Crossing the Mirage:Passing Through Youth

“Oh, is there any better way of forgiving?” Said Chandra in admiration, “But still, isn't it sad such a love got wasted?”

“I don't think so,” said Sathya stoically. “I feel it's the force of my love that pushed her towards her own goal. If not for the reality of our affair, perhaps, her lover wouldn't have ever agreed to marry her. That way, my love would have served her cause. It appears that, in some men at least, the infidelity of the spouse acts as a tonic to boost their own love for the erring. It's as if the thought that someone else values his woman, increases her worth in his own eyes! And also, the fact of her loving another man makes him crave to win back her love for him. So he tries to regain her favor by wooing her afresh to wean her away from his rival. When in the end, his positional advantage helps him to regain her, he feels vindicated. Maybe, that‟s what would've made him tie the knot with her after all that dodging.‟

“Why, it's possible,” said Chandra, “but was their wedding worth your suffering?”

“Why, it's worth much more than that,” said Sathya feeling indignant. “Amidst my tears, that New Year's Eve ushered in a new dawn in my life. I was hurt not so much for having been jilted by Kala, as for her having dragged me willy-nilly into the mess, involved as she was with another man. Had she declared upfront that her heart was occupied; I was no fool to fancy my chances of winning her mind. If not for her flirting, would have my budding desire for her blossomed into an overriding passion? Surely, I wouldn't have come to grief in the end if I had known her mind in the beginning. As I told you, I always romanticized winning a woman in unrequited love, unable to get over her past to look into the future. Why, that's the impression Kala gave me while actually carrying on with him, love or no love, but with the idea of sticking to him if only he called her bidding. But, as you felt before now I realize I was a victim of her idea to have a second string to her bow, just in case.”

“Somehow, it all looked fishy to me from the beginning.”

“Whatever, in that hour of my tragedy,” said Sathya with tears gushing out from his eyes, “I could see the poetic justice of it all, for the girl who loved me, and whom I lost. As I told you, now I'm seized with an urge to meet and seek her forgiveness. So to say, I'm being consumed by the passion for her forgiveness. That's the sole mission of my life now and I don't wish to die before she pardons me.”