Falling Under (Falling 3)
Page 59“When can we see him?” Kylie wants to know.
“He’s unconscious at the moment. It’s not a coma, though, just natural post-op sleep. You can probably see him in a few hours. Sometime later today, I’d say. Ya’ll have been here for a long time, so why don’t you head home and catch some sleep?”
Kylie shook her head. “No…no. I need to see him. Can’t I just—just see him?”
The surgeon shook his head. “I’m sorry, but I really feel it’s in his best interests to remain undisturbed for the time being.” His expression softens. “You won’t do him any good if you’re in a state of exhaustion. You need to rest. I can tell you from experience, the sleep you get in a waiting room in a hospital is no kind of rest at all. Go home. Sleep. Come back this evening, and you’ll be able to see him, hopefully speak to him.”
I wrap my arm around Kylie’s shoulders. “Come on, Ky. He’s right. We’re all exhausted. We know he’s okay now. He’ll be okay. Let’s get you home? Just for a few hours.”
Kylie nods, and then slips out of my hold, reaches for Kate. “He’s all right, Kate. He’ll be fine.” Kylie and Kate embrace, and I can see Kate visibly shuddering and trying to hold it together.
“He really loves you, you know. I wasn’t sure he’d ever find that.” Kate pulls away, holds Kylie by the shoulders. “I’m so glad he did. You’ve really brought him to life, Kylie, and I can’t ever thank you enough for that.”
“He’s amazing,” Kylie says.
“Yeah, he is. No thanks to me.” Kate squeezes her eyes shut and turns away.
“Hey, hey.” Kylie shakes Kate’s arm. “No. You’ve always been there for him. You gave him…so much. Everything. And he knows it. He’s told me as much.”
“He—he did?”
Kate smiles. “Thanks, Kylie.” She shakes her head, wipes her eyes. “Sorry. Sorry. I’m just so emotional. Go home, get some rest. We’ll all come back later and see him.” She gives Kylie one last hug, and then she’s gone.
As Kate shuffles down the hallway toward the elevators, Jason and Becca return from the cafeteria, Styrofoam cups of coffee in hand, Ben trailing behind them, looking subdued and miserable. Becca halts in the doorway, staring after Kate.
“Who—who was that?” Becca asks. It wasn’t quite a stutter, more of a stumble, but it spoke volumes about how unnerved Becca is. She turns to Kylie. “Who was that?”
“That?” Kylie is visibly confused. “That was Oz’s mom. Why?”
Becca doesn’t answer right away. “Nothing. She just…she looked familiar. Must have been my imagination.” She shakes her head, dismissing the thought. “I just thought for a second—oh, never mind. How is Oz?”
“Oz is out of surgery. He’s asleep now, but they said he should be fine.” Kylie hiccups, and her effort to sound strong crumbles. “He broke his leg and re-broke his arm. And his head—he…they say he shouldn’t have any—any lasting damage. But they won’t know till he wakes up.”
Becca gathers Kylie to her. “He’ll be okay, honey. You’ll see.”
Kylie nods, and pulls away. “Yeah, I know. He’s tough.”
We all head home, and Kylie is asleep on her feet by the time we get inside. I follow her upstairs, tuck her in to her bed the way I used to, when she was a little girl.
“Daddy?” Her voice is tiny, sleep-slow.
“I’m so mad at Ben. I’m so mad it scares me.” She sniffles. “Don’t let him—if he comes here looking for me, don’t let him in. I can’t see him. Not yet. Maybe not ever.”
I sigh. “Oh, honey. It was an accident. A stupid accident that should never have happened. It wasn’t his fault, honey. He didn’t mean for it to happen.”
“He was picking a fight!” Kylie is furious, but too tired to really express it. “Oz had a broken arm, and he was trying to be rational about it. But Ben was just…just spoiling for a fight. I told him I was with Oz. I told him, Daddy. Months ago. But he couldn’t accept it.”
“He’s been your friend your whole life, Kylie. Try to see it from his point of view, just for a second. He’s been in love with you for a long, long time. Then, suddenly, you’re with someone else, and he’s frustrated.”
“He never told me. Never let on. How was I supposed to know?” She rolls to her back and lets her eyes close. “If he’d told me, before I met Oz…maybe there could’ve been something. But…he just got so crazy, so jealous. It’s so unlike him, too. He said such horrible things to Oz, Daddy. It wasn’t my Ben saying it. It was like…like he was somebody else. It was so scary.”
“I’m not excusing his behavior, Kylie. I’m not. I’m just saying…give him time.”
“I’ll try.”
“That’s all I’m saying.” I pat her shoulder. “Sleep. We’ll go back there together later.”
She didn’t answer, because she was already asleep.
THIRTEEN: Revelations
Waking up f**king sucks. Especially that initial stage, where you’re just starting to become aware that you’re waking up, and you don’t want to. You want to sink back down. You want to stay under.
But you can’t. You’re dragged upward, fumbling toward the inevitability of waking.
Waking up in agony? Even worse.
Slowly, torturously, I come to awareness. I’ve felt pain before. I’ve endured all sorts of horrible shit. But this? It’s the worst thing I’ve ever felt. A thousand, thousand points of pain, little stabbing sparks of agony all throughout my body, centered on my head and my leg and my arm, spreading out like a spider web.
I hear a monitor beeping. I’m in a goddamn hospital again. Fuck.
I didn’t die. I distinctly remember realizing I was dying. But apparently not.
I blink, find the ceiling above me, the walls, the monitors with their wires all leading to me. A cannula in my nose. I feel heavy. My leg is wrapped in a cast from waist to toe. My arm is in a hard cast again. And my head, f**k, my head aches like someone is pounding on it with a sledgehammer.
My door opens and Kylie’s barging in, rushing for me, and her expression is shell-shocked, haunted. “Oz.” She says it strangely. “Hi, baby.”