Fighting to Survive

Tentatively, Juan reached out and touched her arm. She glanced at him. Her focus appeared to return to the here and now. She stepped closer and he slung an arm over her shoulders. Her body was very tense. He kissed her cheek, trying to soothe her.

It didn't seem to work.

She continued to stare ahead.

At their floor, Jenni briskly walked out of the elevator and out of his reach. With a sigh, Juan followed, his tired, battered fingers searching for their key in his pocket. She stood impatiently at the door as he unlocked it. Unlike other times, when she was flirting and anxious to get him alone, she avoided looking at him and was silent. He had a feeling her lack of patience had nothing to do with sex, but something unpleasant.

When they entered the small suite, Juan quickly looked around for the kid. A closed door with music loudly thumping behind it, let Juan know where Jason was hanging out. The dog was probably in there, too. The kid and the dog were pretty much inseparable.

“I'm going to bed,” Jenni stated.

“You don't want to talk about whatever it is that is making you like this?” He already knew the answer, but he had to ask.

“No.”

“Why not?” He couldn't help himself. He wanted to know what was wrong.

“It's not important.”

“If it wasn't important you shouldn't be flipping out.”

“I'm just tired.”

“You're lying.”

“Fuck you!”

“Whoa! Where did that come from?”

“I told you it's not important!” Jenni's dark eyes were full of indignation.

“Then why are you acting loca, Loca? Juan felt his temper rising.

He loved her madly, but she was getting on his last nerve.

“Maybe because I am! You knew that when we go together!”

Hands on her hips, her jaw set in a defiant line, she seemed to dare him to push the topic further.

He hated himself, but he couldn't help it. “Something happened out there. I have a right to know what is going on in that loca head of yours. I love you.”

She stared at him for a few beatings of his worried heart, then simply walked out the door.

“Hey! Hey! Hey!”

He rushed after her, but the door slammed firmly behind her.

Flinging the door open, he looked out to see her getting back onto the elevator. His anger told him to follow her, confront her and make her tell him what was going on, but his love for her told him to not be a selfish bastard. Struggling to rein in his emotions, he stepped back into the suite they shared.

Taking off his cowboy hat, he ran his hand over his long curls.

Loca was nuts, but she wasn't stupid. She wouldn't rush off and do anything stupid; well, stupid as in going zombie hunting alone or anything like that.

Arching an eyebrow, he suddenly knew exactly where she was going. Snatching up the phone on the table beside the door, he dialed Katie's room. It took a few rings before she answered.

“Hello?”

“Katie, Loca just blew out of here.”

“What do you mean?”

“She was acting all weird-”

“I noticed.”

“-and was not telling me what was up-”

“She tends to do that.”

“-and I basically ordered her to tell me-”

“A very stupid move on your part.”

“-and out the door she went. I think she's heading your way.

You're not naked and doing anything sweaty with Travis right now, are you? Cause Loca will need you to calm her ass down.”

“I'm not naked or doing anything sweaty with Travis. He's actually about to head out and meet with Eric to work on some plans for Main Street.” Katie sounded worried and bemused all at the same time.

“Okay, so you will take care of my girl?”

“Absolutely,” Katie answered.

Juan sighed. “Take care of her, Katie. Please.”

“I will.”

Hanging up, Juan closed his eyes to rub his eyelids. He was weary.

His eyes felt like salt had been poured into them. Jenni not being with him was disconcerting. He felt lost without her. Surprised to feel tears in his eyes, he slid onto a stool tucked beside a small bar next to the kitchenette.

The music in Jason's room was still pounding away and it did nothing to calm his nerves. Letting out another weary sigh, he swept a tear away with his rough fingers.

Loca would be okay. He knew it. She was too tough to let anything drag her down. He just had to wait for her to come back to their little home.

It would be okay.

He hoped.

***

Katie hung up the phone and stared at it, deep in thought.

“What's wrong?” Travis emerged from the bathroom, his face and hair a little damp. He was feeling tired, but still had a few more hours of work. A splash of cold water on his face had him looking more alert.

“Jenni is on her way. Juan says she walked out on an argument.”

Katie folded her arms over her breasts. “I noticed she was abnormally quiet tonight, but I thought she was just tired.”

Travis walked over and kissed her cheek. “If anyone can calm her down, it's you. It'll be fine.”

“If she talks to me,” Katie grumbled. “She's been evasive on a lot of stuff lately.”

“She's haunted. Maybe a little more than a lot of us.” Travis rubbed Katie's shoulders. “I better go before she lands on our doorstep.”

Katie's fingers brushed over his hand and she gave him a worried smile. She was sincerely worried about Jenni. She remembered the near catatonic woman in her truck. No one else in the Fort had ever seen Jenni that way, but Katie knew how fragile Jenni's condition had been on that first day.

Travis pressed a kiss to her lips, then moved toward the door. “See you at breakfast.”

“I'll miss you,” Katie said with a slight smile.

There was a sharp rap on the door.

“I think she's here. Take care of her, Katie.” Travis smiled ruefully, then opened the door.

Jenni stood there, hands on her hips, her head down. Her face was obscured by her hair.

“Hey, Jenni,” Travis said, and brushed past her quickly.

Katie could tell he did not want to upset Jenni anymore than she already was. Another reason why she adored him so. He always was considerate of others.

Jenni stepped into the room and slammed the door behind her.

“Jenni?”

Her friend looked up, her face streaked with tears. With a small cry of despair, Jenni launched herself into Katie's arms and clung to her.

“Oh, Jenni! What is it? What's wrong?”

“He can't see me like this! He can't! He doesn't know how I used to be!”

Katie held her tightly and could feel her friend trembling violently.

“Jenni, what is it? What is it?” Jenni's tears were soaking her neck and shoulder. Katie stroked Jenni's dark hair soothingly with one hand.

There was no answer for a minute or two as Jenni wept. Then, at last, she raised her head and wiped at her soaked cheeks with irritated hands. Jenni struggled to get her breath, then regained some of her composure. “I think Lloyd is haunting me.”

Katie blinked and ran Jenni's words through her mind one more time. “Huh?”

“I think Lloyd is haunting me and trying to kill me.” Jenni's dark lashes glittered with tears and she fastened her red eyes on Katie defiantly. “And I'm not joking!”

Katie could see the anger, desperation, and fear in Jenni's face. She was not about to argue with her. She had suffered her own struggles with the past and couldn't judge her. “Why do you think that? What happened?”

In a voice that trembled with emotion, Jenni explained the events of the day. Katie listened in silence, taking in the words, watching Jenni's expression. It was obvious that the seal Jenni so painstakingly kept clamped over her past had been ripped off. She was trembling and afraid. Instead of looking like her usual rough and tough self, she appeared emotionally shattered. She resembled the woman standing on the front porch of her home in her pink bathrobe watching tiny dead fingers pressed under the door.

“And Juan cannot see me like this! He can't! He loves the new Jenni. Not the old one. I hate being the old Jenni! I hate it! I don't like feeling this way! I don't like being weak! I thought I was past this!” Jenni flung herself onto Katie's bed in a dramatic finish.

Katie slid onto the bed and gently rubbed Jenni's back. “It's okay, Jenni. It's okay to have a bad day. We all have them. It doesn't mean you're the old Jenni. It just means that something happened today that really upset you. I told you about the dreams I used to have about Lydia. I still struggle with that guilt. I struggle with the knowledge that I did not kill the thing she became. Hell, I struggle with the guilt that I did not put your children and Lloyd out of their misery.”

Jenni gave her a fierce look over her shoulder. “I don't give a shit if Lloyd wanders out there forever. I hope he rots slowly. I hope his soul is still in his body! I hope he's aware of what he is! Fuck him!” ns class="adsbygoogle" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">