Blindness

I don’t say anything, but I take in a deep breath. I make my way into the diner to the corner booth in the back where Cody is now flipping through an endless menu. I slide in on one side and give him plenty of distance, but Gabe slides in after me, forcing me to move over more.

Cody tosses the menu down on the table and leans back into the booth, closing his eyes and squeezing the bridge of his nose. “This place has shit food. Why do we come here?” he asks, clearly picking a fight now.

“It doesn’t have shit food. You love the cheeseburger and pancakes, and you’re just grumpy because you’re hungry. Now knock it off, asshat,” Gabe says right back at him, not even missing a beat. If anything, I’m amused by the banter between the two of them.

Cody notices my smile and calls me on it when I let out a stifled laugh. “What’s funny?” he asks, trying to keep his attitude up with me, but slipping just a little as I see him struggle not to curl his lip.

“Nothing—” I start, but the more I think about the two of them, the more I laugh. “It’s just…you two are funny. I never had any of that, a friend like that? And what’s an asshat?”

Cody stares at me for a few seconds, his gaze hooded, trying to read me, and then he visibly relaxes, flopping his hands flat on the table in front of him. “An asshat is just that—it’s a hat you wear on your ass,” he says, his tone serious.

Gabe picks up right where he leaves off, and I turn my attention his way. “Yes. Basically, someone has to earn the right to be an ass**le. Asshat is like ass**le in training,” he says.

The waitress comes up just as Gabe is finishing, and we all work to keep from laughing at what she must have heard. Gabe orders us all waters, and she leaves to get them. My stomach makes a churning sound, and I realize I’m extremely hungry. I flip through the menu to the breakfast section, and am instantly overwhelmed.

“Oh my god. There must be like fifty items on here,” I say, honestly stressed out over having to make a decision. Cody reaches over to pull my menu toward him slightly and leans in to look with me. I tense up at his closeness and look at Gabe who smiles knowingly and pulls his menu up to give us pseudo-privacy.

“If you’re going with breakfast, you have to get the pancakes. Trust me on this,” Cody says, turning to face me. His eyes soften when he realizes how close we are. He sucks in his top lip, and all I want to do is touch it, chase it into his mouth. He’s wearing a plain gray T-shirt and a pair of dirty jeans, with garage oil marks all over them. He’s sexy as hell, and so close to me I’m tempted to jump into his lap. But I stay put and turn my head back to the menu, feeling the force of his eyes on me the entire time—and I’m eating it up.

“Okay, just pancakes?” I ask, looking over the options in front of me, but not reading a damn word.

“Bacon, you probably like bacon?” he says, now turning to look at the menu with me.

“Love bacon. Done, pancakes and bacon,” I say, closing the menu and tucking it back in the stand at the center of the table. “That’s twice you’ve helped me out today. Looks like I owe you.”

I’m flirting now. I’m terrible at it—this I know. I’ve never really flirted before. With Trevor, he did all the talking. He asked me out, he made the first moves, and he has always been in charge.

Trevor. I haven’t thought of him all day. I’m starting to let the guilt creep in when I feel Cody’s arm against mine briefly, and then Trevor is gone from my mind in an instant.

“So, Charlie. What are you doing for Halloween this year?” Gabe asks.

The thought of Halloween is always strange—handing out the candy is the toughest. Halloween was ours—Mac and me. It was the one holiday that we were always a father and a daughter. I think of that last year when we were together passing out candy. We both ate through a giant bag of candy corn, making ourselves sick. We were in horrible stomach pain, but I wouldn’t trade that memory for anything in the world.

“Charlie?” I feel Cody’s hand on mine under the table, and I jump.

“Oh, sorry. I was just thinking,” I admit. Cody gives my hand a small squeeze, almost like he knows without knowing. I smile, but it falls instantly, because I know where I’ll be on Halloween—I’ll be in Washington, with Trevor.

“I’m…out of town this weekend. Why?” I ask, hoping we don’t divert into a talk about my plans with Trevor.

Cody’s hand slips away, and I miss it the moment it’s gone. I pull my own hands together in my lap and link them together just to hide the feeling.