Enough to Miss Christmas

He came over and snuggled on Karen's other side and hugged his daughter. "I'm so sorry, baby. I was so wrong." He somehow managed to hold back the tears I knew were close.

"I'm sorry to, Daddy. I should . . ."

"Stop it!" I shouted, startling them both. "Karen, don't say you should have done anything! You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. Nothing. Do you hear me? I won't even let you say the words. You did nothing wrong. There was nothing you should have done!"

"I shouldn't have been there and if I'd come out . . ."

"Stop it! You were ten years old! If you say that again, I'll make you sit in the love chair until tomorrow!" I'd shocked a half-smile out of her, but she continued.

"I wasn't supposed to be in the cellar. . ."

"Okay, big deal but the statute of limitations ran out on that minor offense. No punishment necessary. It's been too long ago. It has nothing to do with what occurred in that cellar. Let's talk about your mother instead. She did an awful thing but I'll bet she wouldn't have done it if she had a hint you were nearby. Remember. She did it. No one else. It was her choice. Why did she do it? We don't know. Maybe her mind got all messed up with her illness or drugs she had to take. It was a terrible thing to happen, but it's over and done with and we all have to move on. No more talking about 'what-ifs' or guilt. It happened and we're not going to hide it anymore. Anytime you want to talk about your mom or her death, it's an open subject." Paul cringed but I moved on. "Now, let's talk about lying. No statute of limitations on that sin. It's a major offense. What are we going to do about it?"

"Are you going to make Daddy sit in the love chair?" Karen said. I couldn't believe the relief I felt at her hint of humor. For the first time I sensed we'd make it through this session, probably the most intense family discussion any of us would endure in a lifetime. Just the right mixes of humor and honesty was doing the trick.

"No way will he get off that easily. He gathers all the wood on our camping trip and washes all the dishes, and he has to perform any other chores we can think of. What else?"

"What would Grandma have done if you lied?" Karen asked, her voice tense.

"She would have sent us to the pantry to wait until my father came home and he would have taken a hairbrush to our backside!" I added quickly, "Your father is much too old for that sort of punishment, and besides, we don't do that stuff here. Think of something else," I offered.