At Love's Cost

"When you came to me, when you spoke to me, my heart leapt as if--well,

as if something good had happened to me--something that had never

happened before. When I went away the picture of you standing at the

door, waving your hand, went with me, and--stayed with me. I could not

get you out of my mind--could think of nothing else. Even in the

meeting with my father, whom I hadn't seen for so long, the thought of

you kept with me. I tried to get rid of it--to forget you, but it was

of no use: sleeping and waking, you--_you were with me!_"

His voice grew almost harsh in its intensity, and the hand that had

hung so stilly beside her closed on the skirt of her dress in her

effort to keep the hot blush from her face.

"When I rode out the next day it was only with the hope of seeing you.

It seemed to me there was only one thing I wanted: to see you again; to

look into your eyes, to hear you speak. All that I had heard about

you--well, I dwelt upon it, and I felt that I must help you. It seemed

as if Fate--Chance--oh, I don't know what to call it!--had _sent_ me to

help you. And when I saw you--ah, well, I can't expect you to

understand what I felt!"

He stopped again, as if he himself were trying to understand it.

"The feeling that fate had something to do with it--you see, it was

quite by chance I started fishing that afternoon, that I saw you at the

house--gave me courage to ask you to let me help you. It sounded

ridiculous to you--of course it did!--but if you only knew how much it

meant to me! It meant that I should see you again; perhaps every day

for--for a long time: ah, well, it meant just life and death to me. And

now--!"

His breath came fast, his eyes dwelt upon her with passionate

eagerness; but he forced himself to speak calmly than he might not

frighten her from his side, might not lose her.

--"Now the truth has come upon me, quite suddenly. It was just now when

I saw that you cared what had happened to me, cared if I were

hurt!--Oh, I know, it was just because you were frightened, it was just

a woman's pity for a fellow that had come to harm, the fear lest I had

broken any bones; but--ah, it showed me my heart, it told me how much I

loved you! Yes; I love you! You are all the world to me: nothing else

matters, _nothing!_"