Crossing the Mirage:Passing Through Youth

“Oh God,” said Chandra, “how unfair to love itself.”

“Well, Gopal felt the same way,” said Sathya, “why he said it was cruel on her part to treat me so shabbily. Oh, what fuss she used to make before accepting my loving presents in keeping with her tastes! Why, she left the Kashmir shawl I gave her in the office drawer for days together and I had to go on my knees to make her take that home.”

“Why, it's like the police syndrome!” said Chandra. “Harass and then ask to pass under the table.”

“Once I said as much to her and she made a friend of hers to talk to me,” said Sathya in a trance. “Her friend, Gomathi, said Kala has a golden heart with a troubled mind. She said that given her state of mind, Kala can be expected to act quite cranky and she needs all my sympathy and understanding. She said she believed that with my abiding love, I could wean Kala away from her self-defeating love and provide substance to her empty life. Gomathi said she was confident that my love and perseverance would save the day for her friend in the end. Wasn't it just what I wanted to hear all along? Gomathi's testimony only strengthened my resolve to make Kala my wife. Whatever I fail to understand her and she remains as much a puzzle to me as the city she lives in.”

“Keep in the limbo sort, isn't it?” said Chandra in apparent suspicion.

“Isn't it possible given her confusion?” said Sathya after deliberating for a while. “And to add to my woes, my boss, who detested me, had his own agenda to fix me. My brewing involvement with Kala, that was a common knowledge at the office by then, came in handy for him to blow it into a full-fledged scandal. To settle his scores with me, he pressurized her to lodge a complaint of sexual harassment against me. Well, she refused to oblige him and I put in his chamcha’s ears that he better minded his business or else. Well, there seems to be some poetic justice in life‟s reactions to our actions! Shortly thereafter, Amala the fresher, bowled him on the same wicket, and that cost him his place in the team. That's a different story, anyway.”

“Oh, how unfairly fair?” said Chandra.

“But with me life is fairly unfair,” said Sathya as his sense of bitterness began to overpower even his feeling of love. “Oh, how she made living a hell for me! Why blame her, as I allowed myself to be taken for granted and toyed with me as she pleased. You know, she even nicknamed me "mud head‟.”