we pulled up. Stephen wasted no time getting me home. He was the perfect guy for my dad. I should’ve been happy about that. The thought of actually having some form of life outside of church and school should’ve made my night, but all I could think about was Finn and how much fun we had, even at church. I could imagine how much fun he’d be on a date.

Stephen walked me to the front door at exactly nine o’clock. The automatic porch light came on and shined directly in my eyes.

“I had a good time,” he said.

I was glad he did, but I couldn’t say the same.

“Me too,” I lied again.

Lying was becoming easier and easier. That was either a really bad thing or a really good thing.

“Could we do it again?” he asked.

I’d hoped he wouldn’t ask, but I couldn’t hurt his feelings. I didn’t want to be mean and say no. Plus, what would my dad say? Instead, I smiled up at him sweetly and agreed.

“Sure.”

His smile was brighter than my porch light as he leaned in. The thought of kissing him and getting my mouth stuck to his braces scared me. Thankfully, he softly pressed his lips to my cheek and pulled away.

“Goodnight, Faith.”

“Goodnight, Stephen.”

That night I went to bed with thoughts of Finn. His unrushed movements, as if the world moved on his time. His soft blue eyes that never missed anything and his cocky smile. These were the last things I saw before sleep took me away.

Six

Finn

There’s a first time for everything. And I could say without blinking that it was the first time a girl had ever been stolen from me. Although, technically, she was never mine. That still didn’t stop me from staring a hole in the back of Stephen’s auburn head during church on Sunday and wishing he’d go back to wherever he came from.

I hadn’t had a chance to be alone with Faith to find out how the date went, but with a guy like the freckled wonder, I’m sure it didn’t go too far. Maybe a goodnight kiss?

Every now and again, Faith would turn her head to the side and I’d catch her looking at me from the front row. I liked it when she looked at me. It let me know she was thinking about me, which worked since I was thinking about her.

She was wearing blue. I’d only ever seen her in khaki and pink. I really liked her in blue. The way her brown waves looked against the soft color, the way the blue looked against her perfect skin—perfect skin that I would’ve gotten to know well if I’d been in Stephen’s shoes.