Cursor's Fury (Codex Alera 3)
Page 87Tavi dismounted and walked across the bloodied ground amidst a sudden and total silence. He reached down and took the hilt of his sword, planted a boot on the chest of the Cane, and heaved the weapon free. Then he turned to sweep his gaze around the young cavalrymen and lifted his weapon to them in a salute.
The legionares broke out into cheers that shook the earth, while horses danced nervously. Tavi recovered his mount, while spear leaders and centurions bellowed their men back into position.
Tavi was back on his horse for all of ten seconds before a wave of exhaustion hit like a physical blow. His arm and shoulder ached horribly, and his throat burned with thirst. One of his wrists had blood on it, where it looked like it had trickled out from the torn knuckles beneath his gauntlets. There was a dent as deep as the first joint of his finger in his breastplate, and what looked like the score marks of teeth on one boot that Tavi did not remember ever feeling.
He wanted to sit down somewhere and sleep. But there was work to do. He rode over to the refugees, and was met by a grizzled old holder who still had the general bearing of the military-perhaps a retired career legionare himself. He saluted Tavi, and said, "My name's Vernick, milord." He squinted at the insignia on Tavi's armor. "You aren't one of Lord Cereus's Legions."
"Captain Scipio Rufus," Tavi replied, returning the salute. "First Aleran Legion."
Vernick grunted in surprise and peered at Tavi's face for a moment. "Whoever you are, we're mighty glad to see you, Captain. '
Tavi could all but hear the old man's thoughts. Looks too young for his rank. Must be a strong crofter from the upper ranks of the Citizenry. Tavi felt no need to disabuse him of the notion-not when the truth was considerably more frightening. "I wish I could give you better news, sir, but we're preparing to defend the Elinarch. You'll have to get your people behind the town walls to make them safe."
Vernick heaved out a tired sigh, but nodded. "Aye, milord. I figured it was the most defensible spot hereabouts."
"I understand, milord," the holder said. "Don't you worry, sir. We'll manage."
Tavi nodded and saluted him again, then rode back to the column. Max rode out to meet him and tossed Tavi a water flask.
Tavi caught it, nodded his thanks to Max. "Well?" Tavi asked, then drank deeply from the flask.
"This was as close to ideal as we could ever expect. Caught them on flat, open ground between two forces," Max said quietly. "Fifty-three dead Canim. Two Aleran dead, three wounded, all of them fish. We lost two horses."
Tavi nodded. "Pass the spare mounts off to those holders. They'll make better speed if they can put some of their little ones on the horses' backs. See if they have room in the wagon for our wounded. Speak to a holder named Vernick."
Max grimaced and nodded. "Yes, sir. You mind if I ask our next step?"
"For now, we keep moving down the valley. We kill Canim and help refugees and see if we can spot their main force. I want to send word to the alae in the hills to concentrate again. I don't want bands of eight taking runs at any Canim bat-tlepacks."
"I'll see to it," Max said. He took a breath, and asked, very quietly, "You all right?"
Tavi felt like screaming. Or running and hiding. Or sleeping. Or possibly a combination of the first several, followed by the last. He was not a trained leader of legionares. He had never asked to be in a position of command such as this, never sought to be. That it had happened to him was a simple and enormous fact that was so stunning that he still had not come to grips with its implications. He was accustomed to taking chances-but here, he would take them with lives other than his own. Young men would die-already had died-based upon his decisions.
He felt disoriented, lost somehow, and he almost welcomed the desperation and haste the situation had forced on them, because it gave him something clear and immediate to sink his energy into. Reorganize the command. Decide on a strategy. Deal with a threat. If he kept going forward through the problems without slowing down, he could keep his head on his shoulders. He wouldn't have to think about the pain and death it was his duty, as captain of the Legion, to prevent.
He did not want to pretend that nothing was wrong and project an aura of authority and calm to the young legionares around them. But their confidence and steadiness was critical to their ability to fight and would ultimately improve their chances of survival. So he ignored the parts of himself that wanted to scream in bewildered frustration and focused on the most immediate crisis.
"I'm fine," he told Max, his voice steady. "I don't want to push things too far. If we move too far down the valley and the horses play out, the Canim will run us down before we can get back to Elinarch. But we've got to do everything we can for the holders who are still alive."
Max nodded. "Agreed."
"Max. I'll need you to tell me when you think we're hitting our limits," Tavi said quietly. "And I don't want you pulling any craftings if you don't absolutely need to. You're my hole card, if it comes to that. And you're the closest thing we have to a real healer."
Tavi grimaced. "Tell that to the two who aren't coming back."
"This is a Legion," Max said quietly. "We're going to lose more before the day's out. They knew that there were risks when they volunteered."
"They volunteered to be trained to handle themselves and led by experienced officers," Tavi said quietly. "Not for this."
"Life isn't certain or fair. That isn't anyone's fault. Even yours. "
Tavi glanced at Max and nodded grudgingly. He turned his horse, staring farther down the valley, where more helpless holders tried to run for safety. It felt like the day must have been nearly over, but the cloud-veiled sun couldn't have been halfway to its peak. "What were their names, Max? The men who died."
"I don't know," Max confessed. "There hasn't been time."
"Find out for me?"