Destroyed

I lay on my side, gasping like a fucking dying fish as Poison delivered kick after kick to my ribs. I kept my body clenched against the onslaught, protecting bones with thick muscles.

Confusion and memories—the mess in my brain—evaporated, giving clarity.

When Poison’s leg came in grabbing distance, I reared up and head-butted his chest. He went down just like a giant oak tree, bouncing on the springy floor. “What the fuck, Fox?”

Climbing to my feet awkwardly, I kicked him once. “I said I wouldn’t put you back in the hospital, not that I wouldn’t try.”

“That’s a lie. You said you wouldn’t touch me. Period.”

I smiled, feeling a trickle of hot metallic drip from my nose into my mouth. “Oops.”

He charged upright and lunged. His shoulder connected with my chest, driving me backward to collide with the ropes.

I closed my eyes as he trapped me and welcomed the flurry of fists to my sides. Every bruise sent pleasure and relief. Every agony helped me inch toward bliss.

Poison danced away, fists held upright, protecting himself. I advanced, arms tied behind my back. Breathing was difficult. Seeing was difficult. Every movement screamed with pain. But I couldn’t stop yet. Not yet.

“Fox. Do—” he shouted just as I sprung and roundhoused his ear. Victory thudded swift and hot even as my wrists grew slick with blood from the twine.

Poison stumbled to the side, holding his head where I’d kicked him. His bald scalp showed a massive swelling building under the skin.

“You’ll pay for that,” he growled.

“Come and get me.” I stood taller, leaving myself wide open for a free shot to my jaw.

He wasn’t stupid. He sensed the trap and backed away, searching for a weakness. His hands flexed as he plotted his next manoeuvre.

I knew the moment he made a decision and jumped as high as I could go as he charged. The moment he rammed into me, my legs wrapped around his waist, and I used my skull to crash against his.

He stumbled, falling to the floor, landing on his side with me clinging to him. More stars flashed in my eyes, but I didn’t unlock my ankles.

He walloped me in the side, sending dull agony through my lower back. Another fist connected with my solar plexus, collapsing my lungs, so I couldn’t catch a breath.

Then he did a cheap shot.

An elbow landed in my groin. My balls shot inward, yelping in excruciation. Fire licked right through me. My legs let go on their own accord, and he pushed me away with an angry grunt.

The crowd’s chants and encouragement for Poison clanged in my ears. The agony of the junk shot sent nausea building in my gut.

Fucking cheater.

I rolled to my knees, bowing over bent legs, gasping through the wash of pain.

Poison stood, breathing hard. A cut spewed blood from his forehead, tracking on either side of his nose. “Done, Fox?”

“You’re never done. No matter what condition your body is in. You always finish the objective.” My handler stood above me with the all too familiar crowbar. He’d beaten me bloody enough times for me to shudder whenever he came near. I was right to fear him.

“Answer me, operative.”

“Yes, sir.” I kept my eyes downcast as he patrolled around me. I stood steadfast, not letting him see my fear. Out of nowhere, he thwacked the crowbar on my thighbone. It snapped with a horrible crunch.

I bit my lip so hard it bled like a waterfall in my mouth, but I didn’t move from my position. I didn’t make a sound.

Shoving a gun with a silencer into my grip, he pointed toward the horizon where a compound full of diplomats and informants rested. “Go finish your mission, operative. If you succeed, then we’ll fix your leg.”

I nodded once and clutched the gun as if it could give me pain relief.

I hobbled off to work.

“Never done, Oaks,” I growled, launching myself upright. Dropping my shoulder, I knocked him off his feet and went down with him. He punched my jaw and my cheekbone, until a few teeth rattled, and I could no longer see out of my right eye.

Only when I let all the fight out of my body and flopped to the side did he stop punching me. “Done now, motherfucker?”

I grinned, no longer in my broken and bruised body, but floating in a sea of calmness. Peace, serenity—a drug of oblivion.

“Yes. Now I’m done.”

“You need to stop him from coming here. I’m done giving him his fucked-up therapy.”

I left my pain free haze, where no thoughts or flashbacks existed to pay attention to the rumble of male voices. A car door slammed, blocking off the noise of street life and night time comings and goings.

My body ached liked I’d been run over by a fucking train.

“Got it. It won’t happen again,” Oz’s cultured voice drifted quietly.

Goddammit, why had Poison called him? The one man I didn’t want to see. The man I owed an apology to. I could’ve driven home after I slept off the worst of it.

Swallowing, I winced. Okay, maybe I would need longer than just to sleep it off, but that’s what I loved about Poison Oaks. He gave me what I needed.

And I’d desperately needed an ass-kicking.

If you’re not careful you’ll turn him into your handler. Be a fucking man and own your own life.

I would if I knew how. How was a rogue killer supposed to exist in a world of hierarchy if he had no orders to follow?

They gave you the pill to end it. You know that’s what’s expected of you.

The cyanide pill they’d given me rested in my safe hidden in my wardrobe. I hadn’t done what was expected as I wanted to live.

I wanted to see what everyone else had—to live a different kind of life.

I twisted a little on the backseat where I’d been laid. The pain resonated through my body, keeping me focused and present. Smiling, I sighed.

Tonight was a good night.

Tonight had purged me enough to be safe around Zel.

Tomorrow, I would find her and beg for a second chance.

“Wake up, you idiot. We’re home.”

My left eye had swollen shut and the one that was still operational had a red haze over it from the blood oozing from my hairline.

Oscar opened the car door, glowering.

I glared back, squinting against the lights of the house illuminating him as he stood with his hands on his hips like a disgruntled father.

Bet he was glad he wasn’t my true father.

I killed him.

Swallowing hard, I focused on the aches and pains, so as not to remember last night. I couldn’t think about raping Zel—about the monster I’d become.

Groaning loudly, I pulled myself upright and practically fell out of the car.

Oscar grabbed me under the arm, hoisting me to my feet. This time I didn’t care that he touched me—his fingers held violence not companionship. I was used to that.

Instead of helping me into the building, he shoved me forward as if he couldn’t bear to look at me. “Get some rest. I’ll send up a medic.”

I stumbled and weaved forward. My ears pricked as he muttered, “God have mercy on your fucked-up soul.”

Giving him the one finger salute over my shoulder, I continued my swaying and shuffling journey toward my home.

My body creaked and complained, but slowly remembered how to move.

My blurry eyes peered at the horizon. Heavy black velvet blotted out all the stars and moonlight. I estimated the time was around two in the morning.

Shit. All I wanted to do was crash and sleep, but I couldn’t.

The sun would be missing for another four hours.

I would have to wait for my one and only friend to appear and protect me from nightmares.

My vigil for daylight had begun.

Chapter 9

I’d always prided myself on being strong, on not taking life’s nonsense lying down, but that changed when I was told Clara only had a few months left to live.

The illusion of power over one’s destiny was a lie. The biggest lie of all.

Her immune system was her enemy and for that I hated life with an ever burning passion. I lost faith in humanity, in fairness, in myself.

I let my weakness put me in a situation where a man took brutal advantage of me.

But in his violence, he made me remember.

He reminded me of my past, my temper, my courage.

He gave me back my backbone and I would never let it go again.

I would teach him why I’d christened myself Hunter.

The hunt had begun to make him pay.

“Zelly, is that you?” Clue popped her head from her bedroom, black hair tussled from sleep.

I quietly locked the front door behind me, sighing. “Yes, I’m back.”

I hadn’t expected Oscar—the opinionated idiot who worked with Fox—to bring me home. When he spotted me sneaking through the semi-empty fighting floor just before sundown, I worried he’d throw me over his shoulder and take me back to Fox.

Instead he’d smiled and apologised for being a dick the night before and offered to take me wherever I wanted. We didn’t say much on the way back, and we fell into a companionable silence that smoothed over the animosity between us.

The drive from the Eastern Suburbs to Inner Suburbs took longer than I wanted with traffic, and the lack of sleep caught up to me. All I wanted to do was curl up in a familiar bed and forget.

About everything.

Clue glanced at the door opposite hers and made sure it was shut tightly against inquisitive ears of my daughter.

Shuffling forward in her pink unicorn slippers and matching huge t-shirt, she looked about fourteen years old. “I thought you said you’d be gone for a while?” She slapped a hand over her mouth as a yawn caught her unaware. “What happened?”

The apartment smelled of oregano and basil from whatever Clue had cooked for dinner. The second-hand couch was covered in a daisy-print fabric, and our mix-match coffee table was an entirely different world compared to the sleek black violence of Fox’s mansion.

This place resonated rainbows thanks to Clara’s bright artwork blue-tacked to the walls and an odd assortment of knick-knacks. Fox’s place was morbid in the use of nothing but midnight. No wonder he seemed so lost and alone. He lived in the never ending dark.

My hands closed around Clue’s dress, hating that my mind kept skipping back to him. I toyed with the idea of never going back, but he deserved a piece of his own medicine and I still wanted the money he’d promised.

Every time I moved the bruises in my core throbbed, reminding me I’d been so stupid to think he’d be gentle. I let lust cloud my judgement.

Last night had been a mistake. I let him sweep me away by playing with my needs. Tonight he would have no effect on me as it was purely business from here on out. I would shut down my desire and forget about anything but scratching off the days on a calendar. Counting down the hours before I never had to see him again.

“What are you wearing?” Clue came forward, eyeing the stolen black trousers and t-shirt. I’d raided Fox’s wardrobe. I didn’t want to travel home looking like a hooker or doing the walk of shame. Not that they fit me very well—the trousers were too loose and the t-shirt too long.

Clue crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow. “So…are you going to tell me what happened? Explain why I had to tell Clara her mum wouldn’t be home?”

My heart squeezed at the thought of how that conversation must’ve gone.

“Change of plans.” I hid my stress with a smile and moved forward to join her in the centre of the small lounge. Her skinny arms came around me, squeezing me tight. I kissed her cheek, wrapping myself tight against her. This little Asian woman had been an island of refuge for me just as much as I’d been for her. The thought of her leaving if things worked out with Corkscrew hurt me deep. I wasn’t ready to let her go. I wasn’t ready for our little trio to change.

It’ll change when Clara dies. The inevitable doom sucker-punched me.

After a moment, she pulled back. “She’s going to be so happy to see you.”